Why You Dont Feel Confident When You Speak English

hey you want to speak english with

confidence right you’re tired of feeling

nervous

and feeling frustrated when someone asks

you a question and you can’t answer with

confidence

i totally understand when i was learning

korean i

experienced the same thing i had moments

when i would walk up to someone and then

suddenly forget everything that i wanted

to say

and then i realized there were six

reasons why i didn’t feel confident

and i want to explain these reasons to

you and give you the solutions

but before i do that i need your help

you see my goal is to help

one billion students a big number around

the world

just like you learn how to speak english

with

confidence but i need your help i need

you to do three things

very quickly i need you to like this

video i need you to share this video and

i need you to subscribe

one more time like this video share this

video

and subscribe can you do that for me i

really appreciate it

well i’m teacher tiffany let’s jump

right in

[Music]

all right there are six reasons why you

don’t feel confident when you speak in

english

now don’t go anywhere because in the

middle of this lesson there’s a special

challenge that includes

a reward alright so reason number

one you keep focusing on other people’s

opinions

basically you don’t feel confident

because you are constantly thinking

about what other people think about your

english

skills this is something i struggled

with as well when i was learning korean

why because every time i would get into

a conversation

and it would be my turn to say something

my

first thought was shoot what do they

think about me

shoot are they going to judge me when i

speak

korean or shoot man

i don’t really know this person that

well and if i speak in a way that’s not

good i think they’re gonna look at me in

a bad way

i was focused on what other people would

think of me

i was focused on other people’s opinions

whether it had been my

teacher or other students or people i

came in contact with that didn’t know me

i was focused on everybody else’s

opinions and that’s why i didn’t feel as

confident when i spoke in korean so

again this is one of the reasons why you

don’t feel as confident when you speak

english but there are some fixes fix

number one

figure out why you care so much

that’s right figure out the root cause

why do you care about other people’s

opinions so for example for me

i realized that i cared about

other students who were doing better

than me i was comparing myself

in my class i was the oldest in my class

at that time

and it seemed like the other students

were learning so much

faster than i was so whenever i would go

to speak in the back of my head i would

think ah

they’re gonna be like okay tiffany’s not

as good as us

and i would focus on their opinions but

the root cause was because i was

comparing

my progress to theirs i was looking at

how far they had progressed and then

looking at myself and saying

i’m not good enough so that’s why i was

focused on their opinions

but if you figure out the reason why

you’re focused on other people’s

opinions

you can start to stop focusing because

once i realized that

i stopped focusing as much on their

opinions

next redirect your thoughts you see i

had to learn

again it was not their problem they

really weren’t

bad at all they weren’t thinking

anything negatively but i had to learn

how to

redirect my thoughts so right before i

would speak in korean

when that thought entered my mind like

oh tiff

you know brandon’s thinking i would say

nope i’m not gonna think that thought

let me switch my thoughts you have to

actually do the same thing

when you’re about to speak if you feel

that coming on that

that that idea that hey people around me

are gonna kind of judge me

immediately redirect your thoughts you

can change your thoughts and it will

help you feel more

confident the other fix is find out your

opinion of yourself now this is

something very

interesting this is basically self

reflection

many times as human beings it doesn’t

matter what country you live in or where

you’re from

as human beings we care about other

people

but sometimes we care too much about

other people’s opinions

and we forget to think about what we

actually think about ourselves self

reflection stop and think hey

what do i think about myself realize

that you are learning a second language

realize how much you have learned and

you need to develop your own opinion of

yourself

this is going to help you feel more

confident because your focus will stop

being on other people’s opinions and

you’ll start looking at yourself for

example

i know i’m an early bird i know i’m very

productive i know i’m a very efficient

person

so i focus on those aspects of who i am

so if someone else comes to me and says

uh tiffany you’re not a hard worker

i’m not even affected i don’t even care

what they think about me why because

i know who i am i know my opinion of

myself when it comes to work

the same is true when you’re thinking

about your speaking ability

figure out your opinion of yourself you

can heal yourself

too have a good opinion of yourself all

right

so reason number two here we go

reason number two is you set challenging

english goals basically you don’t feel

confident because you have set

goals that don’t match the amount of

time

you have to achieve them let me break

this one down because

i saw this issue with many of my

students when i was in south korea you

see what happens is

students maybe just like you set

unachievable goals

stay with me a student would come to me

and say teacher i said hey yeah what’s

going on how are you

teacher i need to pass this test maybe

it was the ielts exam or opic exam

i said okay tell me you know when is the

test

the student would say teacher the test

is next month

i said huh so you’re telling me you have

four weeks

the student said yep i have four weeks

and i want to get a perfect score

now again i am a very encouraging

teacher i

make it a point to help students like

you achieve

goals but the student would come to me

telling me that she only had four weeks

to prepare for a major exam and she

wanted to ace the exam

that’s an unrealistic goal an

unachievable goal

again i knew her level so what happens

sometimes you set goals it’s very

important to set goals

but sometimes you set goals that are not

realistic for example you may say

i want to learn a thousand english

vocabulary words

in two weeks come on now come on now

now i think you are very intelligent but

in two weeks that

that’s really not realistic so instead

now when you do that you start to feel

less confident

because you have this goal and you’re

like shoot i didn’t reach my goal

so when you go to speak you’re like i

didn’t reach that goal

i know i can’t speak this is what you

need to do there are three fixes for

this

set and achieve small goals on a regular

basis

confidence is built on accomplishment

remember a few weeks back i taught you

all how to learn three thousand

vocabulary words in a year

now three thousand is a big number right

but notice

i said in a year and then during the

class

i broke down how you can actually learn

that many

words in a year we divided it by

52 weeks then we divided the week so

in essence every single day you need to

learn between six

to seven english vocabulary words

you can do that right because we broke

down that larger goal into smaller goals

so now there’s no sense of of urgency or

anticipation or frustration

why because you know you have a small

goal

that is achievable that you can do and

you feel more confident in your

abilities because

you start to focus on that smaller goal

so again students that joined the weekly

english words membership if you want to

join it’s weeklyenglishwords.com

students who joined that membership now

they’re seeing oh

all i have to do is learn a certain

number of words every day and i’m okay

and that’s one way of actually feeling

more confident

now another fix is right here focus on

what you can

change there are going to be many things

that you experience

as you learn english you’re going to

have many things that

may seem difficult or challenging but

you’ll also have things that you know

you can

change had a student asked me about

pronunciation the other evening

she and i had a great conversation and

she was like tiff how can i improve my

pronunciation

and i gave her a method i said hey when

i was learning korean

i would watch korean dramas and i

wouldn’t have a notebook

as i was watching the dramas i would

just sit there and repeat what they said

to myself but i was still enjoying the

program

i recognized that what i could do was

repeat or shadow the individuals that i

was watching

in the korean drama right so figure out

what you can change and don’t focus on

the things that you can’t at the moment

the other fix is right here visualize

success this is something that i love

doing as well the reason why you don’t

feel as confident is because you feel

like you can’t attain

certain goals but if you visualize

success

again on my wall behind me i have

all of my goals for the year why do i do

that because there are points and

moments in time where i feel like

i want to help 1 billion students speak

english with confidence but

man that’s a large goal so i’ve broken

down that goal

into smaller parts and smaller chunks so

periodically i’ll look at my wall

and i’ll see okay tiff your goal is one

billion students but for this year

this is all you need to do and that

makes me feel more

confident in my ability to achieve that

goal the same thing goes for you as you

are trying to build

confidence in your speaking ability

instead of setting

unachievable goals or really challenging

goals

pick a goal it can be a big goal but

break it down into smaller chunks

and you will recognize yourself suddenly

feeling

more confident now the third reason is

right here

you don’t feel prepared when you speak

basically you don’t feel confident

because your mind goes blank

during conversations and you don’t know

what to say i experienced this

so many times when i was studying korean

i felt like i couldn’t give

a very logical answer when certain

topics came up

i would kind of go to the back or lean

back a little bit so that no one would

call on me because i didn’t know what to

say

so i felt less confident now if they

asked me to give my

introduction or talk about my

experiences in america

i could easily express those things in

korean because i knew the topics

but whenever something came up that i

didn’t know about i

really felt less confident so i didn’t

feel prepared

now what are the fixes for this one here

we go

prepare and practice

now here’s where the challenge comes in

okay you see because what you have to do

is

prepare ahead of time there are many

different videos on youtube

again amazing english teachers i’m not

the only english teacher

there are other awesome english teachers

on youtube and they talk about different

topics

so you can prepare before you speak

english by watching some videos

by listening to some podcasts and

getting the information you need

now here’s the challenge you see today’s

video is being brought to you by

cat cabling now cambly and i have been

working together for a long time

i almost said a different word now

kaylee and i

we work together and i love working with

them because they care about you all

so here’s the challenge what you need to

do is in the comment section

tell us your favorite method for

practicing

what you learn that’s right we all have

different ways of studying

when i was studying korean i had a

different method than other students

maybe you have a unique method maybe you

get up in the morning and you listen to

a radio show

maybe you get up in the morning and you

watch something on your phone from

tiktok or

from another uh media social media

platform

whatever your specific method is for

studying

i want you to tell us about it in the

comment section

here’s where the challenge comes once

you put it in the comment section

i will select one individual that’s

right one individual who has

written down and explained his or her

favorite way for practicing english and

that student is going to win

60 minutes of practice time

with a cambly tutor i i told you it was

a great one

i told you it was a good one that’s

right one student is going to get the

opportunity to practice with a native

english speaker

for 60 minutes that’s right again we’re

talking about feeling more confident

and part of feeling more confident is

being prepared

is practicing so i want you to practice

with a native english teacher

so all you have to do once again is in

the comment section

tell us your favorite method for

practicing what you learn

maybe you watch movies maybe you write

something in your notebook whatever it

is

share it in the comment section and this

is why i like this challenge again

gives you an opportunity to practice

speaking in english by typing

and it also helps you help each other

because you may have a method

that another student can see and say oh

i really like the way

he or she studies i’m going to do the

same thing

so you can help each other you got it

all right good

cambly thank you so much for sponsoring

this video and for being willing to help

the students

improve their english all right so

what’s the other fix

again we talked about not being prepared

or not feeling prepared and that affects

your confidence

here’s the other thing you can do take

a deep

breath i noticed when i was studying

korean

that whenever i felt nervous or less

confident i would start speaking fast

not good but just fast and i would start

fumbling over my words and things would

come out very jumbled the grammar was

really bad

and i just didn’t speak well

if i had known this right here simply

take a deep breath and we talked about

it in a previous video i told you

all that it’s okay to say

let me let me think about that for a

second you see how i paused for that

long period of time

you can do the same thing if you need to

gather your thoughts

and if you want to speak with confidence

it’s okay to pause

but do a proper pause

like that alright so take a deep breath

the other fix

is be fearless mind

over matter push through your

nervousness again i get it i totally

understand

when you don’t feel prepared you start

getting nervous

you really don’t want to speak because

you don’t think you have the words to

say

but be fearless it’s okay

take a deep breath remind yourself

i am learning another language i do know

enough

i can give my opinion and start

speaking mind over matter

don’t allow yourself to be tricked to

think that you’re not able to speak

english with confidence

you can do it you have to be fearless

all right now reason number four here we

go

this is because you focus on your

mistakes and think you can’t

basically you don’t feel confident

because you are constantly thinking

about the mistakes you made in the past

man oh man when i say i did this

all the time i would focus on the things

that i got

wrong when i’d have a conversation with

my professor

or with a classmate or with one of my

korean friends if i made a mistake

i would think about that mistake for the

rest of the day

and sometimes even throughout the night

i would have a bad dream

why because i felt like i had been

studying for so long

why was i making the same mistakes maybe

they’re thinking i’m really not a good

speaker

you see what happened right i would go

to start thinking about

their opinions of me so many things

would run through my head and again you

probably experienced the same thing

but this is what is causing you to feel

less confident

you need to stop focusing on your

mistakes so here’s what we got to do

fix number one be nice to

your self this is something that i think

as human beings we forget sometimes

we have to be nice to ourselves right

you can beat yourself up sometimes no

one can see what’s going on but in your

head you may say to yourself oof

you’ve been studying english for five

years you still don’t know that word

or oof you’ve been studying english for

10 years

and you still can’t express yourself

sometimes these thoughts run through

your head

and i want to encourage you to stop

doing that

be nice to yourself again remember in

the previous example we talked about

encouraging yourself by developing an

opinion of yourself

remember you are amazing you’re learning

another language

for some of you your third fourth or

even fifth language

be nice to yourself the next fix is

right here

remember that everyone makes mistakes

when speaking

english it’s true even americans

even people from england like we all

make mistakes just like you make

mistakes in your own

mother tongue it’s okay to make a

mistake

no one is asking you to be perfect it’s

alright

just express yourself and i want you to

remember that

the next fix is right here list your

past successes this is something that’s

going to help a lot

you know right now you may be feeling

like ah there’s so many other things i

want to do

so many more words i want to learn but i

don’t want you to forget

what you’ve already done because when

you think about your past

successes instead of your mistakes you

get a boost

of energy to keep going forward learning

more but when you only focus on your

mistakes suddenly

you start to feel bad and less confident

but if you remember wait a minute last

year i was a beginner

now i’m able to understand everything

teacher tiffany says

i’m able to express myself and apply the

methods she taught me

wow i am amazing and i want you guys to

realize how amazing you

are so again list your past

successes now reason number five

why you feel less confident you don’t

feel like you are learning

fast enough basically you don’t feel

confident because

you think you are learning english at a

slow pace

and that you don’t know enough to

express yourself

again this is something that i’ve heard

from so many students

and some of my students in the past few

months have told me this

like teacher i don’t feel like i’m

learning enough i need to learn more

vocabulary what can i do i need to learn

more more and more

and i agree it’s important to continue

learning which is why you’re watching

this video and which is why i’m making

the video for you

but the truth is you need to understand

that going fast is not always the answer

it’s not about how fast you learn it’s

about

how fast you are able to put into use or

put into practice

what you actually learn so what’s the

fix again right here

monitor your progress this is something

that will help you a lot so if you have

a notebook

write down when you learn a new word

write it down when you learn a new

concept

write it down you can record yourself i

encourage students that are in my

academy so much

record a video clip talk about what you

learned

today talk about what a word you like

it’s important to record yourself on a

video clip or write something down

because

then you have a way to go back and see

your progress and this actually

results in you feeling more confident

it’s amazing how the brain works

it’s like a psychology uh like the

interesting psychology behind this

it’s not just about oh i don’t feel

confident uh i need to speak more

there’s a lot more to it part of it is

you need to monitor your progress

now the other fix is right here practice

regularly based on a set schedule

this is also important set a schedule

for yourself so for example when i used

to exercise

before the pandemic at the gym i would

go at the same time

every morning i would go at 5am and i’d

see the same people every morning i get

on the same machine

and i run and then i go play basketball

with one of the guys that was there

but i had a routine and this routine was

actually very helpful

you need the same thing when you are

studying

english and trying to improve your

ability to speak english with confidence

this routine actually creates confidence

because the more i exercised the more i

got up in the morning and followed the

routine the more

the the better i felt about myself like

tiff yesterday you exercise at 5 00 am

and then 2 days ago you exercised at 5am

you

know you can do it today and it was like

i was encouraging myself

and the same will happen for you if you

pick to

learn three words today learn three

words every day

you can say hey yesterday i learned

three words so today i’m going to learn

three words and tomorrow i’m going to

learn three words

practice regularly and it will make you

feel more confident and that will affect

your ability to speak

english here’s the other fix follow

through

do what you say and you will respect

yourself more too

this actually happened this morning

right before this video

i you know because of the pandemic i

hadn’t been exercising a lot because i

couldn’t go to the gym

and i still can’t go to the gym so i

bought a jump rope

but i hadn’t been using the jump rope

because i was busy and i

finally said you know what let me do

this before i start working

so i was jumping rope and i had a goal

and i got halfway to the goal and i got

tired and i said

ah i really want to stop here and i mean

no one’s telling me i have to do it i

can stop

but then i heard a little voice in my

head that said tiff

if you reach your goal and you

accomplish it you achieve it you’re

gonna feel

so much better about yourself and i

pushed through

i followed through and i did what i had

uh achieved that i went i wanted to

achieve you see even right there

even americans make mistakes it’s okay

guys

but no i did what i wanted to do

and i felt so much better after so the

same is true for you

you want to learn fast but instead of

trying to learn so fast

simply follow through with what your

goal

is remember small achievable goals

this will help you feel more confident

when you speak english

and now the sixth reason you don’t enjoy

learning english now i know this comes

at a shock

as a shock to some but a lot of times

you don’t really enjoy studying english

i think you enjoy these videos hopefully

i enjoy talking to you

but basically you don’t feel confident

because you don’t enjoy

what you are learning in english in

other words you feel

stressed whenever you study

it makes a difference when you don’t

enjoy

something the information you’re

studying has a harder time

going in so you feel less confident

because it’s not really

solidified in your mind so when you go

to access it it’s harder

here are the fixes for this one

celebrate

the small stuff when you learn something

hey you better be happy about it right

celebrate the small stuff

if you meet an american if you actually

have a conversation with someone in

english

celebrate the small stuff if you write a

comment in the comment section

when you participate in the challenge

and tell us

your favorite way of studying celebrate

that

you wrote a comment in english which is

not your first

language it’s okay to be happy about

that

it’s okay to share that with somebody

like hey

i wrote a comment in english under a

video and english is not my first

language

it’s okay this is something that will

help you enjoy

english more then do more of what makes

you happy

i tell you all all the time i love

sports i love

exercising i love cooking i love eating

i love these things and i love art so

when i studied korean

i made sure what i was learning was

involved or connected to these things

you need to do the same thing do more of

what makes you happy

find your interests and connect them to

what english

then if you realize that you enjoy

watching tv dramas in english

watch more of them if you realize you

enjoy english podcasts

listen to more of them i have some

students that enjoy reading books like

novels read more again find what makes

you happy and it will result in more

confidence because

you will learn and be relaxed and calm

so later on when you go to speak english

it will come out a lot

faster and easier and finally

watch an english program for fun

that’s right take time to just relax and

enjoy yourself

find an english program currently i’m

watching this is us

now if you’re watching this video and

it’s later on i’m sure you can go online

and find it but for those who are

watching it in real time

find this is us this american drama

it’s good y’all it’s really good it

comes on tuesday evenings

and i’m watching it but i enjoy it but

again it’s in english

but you may also enjoy it watch it for

fun

and you’ll start taking in information

that will help you speak

english with more confidence later

because the information went in

and it was very easy to retain the

information

now here’s the deal i do understand

speaking with confidence is not easy

speaking in english is not easy but i

hope these tips help you to have more

confidence

and to be more comfortable when you

speak in english now that’s all i have

for you today thank you so much for

joining me

remember to speak english but also

remember

to put a comment in the comment section

so that you can be a part of the

challenge

let us know what your favorite method of

studying english

is and i will choose one winner and that

individual will get a 60 minute

tutorial session with a cambly tutor

all right okay guys i’ll see you next

week have an

awesome day and as always remember to

speak

[Music]

english

you still there you know what time it is

it’s story time

hey i said it’s story time

all right so today’s story is about

a time when i did not feel confident

about my korean speaking ability

so when i was in korea you know i lived

there for almost 10 years and i got to

the point where i was an advanced korean

speaker

but at my church i went to uh a

multicultural church so there were

koreans there and there were foreigners

as in like americans people from africa

people from europe

we all worshiped together and because

that was the case

there were times when they needed

translators now i i never

offered to be a translator even though i

could speak korean remember i told you

i didn’t feel confident at times even

though i could speak so i understand

what you’re feeling

so one sabbath again i’m a seventh day

adventist so i go to church on saturday

and we call it sabbath

so one sabbath uh one of my friends

walked up to me because our pastor was

korean

he spoke english and korean but his

sermons were normally in korean

so one of my friends walked up to me and

said hey tiff and i said hey yeah

she said so we need an extra translator

immediately my heart started pumping my

heart started racing and i started

getting nervous

now i told you i was already fluent in

korean

but for some reason i started to feel

nervous and i wasn’t confident

she said so tiff would you mind helping

us out

i said ah give me a few days to think

about it and i’ll get back

to you she said okay but we really need

your help tiff and your english your

korean is good you can do it

she believed in me remember i said

earlier sometimes

other people’s opinion of you is not

really what you think

my friend was like tiff you speak korean

really well

we know that you’ll do great i was the

one that didn’t feel confident so i went

home

out to my apartment and i prayed about

it and i still didn’t feel confident but

i knew that our church needed more

translators so i said

okay i’ll do it um but i need like two

or three weeks in advance like i needed

to have the script or the sermon in

advance that i could

study it and make sure i understood

everything because i was going to

translate into english

he would speak in korean and then i’d

translate into english

so she was so excited she was like okay

tiff cool

so she put me on the schedule and the

time came for me to be the translator so

she sent me the script well the pastor

sent me the script

and i think it may have been like seven

or eight pages

i spent maybe about six hours

going over the sermon looking up the

words making sure i knew everything

so that i could be prepared remember i

said part of feeling confident is when

you feel prepared so

i made sure that i went over the entire

uh script and

knew the sermon i still didn’t feel

confident though

i was still nervous so sabbath morning

saturday morning came

saw the pastor great guy great guy so he

said hey tiff again all of this is

happening in koreans like hey tiff are

you ready

i said yeah you know it’s praying god

will be good you know god will help so

we get on the pulpit or on the stage in

front and

he starts with saying the prayer and

again my heart is racing

the entire time again on the outside

everyone sees

smiling confidence i say good morning

and happy sabbath everyone i’m just

translating

real time right inside i’m so nervous so

then he continues and he starts to give

his sermon

and again i’m still nervous but all of a

sudden i start to feel a little bit

more at ease in the very beginning i was

thinking

about oh man because i’m looking at the

congregation people that are in the

audience and

i’m like oh my goodness they’re probably

like tiff do you know what you’re

talking about

are you sure like all of these thoughts

were running through my head

but there came a point when i started

realizing that people were smiling at me

i was like wait a minute they’re smiling

so they must be understanding what i’m

saying

i was speaking in korean but it was kind

of like they were rooting me on

and their thoughts about me were good

and not bad

so i started to feel my heart

kinda go a little calmer and i started

to feel more confident

because i realized wait a minute they

don’t think anything negative about me

tiff you can do it i started to

encourage myself like tiff you can do it

the pastor and i started to have a good

time he even went off script

means he said whatever he wanted to say

off the cuff look that one up guys

and i was able to translate in real time

so we got through the sermon

it was a blessing i was blessed the the

audience the congregation was blessed

and at the end you know he walked off he

prayed and we walked off and he said

tiff i really want to thank you so much

for being my translator today

i said oh my pleasure pastor no worries

again he didn’t know that i was super

nervous inside

after that i walked out to where we have

to kind of shake everyone’s hands and

my friends were telling me tiff that was

one of the best sermons i’ve heard in a

long time

your translation was amazing now again

they don’t speak korean

but they were letting me know like tiff

we were blessed you did a great job

and then my friends who did speak korean

and english

walked up to me and said tiff that was

amazing you did a great job

keep going and i felt so much better so

one thing i realized was i didn’t

want to do it at first because i didn’t

feel confident

but i pushed through the nervousness and

i continued

and i prepared and i worked hard and

when i got up front even though i felt

nervous in the beginning

by the end i felt very confident so much

so that

i became a member of the translation

team so i was a regular translator for

our church and that never would have

happened if i allowed my nervousness or

my fear

to hinder me from going up front the

same is true for you you may not feel

confident at times when you’re speaking

english

you may feel like when you try to speak

in english that other people are looking

at you

other people are judging you don’t think

that

instead push forward push through don’t

let your fear and nervousness hinder you

from speaking

english you can do it just like i was

able to translate

from korean to english you’ll be able to

speak english with confidence if you

simply push through

and set achievable goals you can do it

and i believe in you

hope you enjoyed this story um yes i

translated a lot when i was in korea and

i had

many wonderful experiences and many

wonderful people around me

thanks so much guys i will see you next

week remember to speak

english and i’ll talk to you next time