Learn English Peter Dinklage Life sucks but youll make it with BIG subtitles

[Applause]

don’t be frightened

who weren’t a Bennington student ten

minutes before you come up to the podium

hands you a mace

that he made

if you don’t bring it to the podium with

you you’ll never be Bennington

so I would like to thank you Ben for

helping me put the fear of God in the

audience tonight but I have to put it

down cuz I’m an actor and I’m really

weak it wasn’t like a prop but she was

real thanks Ben

oh so now I’m gonna read and I’m not off

book

sorry I might be looking down a lot

Thank You president Coleman Bryan and

Conover

faculty students family alumni some of

whom are dear friends of mine who’ve

traveled all the way from the big city

to see me

hopefully not humiliate myself tonight

and especially thanks to you the

graduating class of 2012

see I as a joke I wrote hold for

applause and I was actually gonna read

that so you kind of killed my joke let’s

let’s do that again mm drop hold for

applause 2012 wow I never thought I’d

see 2012

I thought perhaps the Mayan calendar

would prove correct and the end of the

world would have been the greatest

excuse to get me out of this terrifying

task of delivering the commencement

speech but wait according to the Mayan

calendar here when does the world in

December December 2012 damn okay maybe I

shouldn’t talk to the graduates eager to

start the new lives about the end of the

world okay really really of all the

novelists teachers playwrights poets

groundbreaking visual artists and

pioneers of science you got the TV actor

[Applause]

no and I actually heard you petition for

me oh you fools

you know what for those of you who

didn’t petition for me I would love to

later on talk about the problems in the

Middle East and the the you know the

downfall of the world economy and for

those of you who did petition for me I

don’t have any signed DVDs of the game

of Thrones but I’m happy to talk about

the parallel lineages of the Targaryen

and the Lannisters later at the bar you

see it took all of my strength and of

course a little extra push from my wife

Erica for me agree to agree to do this

because I don’t do this in my profession

I am told by people who know what

they’re doing where to stand how to look

and most importantly what to say but

you’ve got me only me my words unedited

and as you will see quite embarrassing

okay let me think I’m thinking but max I

didn’t read that

that was ad-lib anything what has

everyone and their uncle told me as I

desperately seek out advice on how to

give a commencement address tell them

what they want to hear talk about your

time at Bennington know that there is no

wrong speech I like that one

just keep it brief that was my

father-in-law be brutally honest

tell them how hard it is after you

graduate we’ll get back to that one

just watch Meryl Streep’s commencement

speech at Barnard and you’ll be fine

what did Beckett say I can’t go on I’ll

go on

so even if I don’t burn in your hearts

and minds long after this speech is over

even if I don’t inspire you to reach for

the stars and beyond even if I am erased

from your memory after one glass of wine

tonight where am I going with this I

can’t go on I’ll go on

you know I won’t speak of my time here

like some old fisherman you have already

had your time here you have your own

story to tell but I have to say for me

it did start here in Vermont on a very

rainy night it was 1987 and I was a

prospective student the rain was coming

down so hard it was impossible to see

that I was meeting the person who would

later become my greatest friend and

collaborator a freshman who would 17

years later and introduced me to the

woman that became my wife I’ll call him

Sherm because I do

it was late at night on the road right

there near booth house and despite the

dark night and the heavy rain this place

was so alive the lights pulsed from each

of the dorms now I was a kid from New

Jersey who went to an all-boys Catholic

High School I was four foot something I

mumbled when I spoke I wore a sort of

woman’s black velvet cape

black tights combat boots and a scowl

but here at Bennington I was home

and I have to say it doesn’t get better

let me clarify there are not shinier

more important people out there your

fellow students your friends sitting

around you are as good as it gets 22

years after my own graduation I have

worked with my rainy night friend and

fellow graduate Sherm on countless

productions

he has written in all stages of

development from living rooms to

off-broadway Brooks Ian Justin breath

John Matthews Jim Shawn Hilah Nicki and

the B are all classmates

I shared my time with here and still

work with and I’m lucky to call my

friends we are very spoiled here people

always say to me for such a small school

it seems like there are so many of you

I find that really interesting and I

kind of think that’s perfect we can’t

help it we burn very brightly please

don’t ever stop graduates now when I sat

where you are right sitting right now I

had so many dreams of where I wanted to

go who I wanted to be and what I wanted

to do theater companies I wanted to

start with classmates movies I wanted to

be in directors I wanted to work with

stories I needed to tell it might take a

little time I thought but it would

happen when i sat there excuse me

22 years ago what I didn’t want to think

about is where I would be tomorrow what

I would have to start to do tomorrow and

I graduated in 1991 a great year a time

of resurgence for independent films in

this country a time of relatively

affordable rents in New York City as he

I assumed that I could make a living

writing my plays acting way off off off

Broadway and hopefully one day join the

actors I loved and respected in those

independent films TV oh what no what are

you kidding me no didn’t even consider

that I had much more class than that

much more self-respect than that

soap operas and what I didn’t have

was cash a bank account a credit card or

an apartment I just had debt a big

hungry growing larger every moment debt

so as you will tomorrow I had to leave

beautiful Vermont I packed the life that

I knew with socks and a toothbrush into

my backpack and I slept on couch after

couch after couch after couch at friends

apartments in New York until I wore out

their rent paying roommates welcome I

didn’t want a day job I was an actor I

was a writer I was a Bennington graduate

hmm I had to get a day job I dusted

pianos at a piano store on Ludlow Street

for five months I worked on the property

of a Shakespeare scholar for a year

pulling weeds and removing bees nests I

went on unemployment once but for not

for long I couldn’t handle the guilt

eventually I was able to pay rent for a

spot on the floor of an apartment on the

Lower East Side but my roommate had a

breakdown and disappeared he later

resurfaced in a religious cult I’m

making this sound romantic

it really wasn’t I helped hang paintings

at galleries paintings that inspired

inspire you to think I could do that

and then finally after two years of job

and couchsurfing I got a job in

application processing as a data enter

er at a place called professional

examination services and I stayed for

six years six years longer than my time

at Bennington from the age of 23 to 29

well they loved me there I was funny I

were black no cape no tights I smoked in

the loading docks with the guys from the

mailroom and we shared how hungover we

all were everyone called each other

shorty

what’s up shorty how you doing shorty

also hungover shorty I called in sick

almost every Friday because I was out

late the night before I hated that job

and I clung to that job because of that

job I could afford my own place so I

lived in Williamsburg Brooklyn in it

yeah you say that now

or my kingdom for a time machine yeah

that’s right I lived in an industrial

loft my rent was $400 a month my dream

of running a theater company with my

friend and fellow Bennington graduate

Ian Bell had died I won’t go into those

details but neither one of us had any

business sense and the theater we lived

in it had no heat or hot water we didn’t

smell very good but we had our youth the

youth gets old very quickly you’ll see

so Ian moved out to Seattle and I moved

up to the street to my loft and I still

didn’t have heat in 1993 industrial loft

meant not legal to live there I see I

don’t want this to sound cool and I feel

like it’s sounding cool

but I did have hot water mm-hmm hot

water in my bathroom which a friend of

mine using said bathroom once shouted it

smells exactly like a summer camp in

here it was true for some reason in the

middle of Brooklyn there was earth in my

shower actual earth and then look

mushrooms growing from the earth but I

was safe though the ideal fire control

company was right across the street

where they make all the chemicals that

put out chemical fires I did not fear a

chemical fire I would be okay and all

those chemicals in the air were okay too

because up the street we had the spice

factory they made spices and that just

covered everything up in a nice human

scent I had a rat but that was okay

because I got a cat

his name was Brian no relation

my grandmother had given me a pink

pull-out couch oddly no friends or

recent graduates wanted to crash on my

couch so I put the couch on its end so

Brian could climb it and look out the

window

I had only the one window I myself could

not look out the window it was it was

quite high so I had no heat no

girlfriend what are you kidding me

no acting agent but I had a cat named

Brian who told me of the world outside

and I stayed for ten years

no don’t pity me there’s a happy ending

when I was 29 I told myself the next

acting job I get no matter what it pays

I will from now on for better or worse

be a working actor so I quit my position

at the professional examination services

my friends really weren’t happy about

that because he was so easy to find me

when I worked there work was the only

place I had the Internet this was at the

beginning of the Internet and now I

didn’t have either the Internet or a

cell phone or a job but something good

happened

I got a low-paying theater job in a play

called imperfect love which led to a

film called 13 moons with the same

writer which led to other roles which

led to other roles and I’ve worked as an

actor ever since

but I didn’t know that would happen at

29 walking away from data processing I

was terrified ten years in a place

without he six years at a job I felt

stuck in maybe I was afraid of change

are you my parents didn’t have much

money but they struggled to send me to

the best schools and one of the most

important things they did for me and

graduates maybe you don’t want to hear

this is that once I graduated I was on

my own

financially it was my turn parents are

applauding graduates are not but this

made me very hungry

literally

I couldn’t be lazy now I’m totally lazy

but back then I couldn’t be

and so at 29 in a very long last I was

in the company of the actors and writers

and directors I’d sought out that first

year that first day after school I was I

am by their sides raised the rest of

your life to meet you don’t search for

defining moments because they will never

come

well the birth of your children okay

of course forget about it that’s I just

six months she’s my life is forever

changed and that’s the most defining

moment ever but I’m talking about in the

rest of your life and most importantly

in your work the moments that define you

have already happened and they will

already happen again and it passes so

quickly so please bring each other along

with you everyone you need is in this

room these are the shiny more important

people

sorry it sucks after graduation it

really does I mean I don’t know at least

it did for me but that’s the only thing

I know you you just get a bit derailed

but soon something starts to happen

trust me

a rhythm sets in just like it did after

your first few days here just try not to

wait until like me you’re 29 before you

find it and if you are that’s fine too

some of us never find it but you will I

promise you you are already here that’s

such an enormous step all its own you’ll

find your rhythm or continue the one you

I’ve already found I was walking

downtown in Manhattan the other day and

I was approached by a group of very

sweet young ladies easy actually they’re

sort of running feverishly down the

street after me

when they got to me breathless it was

really they didn’t know what to say or

couldn’t form the words but it came out

that they were NYU freshmen and they

were majoring in musical theater of

course come on there are like science

majors

running after me what musicals are you

doing I inquired well one of them said

looking down at her shoes we aren’t

allowed to be in plays our yet our

freshman year now they were paying a

very high tuition to not do what they

love doing I think I said well hang in

there

what I should have said was don’t wait

until they tell you you are ready get in

there

sing or quickly transfer to Bennington

when I went to school here if a freshman

wanted to write direct and star in her

own musical the lights would already be

hung for her now I tell this story

mm-hmm because the world might say you

are not allowed to yet I waited a long

time out in the world before I gave

myself permission to fail please don’t

even bother asking don’t bother telling

the world you already show it do it what

did Beckett say ever tried ever failed

no matter

try again fail again fail better

bennington class of 2012 the world is

yours treat everyone kindly and light up

the night thank you so much for having

me here

[Applause]