Jordan Petersons Life Advice Will Change Your Future MUST WATCH

the first rule

which is kind of a comical rule is stand

up straight with your shoulders back

you want to present yourself to the

world in a manner that

that doesn’t disgrace you in some sense

that that might be a good way to think

about it and

you don’t want to disgrace yourself

because the consequence of disgrace is

emotional dysregulation more pain less

positive emotion

and so the best way to present yourself

is to stand up forthrightly

and to stretch out you know and to

occupy some space

and to to to you make yourself sort of

vulnerable by doing that because you

open up the front of your body right

but it’s a sign of confidence and that

way people are most

likely to give you the benefit of the

doubt and that’s a good way to start

regulating your mood but not only does

it directly regulate your mood to stand

up

because it’s so tightly associated like

posture reflection is associated with

serotonin and emotional regulation

but also because if you straighten up

and you present yourself in that manner

then other people are more likely to

take you

seriously and that’s another way that

you can

at least give yourself the bloody

benefit of the doubt right

and and and and confront the world in a

courageous manner

and that’s a really good way of also of

of

figuring out how to establish yourself

in multiple competence hierarchies

because one of the general rules of

thumb

about how to be successful is to

confront things that frighten you

forthrightly and with courage

and that’s kind of a universal strategy

for success

rule number two is uh treat yourself

like you’re someone that you care about

you should figure out how you would like

to be treated

like you were taking care of yourself

not how you would like people to respond

to you

it’s more important than that it’s like

imagine you had a child that you really

cared for

and and someone said well people will

treat this child exactly

like you want them to but you have to

figure out what that is and so then

you’d have to sit down for like a month

and you think okay well

how do you want your child to be treated

you don’t want everyone just to be nice

to him you know you want people to

challenge him and

you want people to discipline him and

you want people to tell him when he’s

wrong it’s like

you don’t just want everyone to be nice

that’s that’s pathetic it’s pathetic

there’s no challenge in that and so well

you want to treat other people like you

would like to be treated well then you

have to figure out how would you like to

be treated

and well you’d like people to fawn all

over you and just lay everything at your

feet it’s like no

that’s that’s not something you’d wish

for for someone that you were taking

care of

and then then there’s an additional

problem which is it’s often the case

that people will treat other people

better than they treat themselves that

happens extremely

frequently so one of the things i

pointed out chapter two was that

if you have a dog and you take him to a

vet and the vet gives you

your prescription medicine you’ll go buy

the medicine and you will give it to the

dog and you will do it properly

but if you go yourself to a doctor and

you get a

prescription there’s one that there’s a

30 chance you won’t even pick up the

medication

and if you do there’s a 50 chance that

you won’t administer it to yourself

properly and so i really thought about

that when i first came across that

statistic it really it was another one

of those little facts i thought what the

hell’s up with that it’s like

you’ll do it for your dog so obviously

you’ll do it for something you care

about and you’re conscientious enough so

you’ll actually do it so like

why wouldn’t you do it for you your dog

likes you you know even your dog would

rather that you did but but you don’t

you don’t

and and it’s actually one of the reasons

that modern medicine doesn’t work nearly

as well as it could because people just

don’t take their medication

and it’s not only because they don’t

take care of themselves there’s some

skepticism about doctors but

you could be just as skeptical about the

vet

in rule two it’s a bit of a meditation

on why people don’t like themselves very

much

and i think there’s two reasons really

and one is that we’re

we’re fragile and damageable and

imperfect

in multiple dimensions all the time and

that often just gets worse it gets lots

of things get worse as you get old for

example so

it’s not necessarily that easy for a

self-conscious being

who’s extraordinarily aware of his or

her own

fragility and but not just fragility um

foolishness and errors his like you know

yourself better than anyone else knows

you and

you know you you might have a certain

amount of dislike for someone you know

because of something they did but you

know everything you did

jesus that’s a drag man you know you

have to carry that along behind it’s

like really i did that you know

and then so there’s that it’s like

you’re you’re weak and kind of useless

and prone to temptation

and you know all those things you know

that just shouldn’t be that way and then

you’re also capable of pretty vicious

acts of malevolence and so you also know

that about yourself and so

it’s a real existential question for

people like why the hell should you take

care of something as sorry and wretched

as you are

and that’s really what the chapter is

about it’s because the answer in the

chapter is yeah yeah yeah you know

you’re

first of all yes you’re pretty useless

and terrible but so is everyone else and

that’s actually an existential

problem right and what i mean by that

it’s a problem that every human being

has

always had and always will so it’s not

just you

it’s a universal problem and that

there’s there’s an answer to that and

one of them is to

uh what is to say love the sinner but

hate the sin

it’s something like that is that despite

the fact that you’re not all that you

could be

the proper attitude to have towards

yourself is the attitude that you would

have

towards someone that you genuinely cared

for and that it’s incumbent on you to

act as if you genuinely care for

yourself

just like you would act towards someone

that you actually cared about some other

person and so it’s a reversal in some

sense of the golden rule right

and and it’s a discussion of why that’s

necessary and also

more than that it’s a discussion of why

why you have a moral obligation to do

that

it’s not just that you should because it

would be better for you you actually

have a moral obligation to do that i

think because

you make the world a much better place

much worse place if you don’t take care

of yourself

so you should bloody well take care of

yourself you know because

well that’s what the chapters about it’s

partly because you have something

valuable to bring into the world

that’s the thing about being an

individual it’s the thing that western

civilization has always recognized that

as an individual

you have a light that you have to bring

into the world and that if you don’t

bring it into the world

the world is a dimmer place and that’s a

bad thing because when the world is a

dim place it can get very very very dark

and so it’s neces not just so that you

feel better and not just so that you’re

a number one lobster not none of those

things

you need to take care of yourself

because you’re in the best position to

do that

and it’s necessary for you to take care

of yourself despite the fact that

we’re mortal and vulnerable and

self-conscious and capable

not only capable of doing terrible

things but actually do them despite all

that

you you’re still you still have that

responsibility

and so i wanted to you know hit the

question as hard as i can to try to

figure out

why people are have are contemptuous of

themselves

and there’s plenty of reason that’s for

sure but the reasons do not justify

the mistreatment of yourself it’s as

simple as that it’s not a good strategy

and the next rule is make friends with

people who want the best for you

and that’s a meditation on my own

childhood and adolescence to some degree

i had friends who wanted the best for me

and friends who didn’t

and you know they were friends who

some of them were aiming up and some of

them were aiming down and if you have a

friend that’s aiming down and you do

something that’s aiming up then

they’re generally not that happy about

it you know they try to top your

accomplishment with one of their own

hypothetical or real or put down what

you’re doing or offer you a cigarette if

you’re trying to quit and you’ve kind of

done that successfully or a drink if

you’ve

been drinking too much and are trying to

stop being an alcoholic you know

or or yeah they’re cynical and bitter

and

and devoted towards no good and

sometimes that’s family members too and

sometimes it’s even part of you you know

but this chapter is a injunction to

people is like

like you have an ethical responsibility

to take care of yourself you have an

ethical responsibility to surround

yourself with people

who have the courage and and

faith and wisdom to wish you well when

you’ve done something good

and to stop you when you’re doing

something destructive and if your

friends aren’t like that then they’re

not your friends

and maintaining your friendships with

them might not even be in their interest

number four is uh compare yourself to

who you were yesterday

not to who someone else is today see i’d

been taught

as a psychologist that most human

characteristics

were normally distributed right so most

people were average and some people were

extreme that that’s a pretty or a normal

distribution

intelligence is like that and height

there’s more people of

average height than very tall or very

short and weight is like that and

lots of things are normally distributed

and psychologists tend to assume that

everything is but it isn’t

creative products are distributed in a

pareto distribution and that’s a whole

different thing and it’s really

important to know this it’s another

fundamental

fact the knowledge of which can sort of

transform the way you conceptualize

let’s say

the political landscape so here here’s

an example of the pareto distribution

huh

you know there’s a rule of thumb that if

you run a company that 20 of your

employees do 80

of the work or the twenty percent of

your customers are responsible for

eighty percent of your sales

or the twenty percent of them are

responsible for eighty percent of the

customer

service calls same thing but that’s not

exactly the rule the rule is worse than

that

the rule is in a given domain

the square root of the number of people

operating in that domain do half the

productive work

so you think well you have 10 employees

three of them do half the work it’s like

yeah

okay what if you have 100 employees then

10 of them do

half the work

you