Vulnerability Saves

[Music]

over

70 million people worldwide

stutter and i am one of them

but the weird thing is is that i love

public speaking

that’s where it gets a little

tricky i want

to talk to you about how vulnerability

saves

see i become vulnerable with almost

everyone

that i meet because my stutter can be so

unpredictable

for instance i struggle with the letter

t

and my name is

a terrell

because of this my stutter is often

the first impression that i make and the

feeling of

anguish is the first impression

i receive of others

i can see the the agony on your faces as

you

try to hold yourself back from finishing

my sentences

and by the way it’s it’s more than just

finishing my sentences

you are taking my words and making them

yours but i don’t need

to be rescued in fact it’s the

inability for me to hide my

vulnerability

is what saved me

but it happened always see

years ago i had just gotten engaged i

was so excited

and telling everyone and my boss

at the time announced it to the entire

staff

man that was a beautiful day

most congratulated me

but a few of course gave me their

condolences

and then he continues to say how did you

ask her

a fair question right

everyone loves a good

proposal story

but then he he continues to say

and i quote did you say

will you marry me

my heart dropped

see i thought he was was celebrating

with me but instead he was

mocking me

the next 15 seconds felt like

15 hours as they all laughed

it took me three years to quit that job

three years but

that day that i quit changed me it

changed my view

of my weakness i began a journey of

redefining my stutter

after all we all have weaknesses that we

hide or at least try to but it’s hard to

keep

my weakness a secret when it comes out

every time

i say my name

my stutter forces me to become

vulnerable with everyone

that i meet so i needed to embrace it

to begin my journey i felt like i needed

to call out

my weakness to minimize his power

but that’s not being vulnerable no

that’s

being defensive i was

transparent sharing pieces of me in a

controlled way

a part of what i was hiding was anger i

was

angry at the world

for my stutter

it felt unfair i’m smart

likeable even but my stutter crushed

my confidence

one day though i had enough i had enough

and i took

a drastic step ready wait for it

i bought a journal and i pulled out my

fear

anger and resentment in it

this gave me the clarity that i needed

to be my

unpolished and unprocessed version of

myself

but writing in the journal wasn’t enough

nope i needed to do more because no one

would read that

so i took the next logical step for

a millennial i made a youtube video

and i shared how my four year old self

learned that he was different from a

random little girl

in the grocery store

i saw what one act was doing

my vulnerability really was saving

others

see i knew i was changing the way that i

was thinking

but what i hadn’t counted on was the

influence that my vulnerability would

have on others

because i became vulnerable without

hesitation or agenda

it formed a safe place for others to do

the same

we all have weaknesses

and they suck

but our vulnerability saves and when we

find the strength

to be unpolished and authentically

vulnerable we don’t just

change our lives but the lives of those

around us

we realize that we are not

alone hiding our weakness

breeds isolation and loneliness

but redirecting our weakness into

vulnerability

breeds deep community

i mean can we truly connect with the

world if we don’t become vulnerable

no because it is our weaknesses that

allow us to

truly connect

and these weaknesses are our shared

challenges

keeping these challenges to ourselves

breeds isolation

allowing us to live life with closed

hands

but if we become vulnerable

open ourselves up

and open our hands

only then can we save ourselves

and save others

thank you

you