Directing Anger to Build an Advantage

it’s the last time

you were angry in the workplace

my most prominent

memory of anger in the workplace comes

at the end of an all hands meeting

now an all hands meeting is an

opportunity of course for the company to

roll out any

new initiatives to let the workforce

know what’s coming up and in this

particular all hands meeting

the company was rolling out some

initiatives that

some of us employees really weren’t

happy with

the initiative that was being rolled out

really put us at a disadvantage

and we wanted to speak up against that

and when the opportunity came we did

just that

we spoke up and we gave our concerns and

we

asked for some other options to be

considered

like any dynamic leader um

our voices were heard and our leadership

thanked us for our input and

um and the meeting ended just fine

it wasn’t until after that meeting that

it occurred to me or became evident to

me

that the culture we were working in

doesn’t actually

match the message that was given in that

all hands meeting

it was after this all hands meeting that

i was

pulled aside and i was asked

never to speak up in a meeting again

i was told that if i had concerns

i should bring them to my manager

privately

and beyond that i shouldn’t even speak

about it

at my desk in front of my co-workers

the concern was that has us older

engineers

were speaking with each other the

younger engineers would hear

our concerns and have the same concerns

and that was not wanted by

management now in that moment

um i was shocked once i got over

the initial shock of it that’s when the

anger set

in because how dare you have us in this

culture where you make us feel

comfortable

that we can speak up but then privately

you tell us we have no place

we have no voice and

in that moment even though i started to

feel anger i did what i

always did when i felt strong emotions

in the workplace

i suppressed it and i walked away

and as i started to think about this i

realized

we really do learn to suppress our

emotions

at a very young age it was recently

that i heard a friend of mine being

interviewed for a podcast

and in this interview she relayed

being molested in the church at a young

age

when she told her parents what had

happened to her

they corrected her behavior they sat her

down and they gave her instructions

don’t go in his presence alone take

someone with you

if you see him smile and kind of walk

away

she was taught to suppress what she was

feeling

and to placate the aggressor

and this is what we are often taught

as we are growing up none of the the

emotion and the anger that should have

been

directed towards this gentleman that

touched her inappropriately

it wasn’t directed towards him her

behavior was corrected

and in that

she learned anger has no value

my anger has no place in this my anger

will not help the situation

and so many of us learned that at a

young age

we learned that in church we learned

that in school as we’re growing up and

eventually we take this into the

workplace

and a lot of times our workplaces are

places where we want to be positive we

want to bring solutions to the tables

we don’t want problems and and when you

bring your

emotions our workplace cultures don’t

know how to deal with it

now i know many of you will hear this

and you’ll think

that’s really not a big deal i i can

show my emotions at work

it’s not going to result in anything

and for a while in my career i thought

the same thing

even though i did suppress what i was

feeling quite often

i thought it wouldn’t be a big deal

if i showed it

there was a time when when that was

tested and i was proven wrong

um after a long day of work the the work

day was still going

a 5 30 meeting was called 5 30 pm

i still had a couple of hours of work to

do

during the day but we were called into a

meeting

and an hour later of after sitting in

this meeting that really should have

been

an email i left visibly annoyed

i was so annoyed at this meeting i still

had a lot of work to do

and i immediately got back to my desk

picked up the phone

and called a co-worker that i needed to

coordinate with

unbeknownst to me i was followed

back to my desk and as i finished my

phone call

my manager informed me that he followed

me because he didn’t believe

that i would do what i was asked to do

because he could see that i was visibly

annoyed

at that end of that meeting he assumed

i wouldn’t follow through on my actions

in him seeing an emotion that he felt

was

negative immediately everything about me

went out the window

all of my past performance all of my

work history all of my experience went

out the window

and because i showed an emotion

he assumed i would do nothing i wouldn’t

follow through

that conversation quickly took my

annoyance

up to anger and that was the point where

i knew suppressing our emotions

is really detrimental to us

we have got to get to a point where

we’re normalizing

our emotions and and bringing all of who

we

are to the table when we

continue or as we continue to suppress

what we’re feeling suppress who we

are people don’t know how to take

us and they don’t know that even in our

bad days

we’re still going to perform we’re still

going to follow through on our actions

but because they never see it they don’t

know how to deal with it

so what did i do after all this

as i’m going through this anger and

because i’m deciding that

i am no longer going to hide my emotions

in the workplace

i decided to do a little bit of

self-assessment

every time we feel anger we have these

pain points in the workplace it’s an

indication

that something is missing or something

needs to change

and so i took that opportunity to do a

little belly button gazing

and figure out for myself where i needed

to be

what i needed to do what was a value to

me

and doing that assessment i realized

that

my voice is important to me

i have many skills and talents that i

bring to the table

that are never used in my workforce in

my workplace often suppresses

those talents and skills and so i

decided to

take all of who i am and figure out the

best

place to use it that self-assessment is

what led me

to coaching

outside of the workplace coaching

younger engineers it led me to coaching

people to build their business it led me

to building my own business

and ultimately it’s led me to this stage

because my voice is important and my

voice has

value and so because of my

anger and and what my anger prompted me

to do

i put myself

in a better advantage

it was years ago that i heard a

statistic

that said for every layoff we have

in life our chances of having a heart

attack

increases and recently i went back and

found this yale study

that confirmed that and said that after

the age of 40

when you have major disruptions in the

workplace

you’re doubling your chances of a heart

attack

and it doesn’t start at the moment of

the disruption it starts

years before months before that anxiety

that builds up

it’s there and it’s ever present so one

of the things that i found out

as i started to use my talents and my

skills in other places

as i built my own business and as i

started to speak and use my voice

my anxiety in the workplace went down

i no longer got as angry

when things started to happen in the

workplace

because i no longer felt

fully invested in that workplace such

that if something were to happen

if i were to be laid off if something

went wrong where a manager

felt like i wasn’t going to perform

because i had an emotion because i

showed i was human

because i have been doing all of these

things

the the anxiety lessened

and this is what i want for all of us i

want for all of us to get to that point

where we’re prepared where we’re ready

where we

are advantage so that when something

happens

in the workplace when we need to leave

when we need to have that breakup

it does not take everything away from us

and at the end of the day that’s

really what makes us advantaged

and so this is just the start of the

conversation

where will you take it from here