You Have The Chance To Be A Hero For Autistic ChildrenTake It

if there’s anything

in this world that i really really love

it’s fiery english mustard i put it on

everything if i have a bacon sandwich

there’s always a lovely spread

of english mustard on it roast meat

pork pies i even put it on potatoes

and like every motivational speaker or

storyteller i had a very

very peculiar day in that i was in a

room

with a hundred people and for the most

part

the discussion was centered upon what

variants of mustard we liked

whether that was dijon whole grain or

the fiery english variant that i love

so well we talked about what foods we

like to have it on

and the future of mustard itself

as a condiment although the day was

tinged with sadness and that there were

two people there

who didn’t like english mustard and i

was completely overwhelmed with feelings

of

sadness that these two people would

never

feel the warm and loving embrace of

fiery english mustard

in their food so i had to do

something i had to dive deep into my

good nature

and come up with a solution and with

very little conversation with the two

people that didn’t like mustard

and even less research i coined the

medical diagnosis of

hating mustard disorder or hmd for short

coining a medical diagnosis simply was

not

good enough i had to come up with a

therapy or support program

to allow these two people to come into

the mustard way

of life so i founded

hmd therapy and what hmd

therapy is is a compliance or

rewards-based system

wherein children can have a chocolate

treat or

time to take part in an activity that

they enjoy

if they have a loving spoonful of fiery

english mustard

in their food i can sense the

bewilderment coming towards me as

on what on earth is he talking about

of course this is an anecdotal story

about how people are unnecessarily

pathologized in today’s society

i’d like to tell the story of one little

boy

that this also happened to so this

amazing little boy his favorite thing in

the whole world to do

what really brought him joy as a small

child

was to line up his toy cars on the

wonder cell

of his parents house he didn’t walk

until he was almost two and didn’t have

as many words

as the health visiting manual said that

he should have had

from those early days these this

wonderful boy

had so many challenges

from the way other people viewed him so

what school would this wonderful little

boy go to

what would be his education would it be

a mainstream school

or a special educational needs school

so an assessment was carried out with

this wonderful boy

and the assessment was done with a

consultant psychiatrist

and an educational psychologist

and a report was generated from that day

and

brace yourselves because i’m going to

read out an excerpt of that report

it says this little boy presents with

aggressive features

and difficulties with other children his

age

given the collateral history gained from

the boy’s mother

and her daily management struggles it

would indicate

that some autistic retardation

is evident despite this

the boy displays literacy and numeracy

topical of a child his age

there are some verbal sequencing issues

that will hopefully resolve with support

outside of a special education school

that little boy is me

and i’ve read out that letter and that

excerpt

many many times and it doesn’t get any

easier

not for the autistic retardation

statement

because back in 1995 that was language

that was in common

medical usage the thing

that strikes me most is that i didn’t

even have a name back then

i was just the boy and my soul mate my

best friend and the love of my life

my mother aimer is simply the boy’s

mother so i went to mainstream school

i had a classroom assistant with me

pretty much everywhere i went

i didn’t always go to school every day

and i had more opportunities for

individual work throughout the school

day

and my earliest memory of school was

standing in the playground

just holding my teacher’s hand looking

at the chaos that was unfolding around

me

there was there were kids kicking a ball

around in this direction

there were kids chasing each other over

here other kids playing hopscotch over

there

and i just didn’t really know where my

place was

within all of that teachers

and classroom assistants all through my

education

always wanted what was best for me and

their hearts

were always in the right place

however whenever i used to line things

up

or stack things up that was deemed as

inappropriate play whatever that is

and i was the one that had to change

i used to repeat things under my breath

to learn to communicate that little bit

more effectively

although that was deemed as a lack of

communication skills

but yet i was the one who had to change

i didn’t always like working in groups

or

sitting down in a seat for too long and

i was always deemed to have per social

skills

again whatever they are and i was the

one

who had to change although with my

schooling

it wasn’t all bad i did have some real

hero teachers along the way one of them

whenever i was nine

it was clear that i had a reading age

that was more advanced

than my biological years and any time

our class were reading a book together i

was always first to put up my hand

and volunteer to read aloud to the rest

of the class

and my teacher mr bradley had the best

idea and that he put me forward to be

the narrator

of our school play that year and i

remember standing on the stage

and looking out into the audience and

seeing my mom and dad’s eyes just glazed

over with tears of pride

that their champion was on that stage

showcasing what he was good at

that planted the seed for greatness

and without that experience i probably

wouldn’t be on this hallowed

red dot as i am now i did have another

hero teacher two years later

whenever i was 11. this was my final

year of

primary education and we went to an

outdoor activity center

and garden and county donegal

and we were split into two teams as a

class and

the object of the day’s activity was to

build a raft

to take part in a race across a lake

so we got down to building our raft

and then i approached my teacher and

said

mr gill can i build this raft myself

everybody else is just getting in the

way and i think i would do a much better

job

if given the time and space to do so

myself

and against the grain my teacher

actually agreed

he said you know what fella go ahead you

build that raft

and my teacher uh took my classmates and

now

unemployed raf builders away to play

another game and

went off-site to let let me build this

raft

and let me tell you my raft

was a beauty it was made out of barrels

logs it was bound together with rope and

i even made a sail out of

old plastic bags so i dragged my

creation down to the lake

and got my sailors back on board

and the race rang out across the lake

and 20 seconds later

my my binding came loose my barrel

started to separate and my raft

ultimately disintegrated with my raft

my sailors and i scattered across the

lake whilst my team

the other team sailed effortlessly to

the other side

so what is the main message of that

story

let me tell you it’s pick your battles

children and time will inevitably learn

life’s key skills and tasks

not all at the same time but at their

own

pace which has to be supported by

everyone

what i took from that experience was

that in time

i would need to work as part of a team

and even lean on others

for support so what are the main

takeaways

from this talk the first one being

whether you’re a parent or a teacher or

a professional

you have the chance to be an autistic

child’s hero

take it we have passions we have talents

and if they are nurtured at every cost

wonderful things will happen all you

need to do

is look at almost every field of human

endeavor

there has been an autistic person there

and thereabouts

through every single field we have a

wonderful team

and i always say that without us the

human race would probably still be

living in caves

and spearing fish the second one being

the second takeaway

is that people are naturally different

what we need is a model of acceptance

and understanding

the current model the way it stands not

just here where i live

but globally is that there is so much

money invested

by governments and medicalized type

programs

that the main outcomes are treat

diagnose cure

and it obviously doesn’t work because

the life expectancy

for autistic people like me is only 36

to 54. so now as a 30 year old

it’s coming to the stage where people

like me die

on average so something has to change

the amount of referrals waiting lists

for assessments and everything else are

only ever increasing

whilst on a separate graph governmental

funding for

such projects and charities and causes

are still increasing why on a global

basis

for autistic people like me are people

pulling the same lever

and expecting a different outcome

the model that we need as a model of

acceptance and love

which is neurodiversity wherein people

are

free to be who they are without fear of

judgment

the third and final takeaway is even if

people

don’t like mustard or are not like you

be a champion for them too be an ally

every day is a learning day for me and

i’ll leave you with this

from my literary soul brother

zarathustra

whenever he said i am a wanderer and a

mountain climber

zarathustra said to his heart it’s clear

that i don’t like the planes and it

seems i can’t sit still for very long

but no matter what life throws at me as

fate and experience

will involve both wandering and mountain

climbing

thank you very much