A Crisis Called Inhumanity

[Music]

hi

my name is anish kwanim and the thoughts

you’re about to listen to

are my thoughts and do not reflect those

of the world at large

yet when maria broke down at a community

policing event

and suggested that she was this close to

taking her life

we realized we have to also work with

the connectors that were leading to that

thought

not only did we provide maria a place at

our police station to study

but the officers tutored her lifted her

spirit

and also ensured that the domestic

disturbances in her home

were addressed by referring her parents

for gainful employment

and therapy versus adding to the already

raised decibels

and agony maria was the first to wish me

luck

for this talk that i present today

official data and statistics suggest

that 800 000 people die

to suicide every year break that up and

that’s a death

every 40 seconds of every day to that

one person who has died by suicide

another 20 have fortunately had a failed

attempt

to those 20 who had a failed attempt

there’s hundreds and thousands at the

edge this very second

considering taking their own life i

believe we are nearing three times those

vital seconds into this talk

and we can sadly say a prayer to a few

souls somewhere in the world

who we have just lost to suicide if that

hasn’t raised an alarm

let me regretfully inform you that these

statistics i mentioned

are pre the pandemic let me also add

that by now most of you

have noticed my tattoos and have

considered possibly compartmentalizing

or labeling my personality hold on to

that thought

its relativity will soon follow did you

also know that ten and a half

million people in the world are in

contact with our criminal justice

systems

which means over one crore people are

either locked away

pending a trial or have been convicted

and placed under confinement in a jail

or a prison

did you also know that of the number of

people who are eventually released from

such lockups

over 81 percent of them are likely to

return to that very confinement

at some stage again a term we call

recidivism

or an easiest of terms a community’s

failure

to give someone a chance to undo the

wrong and rehabilitate

through opportunity let’s move to the

courts and the legal systems

did you know that india alone has close

to 37 million cases

being handled by legal professionals

this very second

why is there so much of dispute

discontent and disharmony

where is this human crisis coming from i

could go on and on about such numbers

and data

but that will only be delaying my

message let me conclude these facts by

mentioning

that the ratio of professional help

available for humans in crisis

versus our population is truly at an

imbalance

the very word crisis conceals the word

cry

a cry for help when something goes

terribly wrong

this cry is a symptom of pain and

problems in the communities we live in

a symptom which most of us tend to miss

or ignore before it spreads

and requires addressing where we live

where we are raised and where we rise

is the very environment where someone

else is failing

one summer evening as i sat alongside

the officers at the local police station

we received a call from a mother in

distress we went over and learnt that

her son was harassing her

the neighbors had a similar complaint

and so did the onlookers

i sat myself down on the floor besides

this boy whom i’ll call bob

and followed the basic principle of two

ears and one mouth

and began to listen to his crisis my

choice of using tactical empathy

helped de-escalate the situation almost

immediately

at that very moment i had a choice of

handing over an intoxicated and a

troublesome bob to authorities

but i chose to use that very power to be

there for him

and take him past the criminal label i

saw opportunity

whilst others saw sympathy as time went

by bob visited me often and evolved into

a fine young man

in fact he even called me recently to

tell me about a job opportunity he

received

and thanked me with a hug for helping

keep his record clean

and also uniting his family i don’t take

credit for bob’s restorative path

but instead i wonder why it ever reached

me when a family

a neighbor and onlookers could see its

escalation

where was bob’s community when he needed

them the most

none of us can choose our place of birth

in fact nor could i

and destiny so had it that i too was not

to be welcomed into my

own family business after completing my

eligibility

i was left stranded and rejected

wondering why one of my own

had left me to the unknown it was on

that very day

that i decided to commit my life to

community and ensure every home

has a family from coming this close to

walking the plank

a voice repeated that we all have a

purpose i set out to be thankful for my

gift of life

by expressing my gratitude through my

deeds

life is such that we are allowed to take

our emotions hostage sometimes healing

and dealing are nature’s own medicine

to such crisis situations we are all

human after all

however negotiating past this crisis is

a skill we must learn

or seek to learn there is a hostage

negotiator inside

each of us that’s negotiating a journey

called life

every day cherish each negotiation

you’re either learning

or unlearning either ways you’re

learning a myth exists

it doesn’t cost you anything to love and

be kind if that’s true

then why is it easier for us to say what

we want when we want and abuse the

freedom of speech

by not understanding the impact of its

reach kindness and love require effort

but that effort is preceded by the

willingness to want to

rather than have to and as this talk

progresses i’ll attempt to elaborate

that effort

or rather the commitment a quote i

commonly hear

it’s not about what you say but how you

say true to an extent

however most of the time it’s also about

listening and understanding the other’s

perspective

by stepping out of your own shoes rather

than saying anything at all

unless it’s active and participative

listening

the very word you if i may abbreviate

into why for yourself

or for ourselves and you for the unknown

explains our

individual presence in community

understanding this abbreviation

is a fundamental to community service

taking care of you

confirms your own ability to secure

yourself and thus makes you

approachable to others taking care of

ourselves confirms your ability

to manage your immediate and known

community such as your family

friends neighbors and thus makes you

approachable to the unknown

taking care of the unknown that is the

community you don’t know

but can get to know or unknowingly come

in contact with

every day such as the ones who pass you

by or your year off

confirms your holistic approach to

humanity sadly

none of us abbreviate the word you and

go by the good old-fashioned why

or you or if i were to say it me to

understand humanity we must first begin

by humanizing ourselves

and the badges we wear on our heart and

our sleeves we play

different roles every day one morning an

officer informed me of a repeat offender

whom i’ll name jack jack had been often

challenging the law prior to my arrival

in that community

and no one was able to understand why

when i asked jack if i could be there

for him he was amazed

apparently everyone was suggesting

rather than allowing him

to tell his side of the story jack told

me that he dearly missed his grandmother

who had sadly passed away a few years

ago and ever since then

every opportunity relationship decision

and step he took

was with the fear that he may lose

something as precious again

and jack’s possessive responses were

coming across

negatively again i saw empathy and

opportunity

over sympathy i wore the badge of his

family of a friend

and possibly even of his grandmother to

help him today

jack is one of our proudest community

members and assist others in distress

i’d humanize my badge and in turn

humanize jax too

we sleep in the confinement of our four

walls knowing

we’ve gotten through our day but there

are many outside our home

that aren’t as fortunate listeners let

me remind you

that nobody is born a criminal every

crisis has its own story

we sometimes meet people on the worst

chapters of their lives

and label those very chapters as their

journey

when i was conferred with the badge of a

hostage in crisis negotiator

i quite naturally was very excited to

play my role

in responding to people’s crisis but

time made me realize

how cursed i was to only be there for

someone on the worst day of their life

rather than an attempt to ensure that

that day could have possibly

been avoided in community conversations

i was often asked about some of my most

interesting interventions i had a few

but i wasn’t proud of that fact

of course maintaining my community’s

privacy was also imperative

and less productive indeed i was a

crisis responder

but why couldn’t i be a crisis eraser

the word why to me was magical and i

wanted to ask the question why before

rather than after i often stared at the

crime charts at the police station in

dismay

unfortunately the department’s success

was measured by detection

and registration rather than prevention

i also wondered if we were actually

making an impact with such responsive

policing

were we alienating our approachability

through such

interactions i realized that success

meant

arresting a person or for punishing a

troublemaker

or for recovering a stolen item rather

than any efforts we took

proactively to ensure peace i realized

that we fancied a front page story with

the offender

rather than a picture with him and his

family on a happier day

irrespective that chart was answering my

bike and i was committed to erasing

those numbers

i used that data to go back to my

community and targeted those very

beginnings

of those very chapters that were chalked

on that chart

i was able to understand the grass roots

of the community crisis

and started working towards the real

change

no i didn’t just want to meet people on

their worst day

why couldn’t i meet them on their best

day or if not their best

then maybe this connection would have

possibly unearthed a crisis

that was somewhere in queue no effort

to build relations goes a waste and

whilst i

also waited to respond to a crisis i

grabbed the opportunity

to know my community better the result a

rapid drop in crime a massive rise in

proactive responses

enhance reactive and rehabilitative

cooperation during and post incidents

and partnerships established like never

seen before did this take effort

you bet it did and was it worthwhile

well you tell me

listeners i share this because it is

important for you all to take back

that if you wish to do for your

community then understand where it must

be done

of course god bless you all for dropping

a meal to a hungry child

god bless you all for helping the

elderly cross the road

but why has it come to that why can’t we

actually target self-sufficiency

and seldom see the day when anyone needs

anyone

we make the time to post our concerns

that read justice for

or we make the time to walk with a

candle or we make the time to protest

our non-acceptance

but has that made a difference to the

root cause no

the number of victims and those accused

are not reducing

the number of suicides are not reducing

and know the candles

are not lighting the path for your

community our community

which makes me wonder if that time which

we made was it progressive

or was it rather regressive it is us who

choose to stick labels of love and hate

on our communities

and to elaborate what i just said post a

talk i gave in a school

to build relations between police

officers and community

a little girl approached us the next day

and told us that she was

bodily shamed for years sadly

the opportunity to help her was snatched

away from us

by one of her own why because our call

to action

seemed rather small compared to the

enormous social shaming

that she and her family would face and

the labels that they would have to wear

for life

labels plastered on them by our own

communities

the girl and her family were petrified

rather

than justified we call someone good and

we call someone evil

and we refuse to understand the fine

lines that distinguish

a non-emergency from an emergency in

fact

we even classify the end of life as a

division between heaven and hell

it’s uncalled for because we can attempt

to bridge

this gap of the people by the people and

for the people suggest

protection of a community’s

constitutional rights yet

why do we wait to enforce the law rather

than protect it

god bless our social workers crisis

responders and mental health

professionals etc

but don’t we all have a role to play to

address this crisis in our community

so girls and boys ladies and gentlemen

what do we do to play our role for our

community

what do we do to make this pandemic a

little less suffocating

what do we do to turn the quarantine

into quality time

and what can we do to develop our own

vaccine to cure

inhumanity here’s a few tips considering

our millennial understanding

let’s turn the influencer mentality into

the influential mentality

let’s not comment but rather commit

let’s replace the screen time

with the yourself ourself and unknown

time let’s replace the emojis

with actual reflections of humanity

let’s replace a like button

with a like action or a dislike button

with a listening option

or a share with a care or a filter with

a happily ever after

when sarah visited our police station

after seeing a post that read

need help we’re here for you it wasn’t

the post that attracted her

but everything posted on our walls both

digital and human

before during and after that made us

approachable

our stories didn’t just last for 24

hours but lasted forever

and deeply embedded in the hearts and

timelines of our community

and that’s where we begin our

self-change

once we program ourselves to be more

positive and approachable

we progress to partnerships the

partnerships we build

then progress to problem solving the

problems we solve

then progress to peace don’t just do

because you master because your social

feeds will look good do because the data

is screaming

what the community actually wants you to

do it’s important to understand that

santa claus naughty list was more

important than his nice list

because that’s where the damage needed

to be addressed

knock on the doors of the known of the

unknown and your own

and double click the moments of

connection till it’s a heart

cherish this digital age and use it to

make

a difference don’t fool yourself with

the term social distancing

we were already socially distancing from

well before the pandemic

by never presencing spread empathy

love and kindness cherish the power to

also

unlearn and make the world your own

positive classroom

the ones who dislike you they are your

most important students

humanity is often going to be a

thankless job

but don’t do it to wear your own medal

do it because the change will enable

someone else to wear a medal

where once they go helplessness and

hopelessness

and thus my listeners as joel osteen

rightly said

life is not too short we just wait too

long to begin

similarly let us now begin to actually

recreate a new normal

by adding kindness to that very life and

wake up

to realize a dream a dream where our

crisis responders

are seldom needed a dream where our

jails and prisons are empty because we

have addressed the criminal instigation

and not the criminal reaction a dream by

the millions and billions being invested

into the afterthought

is rather invested in the root cause a

dream

where the leaders we elect are not asked

what they

do for us but asked what they know about

us thus their agendas are definitive

and not imaginative a dream where we

stop reading the subtitles but rather

look up listen and acknowledge each

emotion

a dream where we police our communities

together and recognize the various

badges of hope

we all wear a dream better philanthropy

is

not merely for our own trophy but to

lift our community

on a pedestal of glory a dream where we

understand that

every individual comes with baggage and

that baggage

must be respected a dream where our

profiles aren’t verified

by our popularity but rather by our

ability to make the voices of our

followers

louder than the clicks of the paparazzi

a dream that to the maths and to the

physics into the chemistry into the

biology

we also teach our rising generations a

subject

called humanity a dream where we don’t

just join a

say no to this day or a say no to that

day campaign

but rather relentlessly contribute and

immerse ourselves

every day to that change we wish to see

a dream

where capes are not just worn by

superheroes but are draped around those

who once valued themselves with a zero a

dream

where our prayers irrespective of our

religion don’t just

ask from god but rather express our

gratitude and deeds

that assist him to play his role a dream

where we value the potential of our own

community

and celebrate their ability to rise to

heights of never seen before capacities

and not lose them overseas a dream where

i don’t just see appreciation to my

content

but rather see you paid forward to your

kingdom through your own humanitarian

wisdom

a dream where through solidarity we help

build

and cross bridges and not erect walls

and leave open ditches

and a dream where my thoughts are our

thoughts

and a community filled with humanity

coexist

to extinguish abolish and demolish

a crisis called inhumanity thank you

[Music]