Resilient by Design

i invite you to journey with me

through four very different character

story lines

first imagine you are a substitute

teacher

it’s 8 30 in the morning and the bell

just rang to begin the day

you look out at a sea of unfamiliar

rowdy

middle school students wanting to calm

the room

and take roll you notice a student

wearing a baseball hat

definitely against school policy you

call out

young man you need to take that hat off

and put it away for the day

the class goes silent

the student slowly takes off the hat and

looks up

you immediately realize it was not a

little boy

but instead a pale girl with a bald head

next you are a proud parent attending

your daughter’s high school graduation

you and your family feel so excited for

this major milestone

as you listen to the names being called

and all the following cheers

your mind keeps flashing back to the

week before

when you attended a different more

emotional

graduation celebration an even grander

milestone

the flashback is from the pediatric

oncology graduation celebration

for all the patients who had made it

to their high school graduation many of

which you recognize from long days at

the clinic

suddenly you’re back in the auditorium

when you hear your daughter’s name

called on the loudspeaker you watch her

walk across the stage

and your tears of joy are linked to so

much more

the third envision yourself in line at

your favorite local coffee shop

you’re looking up at the menu to confirm

you do indeed want the drink you always

order

you notice a five-year-old boy and his

mother in front of you in line

the little boy is tugging on his mom’s

shirt saying mommy mommy look

he points directly at the barista taking

their order

and asks why does she have so many bumps

and marks on her neck

the barista politely smiles and covers

her scars

the mother of the boy apologizes the

barista responds

no worries your drinks will be up

shortly

this last one will be easy you are you

right here right now take a look at me

what do you see maybe a confident young

speaker

or a happy girl with long brown hair and

fashionable earrings

let me ask you another question

what don’t you see you can’t see

a 24 year old woman who is currently

dealing with fertility

doctors in the hopes of becoming a

mother in the future

she has the egg count of a 45 year old

woman due to the amount of treatments

and

other chemotherapy she has received

since age 11.

have i peaked your curiosity to the

connections throughout these storylines

i suspect you may have guessed by now

the journey i invited you on

is all part of my own story

my name is rachel elliott i’m a

resiliency speaker

advocate young professional proud vcu

graduate

and three-time cancer survivor

i’m here today to share my story of

adversity with the hopes you will see

through gratitude positivity and

compassion

you have the choice to view all

obstacles in life

as an opportunity to become a more

resilient human

as a sixth grader in the spring of 2008

i spent three months in the pediatric

intensive care unit

with a flesh-eating bacteria called

necrotizing fasciitis

the team of doctors was without any

clear understanding how a seemingly

healthy 11 year old girl

could get so sick they performed

countless

inconclusive tests but ultimately i made

a miraculous recovery

and was discharged throughout those

three months

the doctors guessed it may have been

cancer but it wasn’t until july of that

same year that i was diagnosed with

acute

lymphoblastic leukemia

it was actually a relief to some degree

as now we understood more of the medical

puzzle

and how my immune system could have been

so suppressed that i contracted the

bacteria

the diagnosis led to a two-year

treatment plan full of chemotherapy

fearful hospital stays spinal taps

and of course hair loss

but ultimately it was the beginning of

my journey to finding inner resilience

eckhart tolle says life will give you

whatever experience

is most helpful for the evolution of

your consciousness

as an 11 year old cancer patient this

quote hung in my hospital room and i

stared at it every day

these words were the tool that helped me

realize that through this diagnosis

i had the power to become a stronger

version of myself

and although not always easy i even

began to find

moments of gra to be grateful for the

opportunity to evolve with this

challenge

acceptance and gratitude are the first

component in my resiliency formula

i want to be sure you hear this

important aspect of the process

i first chose to truly understand and

then accept

the challenge being presented which led

to me finding gratitude

every day throughout those two years of

treatment brought new challenges

some days i was mad others incredibly

sad

and some too weak to feel anything but i

was on a mission

i finished the two years of treatment

was able to enjoy my high school years

cancer-free i graduated and headed off

to the college of charleston in south

carolina

i remember being so grateful to attend

my high school graduation

in the winter of 2015 after five years

in remission during my freshman year of

college

i noticed some unusual bruising on my

legs

i went to the school clinic for a blood

test

and the results showed something was off

additional testing confirmed the

unthinkable

the cancer had relapsed

just like that in a split of a second i

withdrew from school

rushed home to my team of doctors at vcu

and began a more intensive

two-year treatment plan i remember being

so

angry thinking how is this my reality

but i had learned the lesson before and

knew it was important to feel that pain

but staying in the misery was not the

answer

so i focused on what i could control my

attitude

i found moments to be joyful i had epic

water bottle flip challenges with my

little brother

i playfully joked with the doctors and

nurses about how lucky they were to be

seeing me every day again

i created a leaderboard for all my uno

wins

during long days at the clinic and i got

a new puppy

a bernice mountain dog named toby

being optimistic even when i was

struggling helped shift my perspective

choosing to adapt and positivity are the

second component in my resiliency

formula

and as you will see i sure needed it

in may of 2015 just two months into that

relapse treatment plan

i found myself back in the icu

a team of doctors had identified

multiple bacterias and viruses in my

blood

i was put into a drug-induced coma and

on a life-saving machine

called ecmo that took over the function

of my heart and lungs

after i woke up from the coma i spent

the next 100

days in the icu regaining my strength

learning to walk and ultimately giving

my body the time it needed to heal

from all the infection

it was the summer time and all i wanted

was to be out of the hospital

i set a goal to be home by my birthday

august 21st

every day i replaced the thoughts of

this isn’t fair why is this happening to

me

with the joy i felt from the little

milestones

being able to sit up taking a sip of

water

taking one step then 10

then walking a hundred yards

i focused on how far i had come and my

ultimate birthday wish

came true

the chemotherapy and other treatments

did get rid of the cancer but it is also

what caused my immune system to be so

weak

and how i got so sick i chose to end the

chemo protocol at the time

because no cancer cells were present i

spent the next several months

continuing to recover and resume normal

life

i transferred to vcu and took online

classes towards my college degree

i got a part-time job at the local

coffee shop

and i even ran a 10k

i had no idea i would have to deal with

yet another relapse

in october of 2016 the second relapse

happened

at this point my learned grit must have

kicked in as i was

truly unsure how i was going to do this

all over again

it was the sheer positivity and

acceptance that i had been practicing

since age 11

that allowed me and my family to take a

deep breath and go about researching a

better way to combat this disease

i was truly blessed to be enrolled in an

immunotherapy clinical trial at the

children’s hospital of philadelphia

the three months of treatment were

mostly outpatient

and much less invasive than the previous

ones

which allowed me and my family to enjoy

the holiday season

in a philadelphia hotel

cart t-cell gene therapy is the process

of taking one’s own t-cells and

modifying them in a lab

they are then re-injected into the body

and immediately attack any cancer cells

brilliant huh immunotherapy is an

emerging pillar of cancer treatment

i was again cancer free in january of

2017

and i’m proud to report that i am in

what i refer to as

forever remission it was this stage of

the journey that i truly began to

understand the third component in the

resiliency formula

compassion the struggles i faced

allowed me to feel for others who were

also struggling

often more than myself like the children

and parents i met at children’s hospital

philadelphia who are dealing with

chronic

lifelong illnesses or the many women who

have dealt with the emotions of

childbearing attempts

and painful fertility drugs even back to

the substitute teacher

and the little boy in the coffee shop i

can choose to understand they had no ill

intent

she didn’t know that i had special

permission to wear a baseball hat at

school

nor had the little boy ever seen a trach

scar

i can choose to see from their

perspective and not take any of it

personally

sharing compassion and understanding in

turn

allowed me to heal and become more

resilient

my story is of course unique to me but

you too have dealt with many obstacles

in life

as well as the collective challenges we

are all facing today

in life adversity is guaranteed but we

have the choice to focus

only on the negative heartbreaking

aspects

or discover ways to grow and evolve

to identify where we want to be and

strive towards it

i believe my resiliency formula is

universal and it does not take three

cancer diagnoses to implement

you can use it to help navigate any

challenges that come your way in life

i invite you to grab onto these

practices of gratitude

positivity and compassion they have the

power to shift your perspective

and make you a more resilient human by

choice

resilient by design thank you