Flexible Journey How Embracing Growth Changed My Life

there are some great new year’s eve

traditions out there

but mine doesn’t center around midnight

or fireworks

or a group celebration my favorite

is to compose my end-of-year journal

entry

i write in my journal throughout the

course of the year but those first 364

days

it’s all dedicated to small events

little happenings basically something

for the archives

it all builds up to that last day though

when i get a chance to

encapsulate and summarize a year of life

how did i grow and change who did i meet

what new places what new experiences did

i get to take in

all those things come together on

december 31st for me every year

and every entry has its own theme and

its own impact they’re all special to me

but there’s one in particular that

stands out and that came

on the final day of 2018. it was a

beautiful morning i was actually home

for the holidays

and it was still quiet out in the woods

i went for a walk found a bench

fog was still coming through the trees

the only sound out there was this little

creek

ambling through the evergreens and it

gave me time to think

and reflect and while i was out there

amongst the green and the trees and the

peacefulness

i came to this epiphany

no matter what it may seem like we don’t

stop growing

not now not tomorrow not next year

maybe not even until we leave this earth

and i got there after thinking about all

these times earlier in my life

where i thought i had i had found the

finished version of me i was done

growing the

person i was today is the person i’ll be

in 50 60 70 years when i go to the grave

i realize the stupidity in that pretty

quickly time went on another couple

months maybe a year

passed and then i did find the finished

version of me

yeah i’m kidding it took another couple

cycles for it to finally hit home

that it really wasn’t going to happen

now or anytime in the future so that

morning

the last day before we turned the

calendar over to 2019

i changed my mindset altogether instead

of looking for the finished version of

me

or trying to find that end point of

growth i not only accepted

but embraced the idea that growth is

perpetual

and that it offers us all these

different avenues and branches

and frameworks to look at life through

and that is what makes it exciting

but let me take you even further back to

contextualize why i was in the mindset

of growth

and change rebirth transformation all

these things

i was a baseball broadcaster at the time

i spent seven years calling action in

collegiate wood bat leagues and

spent some time in the minor leagues as

well took me all over the country

it was a blast it was my dream job come

true

i was a kid in seattle growing up at the

age of five six

seven listening to mariners games every

night with the hall of fame voice of

dave niehaus narrating the action for me

and i wanted to be him and starting my

senior year of high school pretty much

every action i took directly indirectly

somewhere in between

was in search of accomplishing that goal

it didn’t matter to me that i was

missing family events and social time

and vacations

because i was doing not only what i

loved but for me

what i figured was my calling my destiny

my thing in life and that was something

i had looked for for a long time

see growing up the people i admired the

most the ones i saw the most success in

were the ones that had consistency they

had the same job their entire lives

they lived in the same place their whole

life

maybe they still had the same friends

that they had

in kindergarten all those things

inconsistency translated to success for

me

and so having baseball as that thing i

loved and could be happy with for years

and years and years

equaled success and everything

was great until it wasn’t

in the fall of 2018 i started hearing

a little noise coming from right around

here

this red pumping thing mine’s right

about here

you can check for yours i promise you

it’s there though we all have one

mine had been whispering me to me for a

long time that i wasn’t quite as happy

as i thought

and you see it was hard for me to listen

because i got so accustomed to listening

to the pink squishy thing up here you

know the one that has logic and sense

and

has a lot of security to it so when this

guy was trying to

holler at me feelings and emotions and

uncertainty was really hard to listen

but i remember one night specifically in

the fall of 2018 this guy got

so loud he was out shouting this one

and he was saying the reason you need

change

is you want something more out of life

you want to make a difference for others

with your work you want to contribute

positively to their lives

and he was right i wasn’t doing that

in baseball i wasn’t doing that anywhere

else in my life

and it took a lot of guts a lot of

courage to even

take a listen to what was being said and

i’ll tell you this

just by opening my ears to what was

coming out of here

made me feel like a failure

i felt like i was failing myself my

family

my friends co-workers even the strangers

that would tune in

to listen to the games i was calling

what were all those people going to

think

when i gave up my consistency and

happiness and success

to listen to feelings and emotions and

uncertainty and take a risk in life

naturally i thought it over for quite a

few months i did have to use a little

bit of this guy along the way but i

didn’t tune this out

this was a big part of me and at last

i decided the change was going to be

made i was going to leave

baseball and pursue firefighting

talking about sports running into

burning buildings

a bit of a difference it was terrifying

it was mortifying to think

that i had been on my track i had found

my thing my calling my happiness

and all of a sudden i was going to take

this leap of faith

and go elsewhere but i listened to my

heart

i made that leap and then i started

listening some more

you see where i was living at the time

when i made this decision

was a place that was not good for me i

was there because that’s where work was

this guy started to say take a look

somewhere else

i found fort collins colorado in the

fall of 2019.

this guy led me here and it’s one of the

best things that’s ever happened to me

you know what i listen some more

remember how i told you i wanted to go

into firefighting

i did i started at least part of the

training for that

was to get a certification as an emt and

while i was going through that process

he started yelling again out screaming

this guy

saying this is what you want to do

contributing to medicine contributing

directly to patients instead of running

into buildings and rappelling out of

windows

is how you can make your biggest impact

on others

so i listened again rediverted myself

to becoming an emt and recently got my

first job doing exactly that

and it felt so good to listen i kept on

doing it some more listen to my heart

when he was

asking me who i really was what values

were truly important to me

and what stuff maybe was a facade i was

putting up to either convince myself

or family or friends that i was happy in

my old way of doing

things but continuing to listen

down here it’s more than just

by the way he’s got some good stuff to

say

it all rejuvenated me and energized me

and it’s changed my outlook on the

future

even looking into the next couple years

where i’m currently at as an emt

the next step for me is to look into

becoming a paramedic and it’s something

that’s really exciting to me

but get this there’s a walden university

study out there that says the average

length of a paramedic career

fits on one hand it’s four years

now the old me would be freaking out

right now probably would have never even

started this venture

knowing that the length of my next

career

would be the same as my time in high

school

but the new me is kind of excited

because after potentially four years and

maybe it’ll be one maybe it’ll be 14

but whenever that time ends another

chapter gets to begin

and that’s how i see life in general

it’s this big story

with a lot of great chapters i love to

read my favorite books don’t have

three chapters they have 53 83

103 whatever it may be and each chapter

gives you a chance for new opportunities

new directions

new hope new outlooks on life

and that’s what excites me going forward

as well it’s not just career based

either

i think to the future when i get married

and have kids buy my first home

maybe move again change careers again

experience

new foods new cultures all these things

those are all

chapters i can add to this great story

of life that i’ve been writing

and it’s all centered around listening

here

instead of here there’s room for both

but by not muffling this guy anymore and

giving him some air time

it’s drastically changed my outlook on

life

and i hope the same can be true for you

no matter where you are

who you are what you are in life there’s

always time to stop

and listen and maybe make a change so

whether you’re in middle school or high

school right now maybe on the younger

side and

getting ready to take on the world of

adulthood and find your career and find

your pathway find where you want to live

go for it but if you feel the need to

change

once or twice or 32 times

as long as you’re giving this guy a

listen go for it

you know i was 24 when i started this

whole

rejuvenation maybe that’s you maybe

you’re already in a career

searching for a way to really make this

happy instead of just this

maybe you’re 34 maybe you’re 64. the

point is

it’s never too late to listen to what’s

coming from here

because this is your lifeblood it truly

is what keeps you going

and it knows you better than anyone it’s

been with you

since day one so stop

and give it a listen and i wish you all

the best

with the journeys you two can take

together because i found

the joys and the beauties in listening

and letting life take me where it can

and i hope you can do the same thank you