Man Up

[Applause]

so i know everyone’s been talking about

really deep

meaningful stuff so let’s talk about

something very shallow

me hi

[Laughter]

hi i just thought i’d introduce myself

see so like

um i’m the head of strategy at the

communications agency

uh i’m a published author i’m a skater

i’m a swimmer i’m a cyclist

i’m a skier i’m a wake boarder i’m also

a serial party boy but don’t tell

everyone

i live in a pretty nice house it’s been

featured in magazines all over the world

i drive a pretty nice car i’m a pretty

good home chef

and i’m an occasional advertising model

so my big question after that incredibly

wanky introduction

am i a man well thank you for that

resounding

nothing but usually people would say yes

thank you very much

now let me tell you something else i

collect barbie dolls

like lots of barbie dolls like 12 000

barbie dolls i’ve got 12 000 barbie

dolls in my

little singaporean house

in fact it’s the largest collection in

asia it’s in the asia book of records

so now my next question then is am i

still a man

thank you so there’s no point to this

anymore okay bye

now i just got to talk to you a little

bit about barbie barbie tells

us that you can be anything and that’s

been her tagline for a while

she herself has had like 200 careers and

she’s been around since like 1959

uh and when i was a kid uh i’m sorry

i’m sorry but when i was a kid i wanted

to be a fireman

um not so much a fireman but all the

traits that were associated with fire

manism which is like courageous and

brave and

strong and handsome and then i started

playing with dolls

and you know even even as a five six

year old i did ask myself what kind of

men

would i then grow up to be

so i’m going to tell you a bit more

about my story

my brush with media started at a pretty

young age

at the age of 17 i was a teen journalist

and that was when my collection of 250

dollars by the way

went public and everyone was like oh

okay so he collects dolls oh my god

um and now when you google my name uh

with with the word barbie as a suffix or

prefix you actually get

things like this like it’s it’s an

insane amount of media coverage

globally i believe there are about 300

000 hits

so um and happens like i’ve been i’ve

been i’ve been compared to

smithers which is fun um

um but you know with with internet fame

as crystal belt probably tell you

comes things like this and imagine this

right you

you just like one day wake up and

there’s some media coverage about you

and the next day on yahoo you’re being

called a

you’re being called a homo you’re being

called a crazy rich asian and that’s

used as an insult by the way

um single yeah i wish

it’s it became so talkable that

that even even a magazine in singapore

published this and said the straits

times finally posted about the

singaporean guy who collects barbies

and all the sexist homophobes have

crawled out of their holes

which which is awful i mean like you

don’t you don’t think about these things

because to me it’s a private collection

it’s just

stuff i do in my free time and it

suddenly opened up a floodgate of

of i guess opinions opinions which

may not necessarily be in your favor so

that really got me thinking about the

not so wonderful world of internet fame

uh i myself am a relatively confident

guy

but sometimes i think about my own loved

ones

these are my parents lovely lovely

parents bless them

they they’ve never said anything

disparaging about my collection they’ve

always supported my collection

and then one day right because i’m in

this ad campaign so like

right now if you take the mrt you will

see me on the on the on the train

platform screen doors and whatnot uh and

and my parents were in church one day

and um someone someone asked them is

that your son uh the doll guy

on the ads and they’re like yeah yeah

that’s my son and and this person was

and you’re okay with it and i was like

wait what and i could actually see that

flicker of shame

in my parents eyes parents who never

thought that this was a weird thing

and there was this flicker of shame they

pick themselves up um

but you you you feel it and suddenly you

worry

and you start thinking about the larger

implications of my own

stupid collection i used to defend

myself because you know when you go to

school and they’re bullies or that kind

of stuff you

you defend yourself it’s like this is my

decision i am still a man

but now i understand that my

responsibility is so much bigger

can you imagine right that first of all

i have to defend my choices but i’ve

also got to defend my upbringing my

parents my grandparents my

family i have to defend my partner who

has to live in a ridiculous house

full of dolls with me i have to defend

my friends because my best friend has to

be permanently associated with this guy

that collects dolls

and brings dolls out in public and

photographs them um

it is rather embarrassing i must admit i

have to defend my loved ones

so to me right that that suddenly became

a thing where i have to think about

me being the cause of someone’s shame to

becoming their protector

so i think that that was a lesson in

manhood for me

where where barbie made me into a

protector whether i liked it or not

um i started instagramming as one does

and i’ve got a healthy ish following and

through

instagram i i met some amazing

um but i think it also managed to help

or help other people reach out to me so

i’ve i’ve been helping make a wish

globally for for years and using barbie

to spread the message of happiness and

hope

so i’ve sent like 13 dolls to to brazil

to because this girl had a had a wish um

to have dolls from all over the world

um closer to home this is vivian vivian

has muscular dystrophy

and her whole body does not move but she

loves she loves barbies so

uh what i do with my instagram page is

that i go to a house and i dress dolls

for her and then we do like little

fashion shows and we

put them on my instagram and she feels

like people are watching

which is which is great um yeah so this

is this is vivian’s

not so humble collection it’s got pretty

decent collection actually

i live up a long flight of staircase

and she and she wanted to see a my house

uh which has twelve thousand dollars in

so we we physically had to carry her

into the house

um but you know that that moment where

where her eyes lit up to see something

that she never thought she would see

that was magical for me and i i’m not

someone that cries

uh but it did bring a tear to my eye so

lesson number two i guess from from

barbieism

is that is that i actually went from

being very passive to

being a bit more compassionate i don’t

want to say i’m really compassionate but

i’ve gone to becoming a little bit more

compassionate and understanding of the

world

last point promise i’m going to talk

about sri lanka now i used to travel a

lot pre-covet for

for business and for for leisure and

i was once on an agency transformation

trip in sri lanka where i had to go in

and do coaching for like two weeks

and i was stuck in this hotel and it’s

and at 7 pm there was nothing else no

bars no clubs

and i would eat my cheeseburger and go

to sleep uh i usually have a travel doll

with me

and i used hotel toilet paper

to make a dress for my travel doll

and it kind of looked like this

[Laughter]

[Applause]

and then i instagrammed it and my my

followers my fans were like oh my god

this is so cool and i’m like you know

what i’m stuck here for 14 days i’m

gonna be doing this every night for the

next 14 days just to amuse my audience

and from there right i started making

things like this

out of hotel toilet paper toilet paper’s

like 75 cents i refused to pay for this

so and as you can see the designs became

a lot more elaborate and inspired by sri

lanka inspired by the weddings i saw in

the lobby of mount lavigne hotel

and bandaged dresses that kind of stuff

i even used

the cup cover in the hotel room to make

a hat

that legit is how bored i was uh

and and little did i know that in the 14

days when when i was away

um a singaporean magazine nylon covered

covered it and

and talked about how i made doll dresses

out of toilet paper

and before you know it from it the time

talked about my toilet paper dresses for

dolls

and then before you know it it was in

vogue italy and i’m like wait what

i like hello this is this is my toilet

paper

and and it’s in vogue magazine which is

like insane for me

which then gave me the courage to

publish a book so

besides my day job i can actually now

say that i’m a published author with a

book on

amazon and book depository um just so

you know i launched the book back in sri

lanka

in mount lavinia hotel and and like that

was kind of one of the highlights of my

life

which then led to me having my own

exhibition at mint museum

in in singapore where i also locally

launched the book

which then got me invited to be one of

the the guest artists

at barbie’s 60th birthday celebrations

in conjunction with the singapore tour

and oh by the way and what i did there

was that i tried to make dresses out of

singaporean icons instead so i use the

good morning towel

to make a gown i use singapore plastic

bags the ones we get in the market to

make a gown

and my favorite the chassis rice wrapper

chassis is like my favorite food it’s

even got the rubber band and the

chopsticks that come with the

come with the food um and that got me

into bazaar magazine

and i’m like i’m like wait what what’s

what’s going on this is

this is dolls yo um and and what happens

then is that because of my use of

upcycled recycled sustainable materials

i’m actually now also an official

spokesperson for one of the biggest pulp

and paper companies in the world

to talk about sustainability in

infection

and i continue to do work with them by

creating

dresses out of their tissue paper to

talk about sustainability

like i said when i began this it does

sound

shallow me standing up here talking

about myself

is one of the most uncomfortable things

i’ve ever had to do

um and you know to a lot of people it

may sound like success

but i define success a little bit

differently because success to me right

is the ability to feel completely in

control

of your own life because you’re going to

have to have that job you’re going to

have to have your family and and all

that

but being able to control your whole

life

um to me that that’s something that’s

precious it’s something that not a lot

of us

dare about that i just want to say like

imagine if i hadn’t been that weirdo who

brought the doll on a business trip

none of this none of this this avalanche

of stuff

would have happened if i wasn’t weird

so can you imagine something like that

has managed to shift the whole

conversation and these are words that i

didn’t make up these are words that were

held at me on the internet

from weird to gay as an insult again

that makes no sense but

weird gay hoarder poorly brought up

crazy rage asian loser

and i’ve somehow managed to shift that

whole conversation into one of

craftsmanship

into talent into design into skill

and that’s really you taking control of

your own narrative

as soon as your name goes out in public

um and i

i have to thank passion for that which

was point number three

this whole session has been about the

meaning of you and to be very honest i’m

and i’m still on a journey to becoming a

man it’s it’s not easy

we learn every day and barbie has been

my unlikely companion

but she’s also given me some pertinent

lessons as i as i mentioned

i’ve managed to prioritize protection of

my loved ones in my whole life

i’ve she’s given me some kind of

compassion and i

i say this as an advertising person we

very seldom have compassion

so being able to open my eyes to

people that need stuff it is

it’s huge for me and um barbie has also

allowed me to live with passion

my concluding thought is just know that

it’s okay to be different because you

never know what’s going to spiral from

there

playing with barbie could have proven to

reduce my manhood

if you think about it very logically but

barbie has actually made me into more of

a man than i ever dreamed possible

thank you

thank you so much