The Anatomy of Oppression
[Music]
[Applause]
today i stand in front of you a woman
a woman that’s made a decision to no
longer let the most painful parts in her
body
go untreated medical professionals say
that if a pain lasts longer than three
days
could be abnormal to get it checked out
so today i want to ask you have you ever
received
a bad diagnosis news you weren’t
anticipating
circumstances that left you breathless
having heart palpitations
that’s exactly what happened to me the
moment i began to present
my point of view on the anatomy of
oppression
i’ll be honest i’m not in the medical
field but as a true researcher i wanted
to do my due diligence
so as i put oppression into the search
engine and began to read the text
to my surprise i hadn’t just come across
a definition
but i felt as if i had received a bad
diagnosis
words like abuse neglect
persecution pain and suffering
left me with the conclusion this term
needed to be reevaluated
and today i’m going to do just that i’m
submitting to you my findings
that if oppression is a living organism
when’s the last time we dissected its
parts
it brought me back to a time when i used
to work in retail
if you’ve been there then you understand
it is long hours
long days long nights and tonight wasn’t
any different
after a really long shift a co-worker
and i decided to go
and get a bite to eat we thought that we
would go to our
favorite wing spot because it was going
to be quick fast in a hurry
so as we sat down in the booth reviewing
the menu figuring out what combo we were
going to get
the waitress approaches the booth
and when she did i immediately felt
uncomfortable she looked like my mother
not because she favored her in likeness
but because she was old enough to be my
mother
thought started circulating in my mind
like
why is she here and is this the time
when i tell her that i want the sauce
on the side and the lemon pepper
seasoning i actually don’t like on my
chicken but i love it on my fries
yes i’m one of those
but before i could get out my order she
looked at me
and said honey scoot over
before i could say no i slid myself to
the left and she
plopped down right next to me and when
she did
she let out the biggest sigh
something like a
at this moment i look across at the
booth at my co-worker
trying to read the look on her face it
was something between confused
irritated and she was definitely still
hungry
the waitress said thank you so much for
scooting over she just needed to rest
her feet
that she had actually been working a
double shift and that wasn’t anything
new
that unfortunately after the passing of
her husband
she’s been forced to work double and
triple shifts just to make ends meet
she went on to talk about how much love
there was
between them and all of the memories
that
they had shared but she was devastated
to learn about the amount of debt
that they were in when i think about the
first part of this dissection
i think about the body it’s the easiest
way for me to see if there’s irritation
or infection at least on myself
so when i think about the body of
oppression i think about what it looks
like to me
a list of unfortunate circumstances
situations that may not have necessarily
been our fault
not because we made any wrong choices or
decisions
but we’re left with the traumatic
experiences of our past
and unfortunately the triggers that
follow them
as i sat there a little bit longer just
resting on what oppression looked like
to me
i asked myself the question how has this
diagnosis been allowed to function for
so long
i mean oppression isn’t a new term but
yet this is something that has gone from
woman to woman from city to city from
state to state from country to culture
like it just flowed like blood does
through your veins it brought me back to
the booth with my co-worker
as the waitress gets up to go put in our
order i’m ready i’m like we’re about to
debrief
about what just transpired but before i
could get out my thoughts she definitely
gave me some of hers
she thought that it was super
unprofessional of this waitress to
not only ask to have a seat but to
actually
take a minute and rest her feet she
thought it was inappropriate
for her to sit down at the table with us
as if we were friends
oh and that
that psy that was dramatics
i saw the words coming out of her mouth
but i just didn’t have a response i was
confused
don’t get me wrong i really liked my
co-worker
we shared a lot of laughs but we both
sat in the same booth
listening to the same story
about this woman’s loss of her husband
about the physical
mental emotional and financial suffering
that she was in and yet we came to do
two different conclusions
it made me think that the blood of this
diagnosis
is a misunderstanding of other people’s
traumatic past
it’s the minimizing of their triggers
and unfortunately touching labels to
that misunderstanding
words like inappropriate unprofessional
dramatic i have to be honest with you as
i sat in that booth
i was no longer hungry
i felt helpless for her in that moment
it brought me to one of my favorite
quotes from the late maya angelou she
said
people will forget what you did to them
people will forget what you said to them
but people will never forget how you
made them
feel i stand here over a decade later
remembering how i felt on that day
i remember how i felt when she came over
to the booth and reminded me immediately
of my mother
i remember how i felt when she asked me
to
slide over so she could sit down
and i definitely remember how i felt
when i heard that
that sigh
but more importantly i remember the
response my co-worker had to her story
i remember the lack of empathy and
compassion in that moment
we can blame it on the hunger pains but
it brought me back to my research
i wanted to dig a little bit deeper so i
went to the cells
cells are really important there’s lots
of them two
specifically the white blood cells
primary role is to protect the body at
all cost
protect the body from deadly viruses
toxins
diseases protect the body
where the red blood cells the primary
role is to get
oxygen to our lungs to help us breathe
now that’s important a whole lifeline
so as i sat there doing my research i
asked myself
the question how am i protecting the
body
and have i been the best lifeline not
just to myself
but for everyone around me
today i submit to you an alternative
treatment
because whatever we’ve been prescribed
child it ain’t working so today i just
want to say a little bit more
kindness patience
empathy compassion
a whole lot of love
and dare we not forget
understanding
quickly my research went from definition
to
diagnosis to now a full-on declaration
making a decision to no longer allow the
most painful parts
in our body to go untreated
no longer waiting until that pain and
suffering is unbearable
that we’re busting at the seams
making sure that we are not only being a
lifeline
but we’re relying on our lifelines
one of my closest lifelines asked me a
question
i never thought a question could be
medication but
when these three words were released
from their mouth i
immediately felt an ease
a release of the pain and suffering and
abuse that i experienced in my lifetime
i immediately felt a supportive space
to be able to share and be transparent
and vulnerable about the triggers that i
had picked up along the way
so today i’m going to ask you the same
question
i’m believing that these three words
are going to have a similar effect on
you
walking away knowing that you’re a
lifeline
so today i ask
how’s your heart
i’m kashan milligan thank you
you