Power of a click

several

several years ago really very many years

ago

as my son says during dinosaur era

i had my first experience with my job

interview

and at that time it wasn’t called the

environment interview there were no

announcements nothing like that

it was more of a word of the mouth that

you heard

there is some opening so here i am

hearing that there is a job opening in

one of the us-based organizations in

umri

and i’m getting completely ready for the

conversation

and while i’m going there 18-year-old

girl

with absolutely no work experience but

with

huge desire to work because i needed to

support my education and my family

there were couple of sentences ticking

my mind

first of all everything will be okay

secondly if i do good on the interview

the job is mine

third if i don’t get the job it means

somebody else was much better than

myself

with this very affirmative and very

smart sentences in my head

i entered the room and the guy started

to ask

questions the more i was answering the

questions

the more confident i would become i was

completely sure the job is mine

i mean it like in the movies you see

like the confidence is ticking

up up up and i’m completely sure the job

is mine

but interesting thing happened the more

i was answering the questions the more

angry

irritated nervous the guy would become

and i i frankly i don’t know what’s

going on but with the last

answer to his last question in a very

loud voice

all of a sudden the guy asks me why you

didn’t come

10 minutes earlier i’m like i’m sorry i

came only now

i mumbled something i don’t know what’s

what’s wrong what’s going on

completely ignoring my mumbling he again

asked the same question

even in a higher voice no why you didn’t

come 10 minutes earlier

i already shocked but demanded an answer

okay

what’s wrong and then he tells me

something

which completely crashes me down he told

me

ten minutes before you came i received

the call

from my friend who asked me to hire

a daughter of his friend some city

official

and i promised to hire her so marianna

you did good thank you bye-bye i cannot

hire you

i left the room completely devastated

i was crying the whole way angry at the

whole world

at that guy who at least could have the

courtesy not tell me the truth

at that girl who were good enough to

have some father who would call

but most important i was angry at my

parents

i came home i called them losers

i said you’re losers you don’t know

anybody in this town that at least

somebody would call for

me just two months after that

my university teacher recommended me to

work in peace corps

and the experience to working with peace

corps volunteers gave me

important life skills that i would never

ever learn anywhere else and this is

don’t be afraid of anything

please speak up it is okay to make

mistakes

it is okay to have your opinion and it

is okay

for multitasking we were doing tons of

things

but most important what i’m grateful to

my peace corps volunteer

he once called me in and shows me

something really big

he says what is this do you know i said

no says this is pc

i’m like okay what is pc he says this is

personal computer

okay what the hell is this he says well

this is something that will make the

life

of the people easier in the future and

this huge thing

is switched on by one button okay you

need to remember i did not understand

anything but i kept in my mind okay

there is a button that switches this

thing

on and in just a couple of months after

that the whole

jumery was shocked by the information

that there is an opening in another u.s

based organization

a salary of 170 dollars in 1995

most of you are not even born that time

so you need to realize it’s a huge

amount of money

and i’m there i already count myself but

i still was negative i scolded to my

parents i said well

i know i will not pass so i’m going

there the interview is there

and all of a sudden they ask me do you

know what pc

is can you imagine my happiness at that

moment

i think i was shining all over yay i

know what this is

he said okay can you do something i said

i can switch it on

and that was very important so i

switched it on

i typed my name for 20 minutes i think

and then answered other questions and

left home

and all of a sudden i’m receiving a call

that i am the one

hired they called me to the office

you can imagine i did not go there i ran

there i

flew there i’m reaching the office and

the guys are asking me

brianna do you want to know why are you

hired i’m like

it doesn’t matter but yes please tell me

and they tell me

well mainly three reasons okay your

english was good

you were the only one who at least saw

computer in her life

but most important out of so many

participants

you were the only one who nobody called

and asked to hire her

i remember that moment of my life so

vividly because at that moment i

realized

one thing i failed the exam

of life all this time the life was

teaching me that

it is okay if something bad happens

it is okay if something injust happens

it is okay because if i got that job

i would mean miss this one who was much

more paid

i would not work in peace corps and

learn so many skills that helped me even

up to now

and i failed and the lesson learned

you can call it an importance to be

positive

you can call it necessity to be

proactive

i call it a power of a clique

what is the moment you click and stop

and you need to realize this clicking

yourself

the stopping yourself is owned

and controlled only by you

and there are four main things of course

you can google about google about that

and there are tons of research

but the first one is you need to realize

you are being negative

you need to be honest with yourself at

this

very moment secondly please

make the inventory of your thoughts and

of your words

and please keep in mind i’m not telling

you what to think or what to speak

you are all grown up i’m urging you to

make the inventory of the words

and thoughts you are using all the time

these are the ones who control you

and when you make the list then you will

be able to understand

which parts you actually need in your

life

the third one is please please stop

playing the victim role it has never

ever helped anybody to get anywhere

see the moment you play victim you start

pitying yourself

your body is in the standby position

your mind

is not moving you know why because he

doesn’t have to

he knows well i’m pd

myself wow i’m a bad girl they treated

me badly

okay live with that go

only then you can move forward

and the fourth one please take the

responsibility

please feel your part in the whole story

they say reactive people are the ones

who are like actors who play the lines

written for them by another people so

are you the one

playing somebody else’s lines or you are

the one playing your own story which you

have written yourself see the important

point

is we all turn into positive mode

human nature is that you don’t start in

the negativity

all the time we all move the nuance is

how quickly you switch your button

how quickly you pull the gears and how

quickly you push on the brakes

how quickly you click and how long does

it take you to rebuild

yourself is it a day a month

a year a whole lifetime

and we need this clique for us to go

forward

we had a huge a very prejudiced year

2020 filled with tensions

and all the bad stuff possible and we

are having a very uncertain 2021

and i think we as country and nation

also need this clique

to be able to head to the safe future

we also need this clique to be able to

move forward and to rebuild ourselves

and as today is march 8

and due to clara setkin and other

amazing women we have the power

to celebrate this day and we have

official reason to request

presence and attention i would like to

finish up with a story that happened

back in 2000

when i was attending women empowerment

conference

and i think if my husband ever knew how

many women empowerment conferences i

have ever attended

he would never have married me but now

the moment is gone he cannot throw away

15 years of marriage

so he stuck with me but the thing is

when i was attending one of the

conferences you need to keep in mind 300

people

all talking about women empowerment that

a woman should work

that a woman should be in the leadership

position she should make the decisions

and blah blah blah blah

and all of a sudden one woman stands up

irish woman

and tells literally the following

who said a woman should walk maybe a

woman doesn’t want to walk

maybe she wants to sit at home and take

care of her children

or lay on the beach with ridiculously

expensive

cocktail please stop it a woman should

do whatever she wants

to do the end and with this

in mind my dears i want to really wish

you

may you always have the heart and may

you always have the brains

to do whatever you want to do and this

whatever you want to do will make you

truly and unconditionally

happy thank you