Black Tax in the 21st Century

[Music]

have you ever met a highly opinionated

person

and by this person i’m talking about

that one uncle

that usually comes in drunk or the other

uncle that

um thinks he’s lived through seven to

eight generations

let me see if i can bring it home for

you have you

ever been summoned into a family meeting

so mostly family meetings range from

a cousin who got pregnant to the

favorite niece who is getting married

either one of them most of the times you

find that the family members the uncles

or the aunts

do come to a consensus so you find that

it’s very unfortunate for the cousin

why because the ants that know it all

will come and throw stones and we will

also find that for the favorite niece

we have uncles that are determined to

the young man

that is coming so they’ll all want to

discuss the wedding

they’ll all want to talk about how much

we should tell him to pay they all have

experience

all in all so at the end of the day

these people

do come up with a solution whether

it’s sending the pregnant cousin to

the baby daddy or it’s coming up with an

amount of money

for the favorite niece but today i want

us to talk about the elephant in the

room that is never discussed

in these family meetings especially by

that one uncle

children are not a retirement plan

let’s talk about black tax so i know

this phenomenon for some of us who are

privileged might not know it

but for some of us most of us actually

are going through it

so a definition for you black tax is the

money that is expected

from us by our families it is embedded

it is expected with no excuses

so now in my peer group today

you’ll find that a lot of young people

today

are pushing at entry-level positions

they are very innovative at startups

they are brilliant entrepreneurs they

are changing the narrative in these huge

corporations

and also they are actually earning

slightly above the minimum wage

so they’re making good money and by good

money let’s say for argument’s sake

between four five and maybe some way

twelve thousand quacha

but but their money

is not their money so the black child

between the ages of 18 and 40

have inherited this black tax we’ve

inherited

burdens so our parents

uncompromising out of love spend

thousands of thousands of questions on

us

from birth to the time that we get our

independence

but the million dollar question i don’t

know if it’s the million question

question now is

are we then supposed to pay it all back

i don’t know if joey mentioned that i

was a financial advisor so

maybe just maybe i might be speaking

from an expert point of view

so today i want us to for you to think

about this and by the time i’m done

speaking

i want you to choose which side of the

coin you fall back on

so there’s this phenomenon nowadays

called financial planning

and worth creation and financial freedom

that no one wants to discuss in these

family meetings

before i go any further how many of us

in here

were raised by an aunt

a sister or even parent

well i’ll try to think that every one of

us didn’t raise ourselves yeah

so every one of us were raised by

someone but let me ask you this question

how many of us feel obliged or obligated

to send the money every single month

because they’ll think

you’re ungrateful

don’t raise your hand you might be

sitting next to the person that raised

you

i don’t want you caught into a family

meeting

the one thing that i want us to do is

take this

with a pinch of salt i’m not saying

let’s abuse

black tax i’ll give you an example of

someone that i read up

someone called boy to melo so boy to

melo is based in ese

he’s a branch manager a bank branch

manager and he had these sentiments to

say

he said black tax is not as bad as you

are trying to determine

we are africans we’re raised by

communities

and also let us not westernize our

cultures

let us not embrace things that are

coming from abroad

and try to introduce it in our cultures

we are africans

yes but then he goes on to say

because africans don’t have generational

wealth

that means i am to take care of everyone

else

so that caught my attention he said

generation world i’m glad he admitted it

i’m glad that he said that

but he didn’t leave out reality so what

is this

generational wealth let’s talk about

this today

and of course i am talking to

parents i’m talking to future mothers

and future fathers or current

parents children are not your retirement

plan

you are not having five kids to multiply

their income by

five only for you to know how much

you’re going to be earning in your

retirement

so the one thing that i need us to

understand is

black tax is black tax let’s not get rid

of it

but i want you to understand that i do

not want your child

graduating thinking that when my dad or

my mother calls

hell will rain down if i answer that i

do not have fans so there’s this

phenomenon like i mentioned

that is called generational wealth

so there are always two sides to this

coin

like i mentioned let’s not abuse black

tax but let’s change the narrative

you wouldn’t die let’s keep it of course

we can’t even change it overnight

but the good part is most of us in here

are between the ages of 18 and 14.

that means you and i it starts here

or maybe it ends here whichever way

we’re only changing the narrative

let’s leave it as black tax but let our

children

give back from a point of love and not

obligation

the reason why i say this is right now

you currently have an

income you don’t know that 20 years post

you will not be as strong you will not

be as young so what

are you doing about it i’m saying some

of us are comfortable

i’m saying some of us are actually happy

giving back

and i’ll make reference to this the

bible

says uh a wise man

leaves wealth for his children’s

children

being a christian nation let’s abide by

that

also the same bible tells us to honor

our

parents so the beauty about this is

it is balanced but what i need you to

understand

is let us raise our children

not for them to pay us back how about we

start passing on wealth

and not burdens how about we become

the generation that starts that

particular innovation

so let old traditions marry with 21st

century traditions

we’re not changing anything let’s say

let’s honor our parents

but parents do not come at us

saying because i birthed you mwanango

pay me back you ungrateful child

those those those are the sentiments we

get

and honestly speaking we cannot speak

back

why because we are africans we respect

our parents and i speak from a point of

respect

another thing also we don’t like to talk

about

the things that goes through the minds

of

men so immediately two young people get

married

guess what whatever my daughter used to

send me is supposed to double

why because we have another

another child on the other side which is

the husband

but when are you going to think about

that man first providing for his nuclear

family before he can look at you

have you ever thought about it have you

ever thought about how this man

has to tour the ground how he can’t even

share these sentiments with you

why because you expect him to sell his

house sell his car

because he drives a car saying and this

is the narrative now

you’re going to pass on the burden to

the wife and say because

of the woman that he married he doesn’t

send us much money

but the one thing that you felt to do as

an individual was passed on generational

world

guess what you are passing on burdens so

you expect this young

person this young man to provide for you

whilst still providing for his family

black

tax also when you have five children

you expect the first born to take care

of the siblings

inherited black tux another person who’s

been raised by their aunt

feels in the back of their mind because

my aunt

raised me i should take care of

my cousin her child subconscious

it’s gratitude but let’s be honest you

just don’t want to be called into a

family meeting

so let’s talk about these things the way

we are vocal and opinionated in our

family meetings

let’s change the narrative about black

tax let’s talk about it in a different

way

what is generational wealth

what is financial freedom let’s borrow

some of these thoughts that go through

our

our friends like the lebanese

and the indians so you’ll find that for

the indian or the lebanese family

the grandfather had a hardware store the

son

had a restaurant and

his son is going to own a clothing store

that is generational wealth so on top of

that they’re not

sitting waiting saying because my

grandfather had a hardware store

they pass on the knowledge of

generational wealth why

because you are going to have a family

of your own and you cannot depend on

what your grandfather did

so how about we pass on such cultures in

the same family meetings

how about we stop stunning that young

lady that got pregnant

yes we do make mistakes yes it

gives us joy when our favorite niece is

getting married and that is the only

reason we come together

but let us change the narrative let us

call family meetings and tell them

saying

please do not call our daughter when an

uncle has swallowed a shovel in the

village

you cannot save a 2 000 quarter without

receiving an emergency

i’m not saying let’s not give we’ve been

raised by the community

we are part of a community we are

africans we thrive

because of the community but i want us

to graduate

to go into this world thinking

saying you know what my mother is

michael i

love my father to death lord knows this

but you need to understand that i have

obligations

i have things that run through my head

there are certain days when

things heaven is not so close

but maybe just maybe in as much as he

loves me he might not understand

it’s coming from a point of love so let

us change the narrative

like i said take this with a pinch of

salt you might take it you might not

it might affect you it might not but one

way

or another 20 years post which parent

are you going to be

are you going to be the one that

terrorizes your children

because they did not send back or are

you the one that bugs them from a point

of love and say honey

it is my birthday i need some flowers

or even on days when there’s an

emergency you sit down your child and

say

manango at a certain point

i need this but because we’re africans

parents don’t have that approach it’s

either you do

or you don’t and if you don’t i’m sorry

so let’s change the narrative we are

young

we are working we are still very young

and because we live

in this integrated world

that is moving at a very fast pace means

in this room i can guarantee you most of

us are successes

just by the bare fact that you came to a

ted talk

so that in its own attributes the fact

that you

are bound to make a significant amount

of money

by the time you get to retirement start

planning

for your retirement because children are

not a retirement plan

have children out of love and not for

income purposes

i might say too much but let he

who has an ear here thank you