Embracing Empathy Is Key for Building Resilience in the Work We Do

hello everyone

my name is anna givanovic i’m an alumna

from

uc merced’s class of 2015

and i’m very excited to be part of tedx

uc merced’s conference this year

my talk is about empathy in the

workplace

i hope you find

this helpful while also

some solace from a story you can relate

to

being an empath means that sometimes

you’ll cry at work

this talk is about making it your

superpower

before i begin i want to

put out a disclaimer i’m an analyst in

i.t

what do i know about empathy turns out

that

being an analyst in i.t means having

tough conversations

sometimes introspective ones with

yourself

i started out as an intern

in i.t with no direct experience

transferable skills if you will

that meant my assignments were fast

paced

required quick turnaround times

and being in rooms with extremely

experienced people

i felt overwhelmed and it still happened

sometimes

there was one time

when i was struggling

and

i was coming out of a meeting that

resulted in conflicting assignments

a mentor stayed behind with me

i remember breaking down

balling there’s too many cooks in the

kitchen

followed by i’m not cut out for this

they paused and said

we’re humans not robots

they consoled me in a way i never

thought of before

and that’s the story i want to share

with you

my journey in embracing empathy

what was i actually experiencing

empaths can be sponges when it comes to

people’s stories

and experiences that meeting happened to

be

very tough one

i don’t actually remember what happened

but what i do

know is that you might think

empaths and this emotion is from

is just in stories like books and movies

but it was happening to me in real life

and it happens at work it’s no surprise

it’s mainly because the average person

spends a third of their lives

working or in some sort of work

environment

we can’t hit the pause button on our

emotions

doing what you love loving what you do

what you do it’s rewarding but it can

also be draining

i thought of this as a weakness for

quite a while

until i started looking for some

positives and how to make it better

i leaned into it and that’s what i

really recommend to you or want

for you to share to share with you is

ask yourself what could i do with all

these feelings

what i really wanted to do and what some

of you might be experiencing or

experienced in the past

is connecting

wanting to connect with someone and

staying connected

there the reason for my feelings was

really

a disconnect

that i needed to get an assignment done

and what i started to do

was bring in my favorite snack or bake

something to share with everyone

i even connected with someone over toast

now i know there are limitations

working from home but think about the

ways that

you can connect with others or stay

connected

i don’t have a solid answer what i

do recommend are virtual coffees

or just taking the time to reach out

what my mentor was saying is

empathy sets us apart as humans

at a time when we’re constantly

automating our day-to-day lives

day-to-day tasks empathy is at the heart

of those innovations

think about your favorite apps or

services

it inspires our problem solving when we

put people

first whether it’s end users or people

part of that build process

in a way it enforces a shared purpose

it’s especially important now through

the uncertainty of the pandemic

it’s important to talk about empathy

because

it helps promote work that is meaningful

with long-term benefits rather than

short-term

burnout you might

be feeling it now studying working from

home

so what can you do about it

find ways to connect the things you’re

studying and doing

with your own pain points

you can start now or any time really

empathy is all around us

it’s present

it’s in our past it’s in our future

what i mean by that is empathy is part

of being

present being in the moment experience

experiencing something with someone or

something embracing

empathy towards yourself and others is

part of overcoming your past

whether individual or shared experiences

and

finally having empathy empathy towards

the future

is part of embracing possibilities and

continuous improvement

problem solving with an opportunistic

mindset

are there any drawbacks of empathy yes

yes it’s a fairly new concept

to apply in the work context

our society tends to incentivize the

outgoing

and outspoken it takes a lot of practice

and grit

to figure out how to leverage empathy

effectively but it’s a skill

worth developing

you’ll feel like an imposter

you’ll feel like a has been

now those are

one and the same and i’ll tell you how

you’re comparing yourself to others

including your past self

and it’s not your fault we’re programmed

to do this

we are taught through school

through life to train our minds in a way

that we build

our toolkit by comparing things

we think are similar but we are not

similar

we’re not similar to our past selves

because

experience makes us who we are today

we are also not the people we compare

ourselves to

because again we do not experience

the same things or experience

one event same way through the same lens

improving the way we talk about

ourselves is a step in the right

direction

again we are not robots

our unique experiences and

characteristics

are what make us human

so how do you make it your superpower

make room for yourself own your space

the journey to embracing empathy is long

in the

road less traveled especially in school

in the workplace it requires you to grow

and find yourself

but i’ll tell you now it’s worth it and

sometimes it takes a step

back from what you’re doing a pause

in order to understand and communicate

your needs

finding your strengths your weaknesses

and your toolkit

it’s invaluable

sometimes it’s in the people you meet

the projects you work on

or sometimes even toast