Embracing Empathy Is Key for Building Resilience in the Work We Do
hello everyone
my name is anna givanovic i’m an alumna
from
uc merced’s class of 2015
and i’m very excited to be part of tedx
uc merced’s conference this year
my talk is about empathy in the
workplace
i hope you find
this helpful while also
some solace from a story you can relate
to
being an empath means that sometimes
you’ll cry at work
this talk is about making it your
superpower
before i begin i want to
put out a disclaimer i’m an analyst in
i.t
what do i know about empathy turns out
that
being an analyst in i.t means having
tough conversations
sometimes introspective ones with
yourself
i started out as an intern
in i.t with no direct experience
transferable skills if you will
that meant my assignments were fast
paced
required quick turnaround times
and being in rooms with extremely
experienced people
i felt overwhelmed and it still happened
sometimes
there was one time
when i was struggling
and
i was coming out of a meeting that
resulted in conflicting assignments
a mentor stayed behind with me
i remember breaking down
balling there’s too many cooks in the
kitchen
followed by i’m not cut out for this
they paused and said
we’re humans not robots
they consoled me in a way i never
thought of before
and that’s the story i want to share
with you
my journey in embracing empathy
what was i actually experiencing
empaths can be sponges when it comes to
people’s stories
and experiences that meeting happened to
be
very tough one
i don’t actually remember what happened
but what i do
know is that you might think
empaths and this emotion is from
is just in stories like books and movies
but it was happening to me in real life
and it happens at work it’s no surprise
it’s mainly because the average person
spends a third of their lives
working or in some sort of work
environment
we can’t hit the pause button on our
emotions
doing what you love loving what you do
what you do it’s rewarding but it can
also be draining
i thought of this as a weakness for
quite a while
until i started looking for some
positives and how to make it better
i leaned into it and that’s what i
really recommend to you or want
for you to share to share with you is
ask yourself what could i do with all
these feelings
what i really wanted to do and what some
of you might be experiencing or
experienced in the past
is connecting
wanting to connect with someone and
staying connected
there the reason for my feelings was
really
a disconnect
that i needed to get an assignment done
and what i started to do
was bring in my favorite snack or bake
something to share with everyone
i even connected with someone over toast
now i know there are limitations
working from home but think about the
ways that
you can connect with others or stay
connected
i don’t have a solid answer what i
do recommend are virtual coffees
or just taking the time to reach out
what my mentor was saying is
empathy sets us apart as humans
at a time when we’re constantly
automating our day-to-day lives
day-to-day tasks empathy is at the heart
of those innovations
think about your favorite apps or
services
it inspires our problem solving when we
put people
first whether it’s end users or people
part of that build process
in a way it enforces a shared purpose
it’s especially important now through
the uncertainty of the pandemic
it’s important to talk about empathy
because
it helps promote work that is meaningful
with long-term benefits rather than
short-term
burnout you might
be feeling it now studying working from
home
so what can you do about it
find ways to connect the things you’re
studying and doing
with your own pain points
you can start now or any time really
empathy is all around us
it’s present
it’s in our past it’s in our future
what i mean by that is empathy is part
of being
present being in the moment experience
experiencing something with someone or
something embracing
empathy towards yourself and others is
part of overcoming your past
whether individual or shared experiences
and
finally having empathy empathy towards
the future
is part of embracing possibilities and
continuous improvement
problem solving with an opportunistic
mindset
are there any drawbacks of empathy yes
yes it’s a fairly new concept
to apply in the work context
our society tends to incentivize the
outgoing
and outspoken it takes a lot of practice
and grit
to figure out how to leverage empathy
effectively but it’s a skill
worth developing
you’ll feel like an imposter
you’ll feel like a has been
now those are
one and the same and i’ll tell you how
you’re comparing yourself to others
including your past self
and it’s not your fault we’re programmed
to do this
we are taught through school
through life to train our minds in a way
that we build
our toolkit by comparing things
we think are similar but we are not
similar
we’re not similar to our past selves
because
experience makes us who we are today
we are also not the people we compare
ourselves to
because again we do not experience
the same things or experience
one event same way through the same lens
improving the way we talk about
ourselves is a step in the right
direction
again we are not robots
our unique experiences and
characteristics
are what make us human
so how do you make it your superpower
make room for yourself own your space
the journey to embracing empathy is long
in the
road less traveled especially in school
in the workplace it requires you to grow
and find yourself
but i’ll tell you now it’s worth it and
sometimes it takes a step
back from what you’re doing a pause
in order to understand and communicate
your needs
finding your strengths your weaknesses
and your toolkit
it’s invaluable
sometimes it’s in the people you meet
the projects you work on
or sometimes even toast