How to build resilience as your superpower

[Music]

[Applause]

imagine

a nine-year-old little girl left home

all alone

no cable no cell phone

scared to death every time there’s a

noise outside

she’s wondering if a stranger is looking

to break into her home

with every walk past the window her

heart

would stop and she would be scared

to go to sleep because she didn’t know

when her parents

would return home

well this little girl was me

this was how i started building my

resilience

i built it by facing my fears

even though i was in a dark scared place

as a child

i built my confidence by not letting my

circumstances

keep me there this became

my superpower today i want to share with

you

my story so i can help you discover

how you can build resilience into your

life

building confidence and beliefs in you

in order to build this superpower within

you

but what does it mean to be truly

resilient

i believe that resilience is the

capacity

to recover from adversity to bounce back

from challenging life situations or when

things

don’t go as planned when things are

stressful

and challenging and overwhelming it

means being calm

clear and stable the question is

how do you choose to face these

challenges

let me tell you about how i started my

journey

on building my resilience

my mom is resilient she was a refugee

from vietnam

she risked her life with her younger

sister to escape

her country on a boat they were stranded

for four days

they were raided by pirates not once

but twice sadly her sister died on the

boat

but my mom she survived after 15

treacherous days she arrived at an

indonesian refugee camp

she was one of the lucky ones sent to

canada

my mom had me at the age of 40. she was

a single mom

on welfare i grew up in chinatown

and as a child i remember lining up at

the food bank

and having christmas dinner at the union

gospel mission

and getting clothes and toys donated

from the salvation army

looking back i don’t regret growing up

the way i did

it taught me many valuable lessons in my

life

like being grateful every single day

for everything that i have when you come

from rock bottom

you truly appreciate everything life has

to offer

you never ever take anything for granted

because you know the value of the

simplest things in life

i’ve never met my biological father

my stepdad my real dad came into my life

when i was eight

what i remember most was that he worked

six days a week

12 hours a day to provide a better life

for me and my mom

with his minimum wage job he made sure

there was food on the table

a roof over our heads and provided the

basics

of life for us his

resilience created a deep-rooted

resilience

inside me thank you dad

for instilling a hard work ethic in me

and for showing me unconditional love

i started working in grade four at the

tender age of ten

every saturday i would wake up at five

a.m

when it was pitch dark outside with my

mom

and we would take transit for two hours

to make sandwiches

on a conveyor belt

the first day i got paid my boss handed

me

50 it wasn’t much money

but to me as a 10 year old little girl

it was the most money i’ve ever seen my

entire life

that day something shifted for me

seeing those dollar bills in the palms

of my hand

created a desire in me and i made a

promise to myself

and i vowed from that day forward

i was going to step into my independence

some may say why would my mom let me

work at such a young age

to them i say thank you mom

thank you for teaching me independence

the value of money and responsibility

i put myself through university working

minimum wage jobs

i was an average student but despite

that

i worked for two fortune 500 companies

one day i had lunch with the ceo and i

shared with him

that i didn’t think the corporate world

was for me

i knew i was an entrepreneur at heart

he suggested i get into real estate my

first thought that came into my head was

who’s going to trust this 24 year old

with their property

i didn’t have the confidence in me just

yet

my confidence grew when i entered a

contest

selling ad space to a newsletter the

winning team would win a trip anywhere

around the world my friend and i entered

and we set up appointments to pitch to

realtors

but the night before we began my friend

bailed on me my heart

dropped and all these doubts and

insecurities came rushing through my

head

long story short i ended up winning the

contest on my own

this gave me the confidence to know that

i could sell

after proving to myself that i could do

it i

am enough shortly after i got my real

estate license in 2010.

by 2015 i’m proud to say

i became a top 1 realtor

i placed 32nd out of 14 000 agents

my friend who bailed on me provided me

with a great learning opportunity

to face my fears and conquer my doubts

and insecurities

i am thankful for her because of her i

created a strong and unbreakable

belief within myself to know that

anything

and everything is possible

resilience what an amazing superpower

it can be taught and is a skill that can

be learned

and cultivated over time it’s like a

muscle

that can be strengthened through

exercise

resilience is a habit-forming skill

the more goals you accomplish the more

resilient you become

resilience is also much more than a

skill

it’s an adaptation a journey

that begins early on in childhood and

continues the rest of your life

so how do you build this magic

superpower

let me share with you three ways

first change your perspective

are you a victim of your circumstance

or do you use your circumstance to fuel

your motivation

for success when you adjust your

perspective

you can see things from another angle

you can see

opportunities when there were obstacles

this is a way to reframe the picture

ask yourself when faced with these

issues

what are your options what

can you learn from this and what may be

your opportunities

these questions turn you away from the

blame game and allow

you to focus on the positive

the second way to build resilience is

choose

your response in times of difficulties

we can panic and react negatively

or we can remain calm logical to find a

solution

how we react can change our outcome

when i was faced with a decision to move

forward with those meetings

or give up on the contests this led me

to a path of opportunity that i embraced

and becoming the realtor i am today

your reaction and action is always

up to you the third way

to building resilience is finding a

sense of purpose

growing up poor and seeing my parents go

through hardship

gave me the strength of purpose to

achieve

success it allowed me to give back to my

parents

to whom i’m grateful for for bringing me

up in this world

we cannot protect ourselves from all the

hardships of life

what we can do is protect our own

self-protection

the capacity to endure hardships

and bounce back more quickly and most

importantly to know and to have

confidence and belief

that it is always possible to overcome

adversity no matter where you stand as a

society

adversity will come i learned to be

resilient

by looking at how my parents fought

through their challenges

and came out stronger i grew up not

having the things i wanted

that motivated me to pursue my dreams

if you are resilient and you be sure

you’re going to arrive at your

destination don’t

give up now one moment

one decision one choice

can change your life forever

it can bring you closer to your goals

and your dreams

the distance where you are right now and

where you want to be

is action before taking action

you have to make a choice so stop

procrastinating on that dream

just make the right decision today

this little girl from chinatown built on

herself

the superpower of resilience i challenge

you

to build this within yourself don’t

waste another second

cause you can have everything that

you’ve ever dreamed of

now thank you