Fck being humble

[Music]

for years we’ve been taught that being

humble

is the key to individual success but

what if we lived in a world where we

were unapologetically proud of our

achievements

what if we didn’t shy away from

celebrating our wins or putting

ourselves forward for

opportunities instead of waiting for

them to come to us

what if we champion ourselves became

socially acceptable instead of looked

down upon

for being arrogant two years ago i set

out on a mission

to change the way the world views

self-promotion

because i believe that self-advocacy can

have the power to change your life but

only if you show people what you’re

capable of doing

instead of just telling them i’ll give

you an example

we all know the saying if you work hard

you will go far

this is the narrative we’re taught as

children through school

university and the workplace but

have you ever questioned why some people

work hard

and they don’t go far when i think about

this

and i’ve explored this topic for a long

time now

i think that there is actually a flaw in

that statement

i think that society has set us up to

fail

by only telling us one side of that

story

it has made us believe that when we

don’t do well when you don’t see the

results that we want to see

it’s down to us and it’s our fault

the side effects of this can be a

crippling sense of inadequacy

a lifetime of self-doubt and in some

cases it can limit our ambitions in life

for so long we have been taught that

being a modest

will take as far in life but i’m not

sure that is the full story

when we look at some of the most

inspirational and successful people

in the world was it their

self-deprecating attitude that

accelerated their career

or was it their promotional team working

in the background

making everything happen for them would

their inventions have been picked up

in stores or would their songs have been

played on mainstream media

without the marketing support of others

no

everything in life is marketed now i’m

not suggesting you create your own

publicity team

but what i am highlighting to you is

that people are rarely plucked out of

crowds for being

an unstoppable force they invest in

self-promotion

in order to stand out so whether you

outsource it or you make it your

responsibility

embracing self-promotion is not optional

it’s essential

now before you tense up and insist that

you don’t do self-promotion and it’s

just not for you

i want to give you the actual definition

of the word

because i think somewhere along the

lines the meaning has got lost

so when you take the word self-promotion

self means

i and promotion is just an activity that

supports

an aim or a goal so why are we so scared

to embrace it

sure you might feel that it’s a lack of

experience or confidence

but something that i’ve observed that i

think is the problem that stops us from

pursuing it

is that we’re held back by foss the fear

of sounding stupid

this is a phrase i’ve coined to

summarize the paralysis that we face

when it comes to promoting ourselves we

are so

concerned about how others will perceive

us that it stops

us from sharing our full selves and our

successes

many people worry about being classed as

a fraud

and others just don’t believe in

themselves enough to convince themselves

to everyone around them

but what happens as a result is that we

fall into

camp generic a space where we and others

around

us can’t identify our distinctive and

unique qualities

the irony of it all is that we’re all so

busy caring about ourselves

we’re not actually caring about the

people around us

so rather than wasting your time

questioning what

a linkedin connection you’ve never

actually met might

think of you for sharing a work with why

not instead

focus on all the amazing things that

could happen as a result of opening up

the reason i speak so highly about

self-promotion

is that i have witnessed first-hand the

positive impact it can have on both

myself and the community that i support

it hasn’t been an easy ride and it has

taken a lot of me

helping people convince themselves to

believe in themselves and what they are

capable of

but i think the two components that have

really helped to make this work

is first of all accepting that you are

good at what you do

this might mean actually accepting the

praise that you get from other people

or just identifying yourself when you

feel you’ve done a good job

and secondly taking pride in what you do

rather than leaving work at the office

you give yourself the time

and space to revel in your achievements

neither of these have to be done

publicly

but they should be done personally and

consistently

because the more you do it the less

intimidating

it will feel without this reflection we

freeze in moments where we should speak

up whether it’s inputting your opinion

in a meeting

or small talk at a networking event or

even putting forward your case for a

promotion or a pay rise

we miss out on opportunities because we

haven’t given ourselves the credit

of everything we’ve achieved we have to

stop

waiting and looking for others to

validate us

and start by validating ourselves by

owning our achievements

throughout my career i have felt

overlooked and undervalued

i have felt like a cog in the machine

championing other people’s values and

goals and missions

it was only until i took a leap of faith

in myself

and started this movement did i actually

start to be seen for

all the amazing things that i could do

and that was capable of

i’ve unlocked doors that i’ve never

thought i would

from writing a book to giving this talk

i am proof that when you invest in

yourself

you can change your future i want to

make it clear that i truly do believe

in humility and i think there will

always be a space for it in your career

but it should never get in the way of

moments when you have the ability to

shape your future

the thing i think many of us forget is

in order for us to be humble or

modest we must first be celebrated

and we’re unlikely to be celebrated if

we’re not being seen

so you can work really hard day in and

day out

but if you are not showing people what

you can do then you might wait a long

time

to actually be admired in your industry

for everything that you are achieving

and doing

this is not about being arrogant it’s

about

claiming your worth and never letting

your mind being consumed

by self-doubt and reminding yourself

that you

are worthy and you deserve to be proud

self-promotion isn’t a dirty word so

don’t let people make you feel

guilty for celebrating your success

care less share more thank you

you