Not Your Average Teenager

[Music]

[Applause]

hi guys

not your average teenager so i have to

ask a question

what were you like at 15 when i ask most

people this

question they reminisce on maybe their

first

maybe second year of high school they

tell me about how they had to plan their

sweet 16th birthday party

and then they’ll just tell me something

nostalgic when i was 15

i remember being so insecure

not about a boy that i liked like most

girls my age

but because i had just been asked to

squat and cough

naked in front of a female officer

she ordered me to take off my clothes

and squat

in front of her fifteen-year-old me was

in jail

i was an intake being charged with

attempted

murder in the years leading up to me

turning 15

i had always been determined that i

would be a ballerina

i love attention and i love to dance so

i

always knew that that sort of stage was

for me however

i grew up in northeast d.c in a

neighborhood that was plagued with

violence

raised by a single mother who had to

work two jobs to support me

and my older sister my older sister

tried to help raise me

but she was just a kid herself so she

was in way

over her head she didn’t know how to

change a diaper

she wasn’t prepared to teach me how to

talk

how to read and write how to tie my

shoes

to take me to school to feed me but

she tried one thing i greatly remember

my mother telling me

was that if i ever got into a fight and

i was the one that got beat up

that she would beat my butt

those words stuck with me for the rest

of my life

so one day when i was in high school and

a classmate and i got into an argument

i went home and i told my mom that girl

was

much bigger than me mom reminded me

again

that if i were the one to get beat up

that she would beat

my butt and she walked over to the

kitchen drawer

and she pulled out a parent knife she

handed

me a paring knife with a blade that was

about

this long so the next day when i got to

school

and my classmate approached me i pulled

the knife out of my pocket

and i stabbed her right in the abdomen

i was immediately arrested and locked up

still 15

jail was a totally different world

imagine being a teenager you’re already

prone to rebel

and now there’s someone telling you what

to do

what to eat when to eat how to eat it

when to use the bathroom

how to use the bathroom when to go to

sleep and when you could watch tv

and it always stayed on the same channel

i was

so afraid all i could think about was

trying to go to sleep on that thin

mattress that barely covered that metal

slab that was supposed to be my bed

and again everybody was much bigger

and much taller than me

i was released from incarceration and i

found myself back into the same

neighborhood

with the same friends the same family

and the same

drama luckily a district attorney took a

chance on me

she was starting a program for at-risk

at high-risk girls and she wanted me to

be a part of it

i was honored this program gave me a new

type of self-esteem

somebody believed in me somebody gave me

a chance to show my potential

and it was in that program that she

showed me how to

live in an environment but not be of

that environment she gave me the tools

that i needed for success that would

lead me to greatness one day

tools such as how to dress for an

interview

how to conduct myself in an interview

how to build a resume

anger management how to change the way

you speak according to the setting that

you

are in and it was with those tools that

i was able to graduate high school i was

able to graduate

college and it was at the university of

maryland eastern shore

with a degree in rehabilitation services

where i now have the tools to

effectively rehabilitate those with

mental

and behavioral needs after i graduated

college

i became employed for dc’s national

association

for the advancement of returning

citizens cure the streets program

why i hope to plan community events and

forge peace in the former neighborhoods

that i used to live in

i even became employed at district of

columbia public schools

where i now work at baloo senior high

school as a paraprofessional and

educational aide

what i do is i assist children with

educational and behavioral needs

in smaller classroom settings and i give

them more attention

and more time to comprehend the lessons

that are in front of them

what i’m really able to do is pour

myself into the children that need me

the most

i’m able to show the children that they

can do it because they remind me so much

of myself i worked with one girl

she had actually just turned 15. she was

in charge of taking care of her four

younger brothers

because her mother had abandoned them

she was fighting constantly

her grades were slipping her clothes

weren’t clean and she had just stopped

coming to school altogether

so i took her to lunch one day and i let

her tell me everything that was going on

with her

i just listened every fear every cry

every piece of anger i just let her let

it all

go i took her out more often

on top of letting her vent to me daily i

took her shopping to boost her

confidence in herself

i took her out of her neighborhood out

of her comfort zone

i took her to a musical she never been

before

and i helped her with all of her

homework she did a complete

turnaround and she still calls me

constantly

that is my proudest moment

unfortunately i lost my mother a month

before my 20th birthday

and i always remember feeling so

disappointed that she passed away before

i could show her that

i could change before i could show her

that i was making something of myself

i always think about the kids in dc who

were my age

and the kids now who don’t have that

chance

or don’t know that they can change they

don’t know that there’s more options

out there for them i have looked for

options for them

according to usa today the district of

columbia has the highest rate of

juvenile incarceration in the entire

nation

and a recidivism rate that is hovering

just under 25 percent

that is more than twice that of every

state in our entire

nation and unfortunately these youth in

dc don’t have any programs because we

don’t have enough funding

to keep our programs going

i wonder what all those kids will do now

how will they succeed so

i joined community family life services

speakers bureau and it was there that

they taught me

how to not be ashamed of my story how to

not be scared to tell everybody what i

was going through and what i had gone

through

and now i use my voice for good

i have spoken to the justice impact

institute

on the impact of female incarceration i

have spoken to american university

on the impact of how we need more

nonprofit organizations in d.c

i have been featured on the one and four

podcast where i talked to marcus bullock

the ceo of flick shop

on incarceration and recidivism in dc

and more recently

i have spoken on the budget hearing for

the office of victim services

and justice grants for 2020. i use my

voice for good

these children don’t know that there’s a

second option out there for them

and they don’t know that there’s so much

more to us that people don’t know

we are strong we are resilient

and we are yearning for help at the end

of the day

so i have to ask you again what were you

like at 15

have you checked on any 15 year olds

that you know today

thank you

you