The Alchemy Of Fun Transforming Trauma Into Healing

[Applause]

in this life i choose to vibrate

higher

i’m lifting like a moon in a cold bald

sky watching abandoned thoughts

run through the open mind

not judging the trauma

that occupies

mine

let this sound be my portal

i let it be light i see

bye i let it beware

i am

[Music]

my blessings

see i and i always

knowing i’m one

[Music]

my name is jennifer johns i am a singer

i’m a songwriter i’m a producer i’m a

playwright

and i am the very proud niece of

andre bell the one and only

i know him affectionately as uncle buddy

he was my king of fun my mr miyagi

of freedom he made his transition

to the other side of the veil just last

week

so today this stock is for him

let me tell you a little bit about my

uncle buddy my king of fun

my mr miyagi of freedom he had

the biggest smile in all of the world

seriously

he could fix any problem just with his

face

he had the best freckles and the big gap

to smile

and his laugh just shook any pain

right out of your body i would do

anything

right up into my 30s to go to the

grocery store with uncle buddy he would

go into the spice aisle and grab

something and then into the bread

section and grab

something and then he’d be like baby go

run

and give me like a grapefruit

and a racquet lamb and a shoestring

and you’d be like but somehow

he would figure out how to pull it all

together and make

something magical uncle buddy was magic

he was from the south side of chicago

and if you know anything about chicago

and in particular the south side of

chicago

you know that it is home to beautiful

black people

historically oppressed black people

black people who moved from the south

and the great migration right

these are powerful people who have seen

some things

they were magicians and they taught him

that magic that he would then teach to

he was my mom’s best friend and much

like my mom’s

friends they were the first in their

family

often to get a college education to make

out to make it to the other side of the

tracks so to speak

and they would congregate either at

uncle buddy’s house or my mom’s house

every weekend and they would have these

stories of their experiences being the

first black person

in their position of power so my uncle

buddy was the dean of financial aid at

mills college when i was a kid and he

went on to be

the dean of financial aid at cal

berkeley and then

antioch college and so on and my

mother’s friends were those

people in their family they were the

first the black people

that were often the only person of color

in the room

so friday nights when they got together

it was magic they came together to share

their stories and

i just loved being a fly on the wall

shortly earlier in the day

i had taken the trip with uncle buddy to

go and get all of the supplies and i

knew

it was a magical experience but i didn’t

understand that he was performing an

actual ritual

and it was so deep to me

as an adult to look back in this time at

this ritual he was teaching me

he was teaching me the alchemy of fun

the power of using

this renewable resource of fun

to transmute trauma into

joy my mr miyagi of freedom

at every turn was teaching me the

elements

of how to perform this ritual

so on friday evenings they would get

together and they would share their

stories

and the ritual came with a few

specific elements there was always

libations like a really good bottle of

wine

right and there was always really really

good food because uncle buddy could cook

his tail off

and there was always really good music

but most importantly there was this

deep faith and surrender to me

faith is about knowing something greater

is possible

and then there was music and let me tell

you something they would dance

and they would dance and they would

dance and they would dance

oh god and i can hear their laughter

like i’m six years old i’m laying on the

ground just listening

to these wizards unbeknownst to me

moving this energy into space and they

would talk about their day’s experiences

how

they had encountered someone’s

this

[Music]

foreign

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[Applause]

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to god

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we choose grace

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[Applause]

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simple and again

of happiness

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so as they would dance and they would

engage in this alchemy of fun

and the surrender was like the spoon

that stirred the cauldron and then just

like that

they were free they were neither their

job or their race or their gender they

were just moving

and they were light and they were open

and they would rejoice in their bodies

keep

[Applause]

something about this alchemy the

the process this experience that they

would have every friday night where they

would churn

this love around

it led to a freedom a release

a presence of mind see they

had seen the things they were the first

in their family they had

seen real things

their families were from the south they

told stories of lynchings

and of police violence they knew what it

meant to be

profiled they knew what it meant to be

the only

one that looked like them in the room

and so

when they used this alchemic process

of fun they could hear what was theirs

to do

and so the phone would start ringing and

my mom would be like yo

we gotta make sure that this kid doesn’t

drop out of school

we’ve got to figure out how we’re going

to make sure that this person’s tuition

is paid

they would find ways to create new

programs so that more

students of color could come to these

prestigious universities

around the country

i stand on the shoulders of giants but

so did they

and they taught me everything that they

learned

the alchemy of fun

and i would watch them as they would

apply

the same alchemy

to groups outside of our family

so when making change sometimes we

encounter people who don’t look or feel

like us it was faith

the knowingness that something else is

possible

a surrender to the process and then

libations

food music and each other and

i would see their world change i would

see the bridges that they would build

for the next generation to walk across

and most importantly i would see the

pride and the joy i give

deep gratitude for my uncle buddy

who taught me the alchemy

inside of me to liberate myself

to transmute my own trauma into joy

so uncle buddy this one’s for you

i choose fun now

i’m bold and my dedication to fun for

fun

is the gateway to freedom i unabashedly

pursue my own happiness with passion

and purpose i know that the whole world

is waiting on me to be

fun have fun and share fun and i will

not let us down

i live love and laugh all the time

without ceasing from my fun it’s the

light

it makes the world brighter it is

contagious and inspires us

all gives life to us all

so i search for and through my fun

relentlessly

so that i may better understand myself

and unwrap

my sacred and divine purpose on this

planet

in this time of killjoys and for legends

it is imperative that we

are boundless so i make great

love and inspiring music

incredible i choose to dance till i

break

and laugh till i cry for fun is the

elixir

it is the cure it is the panacea it is

my spiritual practice

i choose yeah

you