Reclaim Your Worth By Sharing Your Voice

[Music]

[Applause]

i once stated a guy

when i didn’t know my worth who said my

face isn’t that pretty

but my credit might work

i once dated this guy

when i didn’t know my worth who told me

to be patient

i was second in line don’t worry

the first one might not work

i even dated this guy when i didn’t know

my worth

he had an additional family secret lies

and dirt

i decided to date this guy

when i didn’t value my own worth

and because of my fear of being alone

i just settled with his cruel words

and convinced myself words

don’t hurt

i once dated this guy

when i didn’t know my worth that when i

said

no regarding my body

he held my hands down and said

shh be quiet

this won’t hurt

once stated a guy when i didn’t know my

worth that i was willing

to compromise my faith value

and good judgment and just pray please

let this relationship work

i once was a girl but now i’m a woman

that still does not know

her worth and the decisions that you see

were a direct result of the thoughts

that i had of me

i was on this tedious long journey

and i didn’t even know that i was lost

and because of it

my self-esteem my self-love

and my confidence paid the cost

i was living in the shadow and i didn’t

even know that there could be light

until one day

one day i found myself

i found myself to be beautiful

i found myself to have joy

i found myself to have a voice i found

myself in the will of god but most

importantly

i found me

and i gained the best gift that one

could have

and celebrate all year long

the gift of self-love

so i speak to the little girl

i speak to the grown woman

that does not know her

worth remember you are fearfully

and wonderfully made you keep saying

that

until your mind believes it you keep

saying that

until your heart receives it and you

keep saying that until your life

reflects it

that was my truth i wrote that poem when

i turned

38 years old never forget that

it’s like my freedom speech right

have you ever lived in shame

struggled with feeling unworthy

seeking validation from others

maybe you just worried about what people

would think of you

you see i can answer yes to every last

one of those questions

maybe you can’t relate to losing your

voice

in the search of some man’s arms

or seeking validation

and to feel your void of loneliness

through others

but i could

but tell me this what happens when they

no longer clap for you

what happens when they no longer feel

the quest that you seek which is just to

be loved

heard seen or appreciated

i’ll tell you if you live for their

applause

you’ll die by their silence i know

because i speak from a place of

experience i lived

my life committed to gaining the

approval of

others even at the thought of losing my

own identity my own

voice it took me 38 38 years to arrive

to my aha moment

that’s why i stand here and speak my

truth that’s why i share my story

because if i can just help one person

one person

break free of the bondage then i have

changed a legacy

theirs and they’re worth it

you’re worth it so if you’re hearing

this message today

and it resonates with you repeat after

me

say i’m worth it worthy is

my name sometimes we have to rely on the

strength of

others as we’re building that muscle on

our own

i’m worth it no matter my past

no matter my imperfections no matter my

mistakes

even if i allowed the past mistreatment

i decided my only option was forward

and please note it wasn’t based on how i

felt

it wasn’t even based on me knowing the

end results

because if i based it on how i felt or

knowing all the answers

i would still be in my abyss of i’m not

good enough

let me tell you what i did i just

embraced

the courage to first decide

i finally got into the space where i was

no longer

a voiceless victim but i

became a victorious advocate advocating

for my right

to simply exist and not based on

anyone’s else approval

but my own reclaiming my worth

by sharing my voice my truth

i started taking responsibility to

change the narrative of my own story

you know what releasing the past because

i couldn’t control it

but directing that which i could and by

doing that

i put myself in a space to embrace the

love that was waiting for me

and the help that was waiting to guide

me to my best

yes the best version of my yes yes

that happened to me however i’m still

thriving

yes i’ve been misunderstood

however i’m still whole

yes i did say that however

now my language matches my words

i am loving the woman i am as i’m

working on a woman i’m yet to become

i’m loving the woman i am as i’m working

on the woman i’m yet to become

no longer looking for the light at the

end of the tunnel realizing that the

light is within me

that sounds great right so what i want

to do now

is share with you three steps that i

took that i know that you can take two

to get to this space

called worthy the first step

is i decided and i decided to act

an act is an acronym that stands for

action changes things as you

act so shall you be

don’t allow your fear to direct your

decisions

but allow your action to diminish your

fears

right we no longer can do the things of

the past

when we are moving forward action

changes

things every day we are going to act

and what are we going to do we are going

to say

i’m worthy worthy is my name

and as you’re saying that i need you to

visualize it

what does worthy look like for me how do

i

show up as worthy what does it feel like

i need you to

become the embodiment of worthy you

directed you created it’s your

destination

i am worthy every single

day you say it you

believe it you become it

that’s step one step two we’re going to

change

our narrative what we think and what we

write

why because it needs to serve our place

called worthy we have to actually write

it down

it’s so important that we track what we

say why because if we don’t track it

we can’t address it and we have to

address it

because you’re necessary right

right we cannot change what we have

learned to tolerate

and you are necessary

and so when we track it what can we do

then we can look at it

and we can address it is it true

is it kind and is it necessary and if

not

guess what we must acquit we have to

dismiss it

right and if you find out you know what

this

is true then you need to say it in a way

that honors your place

called worthy and how do you do that you

rewrite it

rewrite it in a way that serves you

that honors you and then we’re going to

take this action

one step forward we’re going to record

it as well

why i had to do this because i spent

20 plus years hearing my voice

dishonor my very existence i was used to

hearing myself say

you’re nothing you can’t do this you’re

not worthy

i had to get used to myself in this

place called worthy

and my new voice is loving kind

and considerate so we have to record

our rewrites okay so that when

things come to us we can quickly play

that

and aggressively address those things

that no longer serve us

so step one act step two

we’re gonna write now we are at step

three we’re gonna take the pledge

however before we go into the pledge

i want to share with you

that there will come a time

you’ll have moments when negative talk

will come to you

but i want to tell you to move forward

anyway i want to remind you to remember

step one decide to move

right decide to act

and be mindful negative talk does not

discriminate

it doesn’t care who you are it doesn’t

care about your background it doesn’t

care that you’re taking these

three steps negative talk will come for

you

right and when negative talk comes for

you

i need you to ask it one question

ask it who sent you no really ask it who

sent you

did my childhood trauma send you did

what my mama say to me send you

did what my boss say to me send you did

my abusive

partner send you who sent

you i need to know who sent you so that

i can deal

with it i have invested too much time

emotionally

spiritually into this thought into this

action

and in order for me to change and deal

with it i need to know who sent you

ask it who sent you we’re not gonna fake

it till we make it

we’re gonna address it so we no longer

regress in it by asking

who sent you okay

now we understand that we understand

that we can have a moment

but the difference is we will no longer

cultivate that moment as our reality

so now we’re ready to take our pledge

and what is a pledge it’s a promise a

commitment

a vow an oath we’re all familiar with

pledges

man we’ve been taking pledges since

since we were little if you’ve ever been

in a boy scouts

girl scouts we take a pledge if you’ve

been in the military we take an oath to

serve our country

if you get married we take a pledge for

richer for poorer for better or worse

now i’m asking you to take a pledge with

the person that you will be with

until death literally do you part

you’re never going to leave you so you

might as well

learn to like love and appreciate this

person

so the pledge is simple the pledge is

i’m worthy worthy is my name not because

of

not in spite of i’m worthy

and i pledge to treat myself as such

that’s it today is your day and remember

the three steps make a decision today to

act

action changes things two

change the narrative of our thoughts and

our words

three take the pledge i’m worthy

and i pledge to treat myself as such

and in closing i want you to grab a

mirror

and as you’re taking the pledge i want

you to look at yourself

and as you’re making the promise and as

you’re saying i’m worthy

and as you’re saying i have decided to

act

action changes things action

changes things action

changes things

what you will really realize is that

action

changes me and as i stated at the

beginning

of the talk in my poem you keep saying

that

until your mind believes it you

keep saying that until your heart

receives it and you

keep saying that until your life

reflects it because worthy

is your name