Small Talk in English what is polite and what is rude
hi i’m vanessa from speak english with
vanessa calm and today again i have my
husband dan hey and we’re going to be
continuing our conversations about
greeting people and today we’re going to
talk about small talk are you ready
ready let’s go alright Dan so when you
first meet someone what are some things
that are okay to talk about for small
talk what would you recommend that
English learners use when they first
meet people
sure well this is probably common in
lots of cultures but one of the first
and easiest things you can talk about is
the weather very easy yes right so you
may just say something like warm day
today right or looks like rain you know
just some kind of simple notification
about the weather or how you feel about
it you know so then the other person can
respond with like yeah it’s been hot all
week you know just like this little
back-and-forth
not very much substance just you know
it’s smog right exactly and I think
something else that you can use for
small talk is talk about your
environment so if you see a friend in
the grocery store you’re in the grocery
store there’s plenty of things to talk
about for small talk you could say oh
wow did you see those tomatoes on sale
I’m so excited or oh wow you have a lot
of ice cream are you going to have a
party or you could even just say what
are you shopping for yeah what are you
shopping for what are you going to buy
or if you’re in a coffee shop Oh what
kind of drink did you get this is a
latte it’s really good I recommend it
talk about your environment I think
that’s really common but what about
things that you shouldn’t talk about
what kind of things do you recommend
that our English learners not say
off-limits stuff yes what’s off-limits
yeah probably just people’s appearance
now this can be good or bad I’d say like
if somebody gets a haircut then it’s
very it’s okay to say something like wow
I really like your haircut you know you
can’t say wow I really hate your hair
of course but you could say you like
your haircut or the clothes but you
wouldn’t want to mention somebody’s like
facial appearance their body
yeah or their body like oh you’re
looking really chipper today
right even that might be not a very good
thing to say or did you lose weight I
had to do this way even though losing
weight is usually a good thing I think
if you ask someone oh did you lose
weight or oh it looks like you’ve gained
some weight usually those kinds of
things aren’t good to talk about so it’s
okay to talk about clothing or hair but
if you talk about their actual body
that’s not a very good idea yeah or even
things like you’re so beautiful I think
some people like that okay but some
people just feel kind of strange right
like oh he thinks I’m beautiful or she
thinks I’m very handsome or pretty or
whatever I think maybe is a little
uncomfortable right I think if someone
said to you Oh Dan wow you are so
handsome you might think do you want to
go on a date why why are you saying that
to me it’s well many people comment on
my hair oh the colors old ladies
especially old women and I feel a little
bit uncomfortable but your old women I’m
very relaxed so it’s okay right and I
think if someone said to me wow your
your eyes are so beautiful I would think
oh do you want to go on a date why are
you saying that to me it’s very strange
to comment on people’s physical
appearance unless you are part of their
family maybe a really close or maybe you
do want to date them yes if you do want
to date them then go ahead you can
compliment their body well thanks so
much for watching this conversation part
of the video in just a moment I’m going
to explain some of the natural
expressions that Dan and I use in this
video I’ll see you there bye
right welcome to the expression section
of today’s video I’m going to explain
two natural expressions that Dan and I
used in our conversation just a moment
ago about small talk the first word the
first X
is back and forth back and forth
now back and forth means going between
two things so for example you could say
we talked back and forth about going to
Brazil we had a conversation about going
to Brazil
we talked back and forth about going to
Brazil or you could say he pushed the
swing back and forth he pushed the swing
back and forth in the park this motion
of going between two things in a
conversation or in a physical thing like
a swing the second expression is the
words off-limits off-limits off-limits
means it’s something that you can’t do
you are forbidden from doing for example
politics is an off-limits topic or you
could say when my brother brought a
friend to my house for dinner he told
his friends my sister is off-limits you
can’t date her it is not a lot thanks so
much for watching this video and I hope
you enjoyed my conversation with Dan and
you learn some new expressions today if
this style of conversation and
expression videos are helpful to you
join our course the 30 days of English
where you can watch 12 conversation
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looking forward to seeing you there
goodbye