Learn English David Foster Wallace This is Water. with BIG Subtitles
greetings thanks and congratulations to
Kenyans graduating class of 2005 there
are these two young fish swimming along
and they happen to meet an older fish
swimming the other way who nods at them
and says morning boys
has the water and the two young fish
swim on for a bit and that eventually
one of them looks over at the other and
goes what the hell is water this is a
standard requirement of us commencement
speeches the deployment of didactic
little parable ish stories the story
thing turns out to be one of the better
less bullshitty conventions of the genre
but if you’re worried that I plan to
present myself here as the wise older
fish explaining what water is to you
younger fish please don’t be I am NOT
the wise old fish the point of the fish
story is merely that the most obvious
important realities are often the ones
that are hardest to see and talk about
stated as an English sentence of course
this is just a banal platitude but the
fact is that in the day-to-day trenches
of adult existence then all platitudes
can have a life-or-death importance or
so I wish to suggest to you on this dry
and lovely morning
of course the main requirement of
speeches like this is that I’m supposed
to talk about your liberal arts
education meaning to try to explain why
the degree you’re about to receive has
actual human value instead of just a
material payoff so let’s talk about the
single most pervasive cliche in the
commencement speech genre which is that
a liberal arts education is not so much
about filling you up with knowledge as
it is about quote teaching you how to
think if you’re like me as a student
you’ve never lacked hearing this and you
tend to feel a bit insulted by the claim
that you’ve needed anybody to teach you
how to think since the fact that you
even got admitted to a college that’s
good seems like proof that you already
know how to think but I’m gonna posit to
you that the liberal arts cliche turns
out not to be insulting at all because
the really significant education in
thinking that we’re supposed to get in a
place like this isn’t really about the
capacity to think but rather about the
choice of what to think
if your total freedom of choice
regarding what to think about seems too
obvious to waste time discussing I’d ask
you to think about fish in water and to
bracket for just a few minutes your
skepticism about the value of the
totally obvious
here’s another didactic little story
there are these two guys sitting
together in a bar in the remote Alaskan
wilderness one of the guys is religious
the others an atheist and the two are
arguing about the existence of God with
that special intensity that comes after
about the fourth beer and the atheist
says look it’s not like I don’t have
actual reasons for not believing in God
it’s not like I haven’t ever
experimented with the whole God and
prayer thing just last month I got
caught away from camp in that terrible
blizzard and I was totally lost and I
couldn’t see a thing
and it was 50 below and so I tried it I
fell to my knees in the snow and cried
out o God if there is a god I’m lost in
this blizzard and I’m gonna die if you
don’t help me and now in the bar the
religious guy looks at the atheist all
puzzled well then you must believe now
he says after all here you are alive the
Atheist just rolls his eyes no man all
that was was a couple Eskimos happen to
come onor and by and they showed me the
way back to King it’s easy to run the
story through a kind of standard liberal
arts analysis the exact same experience
can mean two totally different things to
two different people given those
people’s two different belief templates
in two different ways of constructing
meaning from experience because we prize
tolerance and diversity of belief
nowhere in our liberal arts analysis do
we want to claim the one guy’s
interpretation is true and the other
guys is false or bad which is fine
except we also never end up talking
about just where these individual
templates and beliefs come from meaning
where they come from inside the two guys
as if a person’s most basic orientation
toward the world and the meaning of his
experience were somehow just hardwired
like height or shoe size or
automatically absorbed from the culture
like language as if how we construct
meaning we’re not actually a matter of
personal intentional choice
plus there’s the matter of arrogance the
non-religious guy is so totally certain
in his dismissal of the possibility that
the passing Eskimos had anything to do
with this prayer for help true there are
plenty of religious people who seem
arrogantly certain of their own
interpretations - they’re probably even
more repulsive than atheists at least to
most of us but religious dogma this
problem is exactly the same as the
story’s unbeliever blind certainty a
closed mindedness that amounts to an
imprisonment so total that the prisoner
doesn’t even know he’s locked up the
point here is that I think this is one
part of what teaching me how to think is
really supposed to mean to be just a
little less arrogant to have just a
little critical awareness about myself
and my certainties because a huge
percentage of stuff that I tend to be
automatically certain of is it turns out
totally wrong and deluded I have learned
this the hard way as I predict you
graduates will - here is just one
example of the total wrongness of
something I tend to be automatically
sure everything in my own immediate
experience supports my deep belief that
I am the absolute center of the universe
the realist most vivid and important
person in existence we rarely talk about
this sort of natural basic
self-centeredness because it’s so
socially repulsive but it’s pretty much
the same for all of us it is our default
setting hardwired into our boards at
birth think about it there is no
experience you have had that you are not
at the absolute center of the world as
you experience it is there in front of
you or behind you to the left or right
of you on your TV or your monitor and so
on other people’s thoughts and feelings
have to be communicated to you somehow
but your own are so immediate urgent
real please don’t worry that I’m getting
ready to lecture you about compassion or
other directedness or all the so-called
virtues
this is not a matter of virtue it’s a
matter of my choosing to do the work of
somehow altering or getting free of my
natural hard-wired default setting which
is to be deeply and literally
self-centered and to see and interpret
everything through this lens of self
people who can adjust their natural
default setting this way are often
described as being well adjusted which I
suggest to you is not an accidental term
given the triumphant academic setting
here an obvious question is how much of
this work of adjusting our default
setting involves actual knowledge or
intellect this question gets very tricky
probably the most dangerous thing about
an academic education at least in my own
case is that it enables my tendency to
over intellectualized stuff to get lost
in abstract arguments inside my head
instead of simply paying attention to
what’s going on right in front of me
paying attention to what is going on
inside me as I’m sure you guys know by
now is extremely difficult to stay alert
and attentive instead of getting
hypnotized by the constant monologue
inside your own head may be happening
right now twenty years after my own
graduation I have come gradually to
understand that the liberal arts cliche
about teaching you how to think is
actually shorthand for a much deeper
more serious idea learning how to think
really means learning how to exercise
some control over how and what you think
it means being conscious and aware
enough to choose what you pay attention
to and to choose how you construct
meaning from experience because if you
cannot exercise this kind of choice in
adult life you will be totally hosed
think of the old cliche about quote the
mind being an excellent servant but a
terrible master this like many cliches
soul a man done exciting on the surface
actually expresses a great and terrible
truth it is not the least bit
coincidental that adults who commit
suicide with firearms almost always
shoot themselves in the head they shoot
the terrible master and the truth is
that most of these suicides are actually
dad long before they pull the trigger
and I submit that this is what the real
no value of your liberal arts
education is supposed to be about how to
keep from going through your comfortable
prosperous respectable adult life dead
unconscious a slave to your head into
your natural default setting of being
uniquely completely imperially alone day
in and day out that may sound like
hyperbole or abstract nonsense
let’s get concrete the plain fact is
that you graduating seniors do not yet
have any clue what day-in day-out really
means there happen to be whole large
parts of adult American life that nobody
talks about in commencement speeches one
such part involves boredom routine and
petty frustration the parents and older
folks here will know all too well what
I’m talking about
by way of example let’s say it’s an
average adult day and you get up in the
morning go to your challenging
white-collar college graduate job and
you work hard for eight or ten hours and
at the end of the day you’re tired and
somewhat stressed and all you want is to
go home and have a good supper and maybe
unwind for an hour and then hit the sack
early because of course you have to get
up the next day and do it all again but
then you remember there’s no food at
home you haven’t had time to shop this
week because of your challenging job and
so now after work you have to get in
your car and drive to the supermarket
it’s the end of a workday and the
traffic is apt to be very bad so getting
to the store takes way longer than it
should and when you finally get there
the supermarket is very crowded because
of course it’s the time of day when all
the other people with jobs should also
try to squeeze in some grocery shopping
and the store is hideously fluorescently
lit and infused with soul-killing music
or corporate pop and it’s pretty much
the last place you want to be but you
can’t just get in and quickly out you
have to wander all over the huge overlit
stores confusing aisles to find the
stuff you want and you have to maneuver
your junky cart through all these other
tired hurried people with carts
etc etc cutting stuff out because this
is a long ceremony and eventually you
get all your supper supplies except now
it turns out there aren’t enough
checkout lanes open even though it’s the
end of the day rush so the checkout line
is incredibly long which is stupid and
infuriating but you can’t take your
frustration out on the frantic lady
working the register who has overworked
at a job whose daily tedium and
meaninglessness surpasses the
imagination of any of us here at a
prestigious College but anyway you
finally get to the checkout lines front
and you pay for your food and get told
to have a nice day in a voice that is
the absolute voice of death and then you
have to take your creepy flimsy plastic
bags of groceries in your card with the
one crazy wheel that pulls maddeningly
to the left all the way out through the
crowded bumpy literary parking lot and
then you have to drive all the way home
through slow heavy SUV intensive
rush-hour traffic etc etc everyone here
has done this of course but it hasn’t
yet been part of you graduates actual
life routine day after week after month
after year but it will be and many more
dreary annoying seemingly meaningless
routines besides but that is not the
point the point is that petty
frustrating crap like this is exactly
where the work of choosing is going to
come in because the traffic jams and
crowded aisles and long checkout lines
give me time to think and if I don’t
make a conscious decision about how to
think and what to pay attention to I’m
going to be pissed and miserable every
time I have to shop because my natural
default setting is the certainty that
situations like this are really all
about me about my hungriness and my
fatigue and my desire to just get home
and it’s going to seem for all the world
like everybody else is just in my way
and who are all these people in my way
and look at how repulsive most of them
are and how stupid and cow alike and
dead-eyed and non-human they seem in the
checkout line or at how annoying and
rude it is that people are talking
loudly on cell phones in the middle of
the line and look at how deeply
personally unfair this is
or of course if I’m in a more socially
conscious liberal arts form of my
default setting I can spend time in the
end of the day traffic being disgusted
about all the huge stupid lane blocking
SUVs and Hummers and v12 pickup trucks
burning their wasteful selfish 40 gallon
tanks of gas and I can dwell on the fact
that the patriotic or religious bumper
stickers always seem to be on the
biggest most disgustingly selfish
vehicles driven by the ugliest this is
an example of how not to think the
biggest most disgustingly selfish
vehicles driven by the ugliest most
inconsiderate and aggressive drivers and
I can think about how our children’s
children will despise us for wasting all
the futures fuel and probably screwing
up the climate and how spoiled and
stupid and selfish and disgusting we all
are and how modern consumer these
consumer society just sucks and so on
and so forth you get the idea if I
choose to think this way in the store
and on the freeway fine lots of us do
except say thinking this way tends to be
so easy and automatic that it doesn’t
have to be a choice it is my natural
default setting it’s the automatic way
that I experience the boring frustrating
crowded parts of adult life when I’m
operating on the automatic unconscious
belief that I am the center of the world
and that my immediate needs and feelings
are what should determine the world’s
priorities the thing is that of course
there are totally different ways to
think about these kinds of situations in
this traffic all these vehicles stuck
and idling in my way it’s not impossible
that some of these people in SUVs have
been in horrible auto accidents in the
past and now find driving so terrifying
that their therapist is all but ordered
them to get a huge heavy SUV so they can
feel safe enough to drive or that the
Hummer that just cut me off is maybe
being driven by a father whose little
child is hurt or sick in the seat next
to him and he’s trying to get this kid
to the hospital and he’s in a way bigger
more legitimate hurry than I am it is
actually I who am in his way or I can
choose to force myself to consider the
likelihood that
everyone else in the supermarket’s
checkout line is just as bored and
frustrated as iron and that some of
these people probably have much harder
more tedious or painful lives than I do
again please don’t think I’m giving you
moral advice or that I’m saying you’re
supposed to think this way or that
anyone expects you to just automatically
do it because it’s hard it takes will
and effort and if you are like me some
days you won’t be able to do it or you
just flat-out will won’t it but most
days if you’re aware enough to give
yourself a choice you can choose to look
differently at this fad dead-eyed over
made-up lady who just screamed and her
kid in the checkout line maybe she’s not
usually like this maybe she’s been up
three straight nights holding the hand
of her husband who’s dying of bone
cancer or maybe this very lady is the
low-wage clerk at the Motor Vehicles
department who just yesterday helped
your spouse resolve a horrific
infuriating red tape problem through
some small act of bureaucratic kindness
of course none of this is likely but
it’s also not impossible it just depends
what you want to consider if you’re
automatically sure that you know what
reality is and who and what is really
important if you want to operate on your
default setting then you like me
probably won’t consider possibilities
that aren’t annoying and miserable but
if you’ve really learned how to think
how to pay attention then you will know
you have other options it will actually
be within your power to experience a
crowded hot slow consumer hell type
situation as not only meaningful but
sacred on fire with the same force that
lit the Stars love fellowship the
mystical oneness of all things deep down
not that that mystical stuff is
necessarily true the only thing that’s
capital-t true is that you get to decide
how you’re going to try to see it this I
submit is the freedom of real education
of learning how to be well adjusted you
get to consciously decide what has
meaning and what doesn’t you get to
decide what to worship
because here’s something else that’s
weird but true in the day-to-day
trenches of adult life there is actually
no such thing as atheism there is no
such thing as not worshipping everybody
worships the only choice we get is what
to worship and the compelling reason for
maybe choosing some sort of God or
spiritual type thing to worship via JC
or Allah be it Yahweh or the Wiccan
mother goddess or the Four Noble Truths
or some inviolable set of ethical
principles is that pretty much anything
else you worship will eat you alive if
you worship money and things if they are
where you tap real meaning in life then
you will never have enough never feel
you have enough it’s the truth worship
your own body and beauty and sexual
allure and you will always feel ugly and
when time and age start showing you will
die a million deaths before they finally
plant you on one level we all know this
stuff already it’s been codified as
myths
proverbs cliches epigrams parables the
skeleton of every great story the whole
trick is keeping the truth upfront in
daily consciousness worship power you
will end up feeling weak and afraid and
you will need ever more power over
others to numb you to your own fear
worship your intellect being seen as
smart you will end up feeling stupid a
fraud always on the verge of being found
out look the insidious thing about these
forms of worship is not that they’re
evil or sinful it is that they are
unconscious they are default settings
they’re the kind of worship you just
gradually slip into day after day
getting more and more selective about
what you see and how you measure value
without ever being fully aware that
that’s what you’re doing and this
so-called real world will not discourage
you from operating on your default
settings because the so-called real
world of men and money and power hums
merrily along on the fuel of fear and
anger and frustration and craving and
the worship of self our own present
culture has harnessed these forces in
ways that have yielded extraordinary
wealth and
and personal freedom the freedom all to
be lords of our own tiny skull sized
kingdoms alone at the center of all
creation this kind of freedom has much
to recommend it but of course there are
all different kinds of freedom and the
kind that is most precious you will not
hear much talked about much in the great
outside world of wanting and achieving
and displaying the really important kind
of freedom involves attention and
awareness and discipline and being able
truly to care about other people and to
sacrifice for them over and over in
myriad petty little unsexy ways every
day that is real freedom that is being
educated and understanding how to think
the alternative is unconsciousness the
default setting the rat race
the constant gnawing sense of having had
and lost some infinite thing I know that
this stuff probably doesn’t sound fun
and breezy or grandly inspirational the
way a commencement speech is supposed to
sound what it is as far as I can see is
the capital T truth with a whole lot of
rhetorical niceties stripped away you
are of course free to think of it
whatever you wish but please don’t just
dismiss it as some finger wagging dr.
Laura sermon none of this stuff is
really about morality or religion or
Dogma or big fancy questions of life
after death the capital T truth is about
life before death it is about the real
value of a real education which has
almost nothing to do with knowledge and
everything to do with simple awareness
awareness of what is so real and
essential so hidden in plain sight
all around us all the time that we have
to keep reminding ourselves over and
over this is water this is water it is
unimaginably hard to do this to stay
conscious and alive in the adult world
day in and day out
which means yet another grand cliche
turns out to be true your education
really is the job of a lifetime edit
commences now I wish way more than
[Applause]
you