Why You Dont Feel Confident When You Speak English
hey you want to speak english with
confidence right you’re tired of feeling
nervous
and feeling frustrated when someone asks
you a question and you can’t answer with
confidence
i totally understand when i was learning
korean i
experienced the same thing i had moments
when i would walk up to someone and then
suddenly forget everything that i wanted
to say
and then i realized there were six
reasons why i didn’t feel confident
and i want to explain these reasons to
you and give you the solutions
but before i do that i need your help
you see my goal is to help
one billion students a big number around
the world
just like you learn how to speak english
with
confidence but i need your help i need
you to do three things
very quickly i need you to like this
video i need you to share this video and
i need you to subscribe
one more time like this video share this
video
and subscribe can you do that for me i
really appreciate it
well i’m teacher tiffany let’s jump
right in
[Music]
all right there are six reasons why you
don’t feel confident when you speak in
english
now don’t go anywhere because in the
middle of this lesson there’s a special
challenge that includes
a reward alright so reason number
one you keep focusing on other people’s
opinions
basically you don’t feel confident
because you are constantly thinking
about what other people think about your
english
skills this is something i struggled
with as well when i was learning korean
why because every time i would get into
a conversation
and it would be my turn to say something
my
first thought was shoot what do they
think about me
shoot are they going to judge me when i
speak
korean or shoot man
i don’t really know this person that
well and if i speak in a way that’s not
good i think they’re gonna look at me in
a bad way
i was focused on what other people would
think of me
i was focused on other people’s opinions
whether it had been my
teacher or other students or people i
came in contact with that didn’t know me
i was focused on everybody else’s
opinions and that’s why i didn’t feel as
confident when i spoke in korean so
again this is one of the reasons why you
don’t feel as confident when you speak
english but there are some fixes fix
number one
figure out why you care so much
that’s right figure out the root cause
why do you care about other people’s
opinions so for example for me
i realized that i cared about
other students who were doing better
than me i was comparing myself
in my class i was the oldest in my class
at that time
and it seemed like the other students
were learning so much
faster than i was so whenever i would go
to speak in the back of my head i would
think ah
they’re gonna be like okay tiffany’s not
as good as us
and i would focus on their opinions but
the root cause was because i was
comparing
my progress to theirs i was looking at
how far they had progressed and then
looking at myself and saying
i’m not good enough so that’s why i was
focused on their opinions
but if you figure out the reason why
you’re focused on other people’s
opinions
you can start to stop focusing because
once i realized that
i stopped focusing as much on their
opinions
next redirect your thoughts you see i
had to learn
again it was not their problem they
really weren’t
bad at all they weren’t thinking
anything negatively but i had to learn
how to
redirect my thoughts so right before i
would speak in korean
when that thought entered my mind like
oh tiff
you know brandon’s thinking i would say
nope i’m not gonna think that thought
let me switch my thoughts you have to
actually do the same thing
when you’re about to speak if you feel
that coming on that
that that idea that hey people around me
are gonna kind of judge me
immediately redirect your thoughts you
can change your thoughts and it will
help you feel more
confident the other fix is find out your
opinion of yourself now this is
something very
interesting this is basically self
reflection
many times as human beings it doesn’t
matter what country you live in or where
you’re from
as human beings we care about other
people
but sometimes we care too much about
other people’s opinions
and we forget to think about what we
actually think about ourselves self
reflection stop and think hey
what do i think about myself realize
that you are learning a second language
realize how much you have learned and
you need to develop your own opinion of
yourself
this is going to help you feel more
confident because your focus will stop
being on other people’s opinions and
you’ll start looking at yourself for
example
i know i’m an early bird i know i’m very
productive i know i’m a very efficient
person
so i focus on those aspects of who i am
so if someone else comes to me and says
uh tiffany you’re not a hard worker
i’m not even affected i don’t even care
what they think about me why because
i know who i am i know my opinion of
myself when it comes to work
the same is true when you’re thinking
about your speaking ability
figure out your opinion of yourself you
can heal yourself
too have a good opinion of yourself all
right
so reason number two here we go
reason number two is you set challenging
english goals basically you don’t feel
confident because you have set
goals that don’t match the amount of
time
you have to achieve them let me break
this one down because
i saw this issue with many of my
students when i was in south korea you
see what happens is
students maybe just like you set
unachievable goals
stay with me a student would come to me
and say teacher i said hey yeah what’s
going on how are you
teacher i need to pass this test maybe
it was the ielts exam or opic exam
i said okay tell me you know when is the
test
the student would say teacher the test
is next month
i said huh so you’re telling me you have
four weeks
the student said yep i have four weeks
and i want to get a perfect score
now again i am a very encouraging
teacher i
make it a point to help students like
you achieve
goals but the student would come to me
telling me that she only had four weeks
to prepare for a major exam and she
wanted to ace the exam
that’s an unrealistic goal an
unachievable goal
again i knew her level so what happens
sometimes you set goals it’s very
important to set goals
but sometimes you set goals that are not
realistic for example you may say
i want to learn a thousand english
vocabulary words
in two weeks come on now come on now
now i think you are very intelligent but
in two weeks that
that’s really not realistic so instead
now when you do that you start to feel
less confident
because you have this goal and you’re
like shoot i didn’t reach my goal
so when you go to speak you’re like i
didn’t reach that goal
i know i can’t speak this is what you
need to do there are three fixes for
this
set and achieve small goals on a regular
basis
confidence is built on accomplishment
remember a few weeks back i taught you
all how to learn three thousand
vocabulary words in a year
now three thousand is a big number right
but notice
i said in a year and then during the
class
i broke down how you can actually learn
that many
words in a year we divided it by
52 weeks then we divided the week so
in essence every single day you need to
learn between six
to seven english vocabulary words
you can do that right because we broke
down that larger goal into smaller goals
so now there’s no sense of of urgency or
anticipation or frustration
why because you know you have a small
goal
that is achievable that you can do and
you feel more confident in your
abilities because
you start to focus on that smaller goal
so again students that joined the weekly
english words membership if you want to
join it’s weeklyenglishwords.com
students who joined that membership now
they’re seeing oh
all i have to do is learn a certain
number of words every day and i’m okay
and that’s one way of actually feeling
more confident
now another fix is right here focus on
what you can
change there are going to be many things
that you experience
as you learn english you’re going to
have many things that
may seem difficult or challenging but
you’ll also have things that you know
you can
change had a student asked me about
pronunciation the other evening
she and i had a great conversation and
she was like tiff how can i improve my
pronunciation
and i gave her a method i said hey when
i was learning korean
i would watch korean dramas and i
wouldn’t have a notebook
as i was watching the dramas i would
just sit there and repeat what they said
to myself but i was still enjoying the
program
i recognized that what i could do was
repeat or shadow the individuals that i
was watching
in the korean drama right so figure out
what you can change and don’t focus on
the things that you can’t at the moment
the other fix is right here visualize
success this is something that i love
doing as well the reason why you don’t
feel as confident is because you feel
like you can’t attain
certain goals but if you visualize
success
again on my wall behind me i have
all of my goals for the year why do i do
that because there are points and
moments in time where i feel like
i want to help 1 billion students speak
english with confidence but
man that’s a large goal so i’ve broken
down that goal
into smaller parts and smaller chunks so
periodically i’ll look at my wall
and i’ll see okay tiff your goal is one
billion students but for this year
this is all you need to do and that
makes me feel more
confident in my ability to achieve that
goal the same thing goes for you as you
are trying to build
confidence in your speaking ability
instead of setting
unachievable goals or really challenging
goals
pick a goal it can be a big goal but
break it down into smaller chunks
and you will recognize yourself suddenly
feeling
more confident now the third reason is
right here
you don’t feel prepared when you speak
basically you don’t feel confident
because your mind goes blank
during conversations and you don’t know
what to say i experienced this
so many times when i was studying korean
i felt like i couldn’t give
a very logical answer when certain
topics came up
i would kind of go to the back or lean
back a little bit so that no one would
call on me because i didn’t know what to
say
so i felt less confident now if they
asked me to give my
introduction or talk about my
experiences in america
i could easily express those things in
korean because i knew the topics
but whenever something came up that i
didn’t know about i
really felt less confident so i didn’t
feel prepared
now what are the fixes for this one here
we go
prepare and practice
now here’s where the challenge comes in
okay you see because what you have to do
is
prepare ahead of time there are many
different videos on youtube
again amazing english teachers i’m not
the only english teacher
there are other awesome english teachers
on youtube and they talk about different
topics
so you can prepare before you speak
english by watching some videos
by listening to some podcasts and
getting the information you need
now here’s the challenge you see today’s
video is being brought to you by
cat cabling now cambly and i have been
working together for a long time
i almost said a different word now
kaylee and i
we work together and i love working with
them because they care about you all
so here’s the challenge what you need to
do is in the comment section
tell us your favorite method for
practicing
what you learn that’s right we all have
different ways of studying
when i was studying korean i had a
different method than other students
maybe you have a unique method maybe you
get up in the morning and you listen to
a radio show
maybe you get up in the morning and you
watch something on your phone from
tiktok or
from another uh media social media
platform
whatever your specific method is for
studying
i want you to tell us about it in the
comment section
here’s where the challenge comes once
you put it in the comment section
i will select one individual that’s
right one individual who has
written down and explained his or her
favorite way for practicing english and
that student is going to win
60 minutes of practice time
with a cambly tutor i i told you it was
a great one
i told you it was a good one that’s
right one student is going to get the
opportunity to practice with a native
english speaker
for 60 minutes that’s right again we’re
talking about feeling more confident
and part of feeling more confident is
being prepared
is practicing so i want you to practice
with a native english teacher
so all you have to do once again is in
the comment section
tell us your favorite method for
practicing what you learn
maybe you watch movies maybe you write
something in your notebook whatever it
is
share it in the comment section and this
is why i like this challenge again
gives you an opportunity to practice
speaking in english by typing
and it also helps you help each other
because you may have a method
that another student can see and say oh
i really like the way
he or she studies i’m going to do the
same thing
so you can help each other you got it
all right good
cambly thank you so much for sponsoring
this video and for being willing to help
the students
improve their english all right so
what’s the other fix
again we talked about not being prepared
or not feeling prepared and that affects
your confidence
here’s the other thing you can do take
a deep
breath i noticed when i was studying
korean
that whenever i felt nervous or less
confident i would start speaking fast
not good but just fast and i would start
fumbling over my words and things would
come out very jumbled the grammar was
really bad
and i just didn’t speak well
if i had known this right here simply
take a deep breath and we talked about
it in a previous video i told you
all that it’s okay to say
let me let me think about that for a
second you see how i paused for that
long period of time
you can do the same thing if you need to
gather your thoughts
and if you want to speak with confidence
it’s okay to pause
but do a proper pause
like that alright so take a deep breath
the other fix
is be fearless mind
over matter push through your
nervousness again i get it i totally
understand
when you don’t feel prepared you start
getting nervous
you really don’t want to speak because
you don’t think you have the words to
say
but be fearless it’s okay
take a deep breath remind yourself
i am learning another language i do know
enough
i can give my opinion and start
speaking mind over matter
don’t allow yourself to be tricked to
think that you’re not able to speak
english with confidence
you can do it you have to be fearless
all right now reason number four here we
go
this is because you focus on your
mistakes and think you can’t
basically you don’t feel confident
because you are constantly thinking
about the mistakes you made in the past
man oh man when i say i did this
all the time i would focus on the things
that i got
wrong when i’d have a conversation with
my professor
or with a classmate or with one of my
korean friends if i made a mistake
i would think about that mistake for the
rest of the day
and sometimes even throughout the night
i would have a bad dream
why because i felt like i had been
studying for so long
why was i making the same mistakes maybe
they’re thinking i’m really not a good
speaker
you see what happened right i would go
to start thinking about
their opinions of me so many things
would run through my head and again you
probably experienced the same thing
but this is what is causing you to feel
less confident
you need to stop focusing on your
mistakes so here’s what we got to do
fix number one be nice to
your self this is something that i think
as human beings we forget sometimes
we have to be nice to ourselves right
you can beat yourself up sometimes no
one can see what’s going on but in your
head you may say to yourself oof
you’ve been studying english for five
years you still don’t know that word
or oof you’ve been studying english for
10 years
and you still can’t express yourself
sometimes these thoughts run through
your head
and i want to encourage you to stop
doing that
be nice to yourself again remember in
the previous example we talked about
encouraging yourself by developing an
opinion of yourself
remember you are amazing you’re learning
another language
for some of you your third fourth or
even fifth language
be nice to yourself the next fix is
right here
remember that everyone makes mistakes
when speaking
english it’s true even americans
even people from england like we all
make mistakes just like you make
mistakes in your own
mother tongue it’s okay to make a
mistake
no one is asking you to be perfect it’s
alright
just express yourself and i want you to
remember that
the next fix is right here list your
past successes this is something that’s
going to help a lot
you know right now you may be feeling
like ah there’s so many other things i
want to do
so many more words i want to learn but i
don’t want you to forget
what you’ve already done because when
you think about your past
successes instead of your mistakes you
get a boost
of energy to keep going forward learning
more but when you only focus on your
mistakes suddenly
you start to feel bad and less confident
but if you remember wait a minute last
year i was a beginner
now i’m able to understand everything
teacher tiffany says
i’m able to express myself and apply the
methods she taught me
wow i am amazing and i want you guys to
realize how amazing you
are so again list your past
successes now reason number five
why you feel less confident you don’t
feel like you are learning
fast enough basically you don’t feel
confident because
you think you are learning english at a
slow pace
and that you don’t know enough to
express yourself
again this is something that i’ve heard
from so many students
and some of my students in the past few
months have told me this
like teacher i don’t feel like i’m
learning enough i need to learn more
vocabulary what can i do i need to learn
more more and more
and i agree it’s important to continue
learning which is why you’re watching
this video and which is why i’m making
the video for you
but the truth is you need to understand
that going fast is not always the answer
it’s not about how fast you learn it’s
about
how fast you are able to put into use or
put into practice
what you actually learn so what’s the
fix again right here
monitor your progress this is something
that will help you a lot so if you have
a notebook
write down when you learn a new word
write it down when you learn a new
concept
write it down you can record yourself i
encourage students that are in my
academy so much
record a video clip talk about what you
learned
today talk about what a word you like
it’s important to record yourself on a
video clip or write something down
because
then you have a way to go back and see
your progress and this actually
results in you feeling more confident
it’s amazing how the brain works
it’s like a psychology uh like the
interesting psychology behind this
it’s not just about oh i don’t feel
confident uh i need to speak more
there’s a lot more to it part of it is
you need to monitor your progress
now the other fix is right here practice
regularly based on a set schedule
this is also important set a schedule
for yourself so for example when i used
to exercise
before the pandemic at the gym i would
go at the same time
every morning i would go at 5am and i’d
see the same people every morning i get
on the same machine
and i run and then i go play basketball
with one of the guys that was there
but i had a routine and this routine was
actually very helpful
you need the same thing when you are
studying
english and trying to improve your
ability to speak english with confidence
this routine actually creates confidence
because the more i exercised the more i
got up in the morning and followed the
routine the more
the the better i felt about myself like
tiff yesterday you exercise at 5 00 am
and then 2 days ago you exercised at 5am
you
know you can do it today and it was like
i was encouraging myself
and the same will happen for you if you
pick to
learn three words today learn three
words every day
you can say hey yesterday i learned
three words so today i’m going to learn
three words and tomorrow i’m going to
learn three words
practice regularly and it will make you
feel more confident and that will affect
your ability to speak
english here’s the other fix follow
through
do what you say and you will respect
yourself more too
this actually happened this morning
right before this video
i you know because of the pandemic i
hadn’t been exercising a lot because i
couldn’t go to the gym
and i still can’t go to the gym so i
bought a jump rope
but i hadn’t been using the jump rope
because i was busy and i
finally said you know what let me do
this before i start working
so i was jumping rope and i had a goal
and i got halfway to the goal and i got
tired and i said
ah i really want to stop here and i mean
no one’s telling me i have to do it i
can stop
but then i heard a little voice in my
head that said tiff
if you reach your goal and you
accomplish it you achieve it you’re
gonna feel
so much better about yourself and i
pushed through
i followed through and i did what i had
uh achieved that i went i wanted to
achieve you see even right there
even americans make mistakes it’s okay
guys
but no i did what i wanted to do
and i felt so much better after so the
same is true for you
you want to learn fast but instead of
trying to learn so fast
simply follow through with what your
goal
is remember small achievable goals
this will help you feel more confident
when you speak english
and now the sixth reason you don’t enjoy
learning english now i know this comes
at a shock
as a shock to some but a lot of times
you don’t really enjoy studying english
i think you enjoy these videos hopefully
i enjoy talking to you
but basically you don’t feel confident
because you don’t enjoy
what you are learning in english in
other words you feel
stressed whenever you study
it makes a difference when you don’t
enjoy
something the information you’re
studying has a harder time
going in so you feel less confident
because it’s not really
solidified in your mind so when you go
to access it it’s harder
here are the fixes for this one
celebrate
the small stuff when you learn something
hey you better be happy about it right
celebrate the small stuff
if you meet an american if you actually
have a conversation with someone in
english
celebrate the small stuff if you write a
comment in the comment section
when you participate in the challenge
and tell us
your favorite way of studying celebrate
that
you wrote a comment in english which is
not your first
language it’s okay to be happy about
that
it’s okay to share that with somebody
like hey
i wrote a comment in english under a
video and english is not my first
language
it’s okay this is something that will
help you enjoy
english more then do more of what makes
you happy
i tell you all all the time i love
sports i love
exercising i love cooking i love eating
i love these things and i love art so
when i studied korean
i made sure what i was learning was
involved or connected to these things
you need to do the same thing do more of
what makes you happy
find your interests and connect them to
what english
then if you realize that you enjoy
watching tv dramas in english
watch more of them if you realize you
enjoy english podcasts
listen to more of them i have some
students that enjoy reading books like
novels read more again find what makes
you happy and it will result in more
confidence because
you will learn and be relaxed and calm
so later on when you go to speak english
it will come out a lot
faster and easier and finally
watch an english program for fun
that’s right take time to just relax and
enjoy yourself
find an english program currently i’m
watching this is us
now if you’re watching this video and
it’s later on i’m sure you can go online
and find it but for those who are
watching it in real time
find this is us this american drama
it’s good y’all it’s really good it
comes on tuesday evenings
and i’m watching it but i enjoy it but
again it’s in english
but you may also enjoy it watch it for
fun
and you’ll start taking in information
that will help you speak
english with more confidence later
because the information went in
and it was very easy to retain the
information
now here’s the deal i do understand
speaking with confidence is not easy
speaking in english is not easy but i
hope these tips help you to have more
confidence
and to be more comfortable when you
speak in english now that’s all i have
for you today thank you so much for
joining me
remember to speak english but also
remember
to put a comment in the comment section
so that you can be a part of the
challenge
let us know what your favorite method of
studying english
is and i will choose one winner and that
individual will get a 60 minute
tutorial session with a cambly tutor
all right okay guys i’ll see you next
week have an
awesome day and as always remember to
speak
[Music]
english
you still there you know what time it is
it’s story time
hey i said it’s story time
all right so today’s story is about
a time when i did not feel confident
about my korean speaking ability
so when i was in korea you know i lived
there for almost 10 years and i got to
the point where i was an advanced korean
speaker
but at my church i went to uh a
multicultural church so there were
koreans there and there were foreigners
as in like americans people from africa
people from europe
we all worshiped together and because
that was the case
there were times when they needed
translators now i i never
offered to be a translator even though i
could speak korean remember i told you
i didn’t feel confident at times even
though i could speak so i understand
what you’re feeling
so one sabbath again i’m a seventh day
adventist so i go to church on saturday
and we call it sabbath
so one sabbath uh one of my friends
walked up to me because our pastor was
korean
he spoke english and korean but his
sermons were normally in korean
so one of my friends walked up to me and
said hey tiff and i said hey yeah
she said so we need an extra translator
immediately my heart started pumping my
heart started racing and i started
getting nervous
now i told you i was already fluent in
korean
but for some reason i started to feel
nervous and i wasn’t confident
she said so tiff would you mind helping
us out
i said ah give me a few days to think
about it and i’ll get back
to you she said okay but we really need
your help tiff and your english your
korean is good you can do it
she believed in me remember i said
earlier sometimes
other people’s opinion of you is not
really what you think
my friend was like tiff you speak korean
really well
we know that you’ll do great i was the
one that didn’t feel confident so i went
home
out to my apartment and i prayed about
it and i still didn’t feel confident but
i knew that our church needed more
translators so i said
okay i’ll do it um but i need like two
or three weeks in advance like i needed
to have the script or the sermon in
advance that i could
study it and make sure i understood
everything because i was going to
translate into english
he would speak in korean and then i’d
translate into english
so she was so excited she was like okay
tiff cool
so she put me on the schedule and the
time came for me to be the translator so
she sent me the script well the pastor
sent me the script
and i think it may have been like seven
or eight pages
i spent maybe about six hours
going over the sermon looking up the
words making sure i knew everything
so that i could be prepared remember i
said part of feeling confident is when
you feel prepared so
i made sure that i went over the entire
uh script and
knew the sermon i still didn’t feel
confident though
i was still nervous so sabbath morning
saturday morning came
saw the pastor great guy great guy so he
said hey tiff again all of this is
happening in koreans like hey tiff are
you ready
i said yeah you know it’s praying god
will be good you know god will help so
we get on the pulpit or on the stage in
front and
he starts with saying the prayer and
again my heart is racing
the entire time again on the outside
everyone sees
smiling confidence i say good morning
and happy sabbath everyone i’m just
translating
real time right inside i’m so nervous so
then he continues and he starts to give
his sermon
and again i’m still nervous but all of a
sudden i start to feel a little bit
more at ease in the very beginning i was
thinking
about oh man because i’m looking at the
congregation people that are in the
audience and
i’m like oh my goodness they’re probably
like tiff do you know what you’re
talking about
are you sure like all of these thoughts
were running through my head
but there came a point when i started
realizing that people were smiling at me
i was like wait a minute they’re smiling
so they must be understanding what i’m
saying
i was speaking in korean but it was kind
of like they were rooting me on
and their thoughts about me were good
and not bad
so i started to feel my heart
kinda go a little calmer and i started
to feel more confident
because i realized wait a minute they
don’t think anything negative about me
tiff you can do it i started to
encourage myself like tiff you can do it
the pastor and i started to have a good
time he even went off script
means he said whatever he wanted to say
off the cuff look that one up guys
and i was able to translate in real time
so we got through the sermon
it was a blessing i was blessed the the
audience the congregation was blessed
and at the end you know he walked off he
prayed and we walked off and he said
tiff i really want to thank you so much
for being my translator today
i said oh my pleasure pastor no worries
again he didn’t know that i was super
nervous inside
after that i walked out to where we have
to kind of shake everyone’s hands and
my friends were telling me tiff that was
one of the best sermons i’ve heard in a
long time
your translation was amazing now again
they don’t speak korean
but they were letting me know like tiff
we were blessed you did a great job
and then my friends who did speak korean
and english
walked up to me and said tiff that was
amazing you did a great job
keep going and i felt so much better so
one thing i realized was i didn’t
want to do it at first because i didn’t
feel confident
but i pushed through the nervousness and
i continued
and i prepared and i worked hard and
when i got up front even though i felt
nervous in the beginning
by the end i felt very confident so much
so that
i became a member of the translation
team so i was a regular translator for
our church and that never would have
happened if i allowed my nervousness or
my fear
to hinder me from going up front the
same is true for you you may not feel
confident at times when you’re speaking
english
you may feel like when you try to speak
in english that other people are looking
at you
other people are judging you don’t think
that
instead push forward push through don’t
let your fear and nervousness hinder you
from speaking
english you can do it just like i was
able to translate
from korean to english you’ll be able to
speak english with confidence if you
simply push through
and set achievable goals you can do it
and i believe in you
hope you enjoyed this story um yes i
translated a lot when i was in korea and
i had
many wonderful experiences and many
wonderful people around me
thanks so much guys i will see you next
week remember to speak
english and i’ll talk to you next time