How much is fear play into preventing us from grasping perspective, though?
Oh no!
Fear is everything.
Yeah, like if there is if there was one concept that I would suggest to people to take a daily
confrontation with, it’s fear.
The problem with fear is that it lies, right.
So, fear tells you, "Hey, you know, if you say that to that girl she's going to know
she has you, you know, and she'll never really be attracted to you if she knows how much
you attracted to her.
Don't say that, no!
How we get her is when she walks by, ignore her."
You know, fear tells you dumb shit like that.
Okay, you know.
So, for me, the daily confrontation with fear has become a real practice for me since about
three years ago.
I went skydiving in Dubai, right!
As skydiving, skydiving is a really interesting confront with fear, right.
So, I got to stand up.
So, all your friends…
What happens you go out, how you…
Oh sorry, drop my thing…
So, what happens is you go out the night before and you-you know.
You take a drink with your friends and somebody says, "Yeah!
We should go skydiving tomorrow."
And you go, "Yeah, we'll go skydiving tomorrow."
Yeah, yeah!
Yeah, right?
And you go home by yourself, you like, “hmm…”
You like, "Well, yeah."
I mean, they were drunk too, right?
So, maybe they not, maybe-maybe, I mean.
We don't have to go.
We don’t have to do it.
So then, that night you're laying in your bed and you just keep “hmm”
And you're terrified.
You keep imagining over and over again jumping out of an airplane, and you can't figure out
why you would do that, right!
And you're laying there you have the worst night's sleep of your life but you still have
the hope that your friends were drunk, right.
So, you wake up the next day.
You go, you know, down.
You say where you were going to meet and everybody's there.
You're like, "Oh shit!"
Alright, alright.
Cool, cool, cool, cool, right!
So, you get in the van and you don't know that your friends have the same night that
you had cuz they're pretended like they didn't it.
Like, "Yeah, man!
My uncle's a Navy SEAL and, you know, this is going to be great.
I've been looking forward to this."
You like, "Oh my god!
Oh my god!"
And your stomach is terrible.
You can't eat and everything but you don't want to be the only funk who doesn't jump
out of this airplane.
So, you get there and then you have the safety brief.
And you're standing there and the guys will tell you what the chute doesn't open what's
going to happen is, you're doing…
What…Would…What could happen?
The chute, the chute would open, right?
So, you do a thing and what you do is your first jump you're attached to a guy who is
going, you know, he's going to walk you out.
So, you go and you get there, and there's an airplane and nobody's stopping.
Everybody's still going.
So, you get onto the airplane and you're sitting there, and, you know, it's extra because you're
sitting on some dude’s lap, some stranger you sit on his lap.
And it's all you know.
You got trying to make small talk, "Yeah man!"
So, you-you've been jumping with people all the time.
Right.
You know.
So, and then you just want to make sure, "You got, you got kids, right?
You got people you need to see, right?"
Just want to make sure he's serious, right.
So, you get in there.
So, everything's normal.
So, you fly and you go up, you go up, you go up, you go up to 14,000 feet, and you notice
there's a light: It's red, and it's yellow and green.
Right.
So right now, the lights red.
So, then you start thinking at some point the lights going to go green because you don't
know what's going to happen, right.
And you wait, and it goes yellow, and the light goes green, and somebody opens the door
and at that moment, you realize you've never been in a freaking airplane with the door
open.
Right!
Terror!!!
Oh sorry, I spit…
Oh sorry…
Terror!
Terror!
Terror!
Terror!
Right!
So, you go and then, you know, if you're, if you were smart you sat in the back, so
you don't go first, right.
And then, people start going out of the airplane, and you go, and the guy walks you up to the
end of the thing and you're standing and your toes are on the edge, and you're looking out
down to death.
And they say, "On three!"
And they say, “One, two…”
And he pushes you on two because people grab on three, right.
And you go…
And you fall out of the airplane and in one second you realize that it's the most blissful
experience of your life.
You're flying, right.
It doesn't feel like falling, right.
It's like that you, actually, are kind of held a little bit by the wind and then, you
start, and you start falling, you falling, and you, there's
zero fear.
You realize that the point of maximum danger is the point of minimum fear.
It's bliss!
It's bliss!
And you're flying….
And you're doing it...
And then 20 seconds, 25 seconds, 40 seconds, and you have enough time to just kind of like,
"Ah!
That's that building I saw that morning…Oh, I can see the ocean…"
Right?
You start doing all of that, and the lesson for me was: Why were you scared in your bed
the night before Why did you…what do you need that fear for?
Just don't go!
Why are you scared in your bed 16 hours before?
You jump?
Why are you scared in the car?
Why could you not enjoy breakfast?
What would…What would you need that?
Fear is…Fear of what?
You’re now where to even near to the airplane.
Everything is up to the stepping out.
There's actually no reason to be scared!
It only just ruins your day.
You don't have to jump.
And then, at that moment all of a sudden where you should be terrified is the most blissful
experience of your life, and God placed the best things in life on the other side of Terror.
On the other side of your maximum fear or all of the best things in life.
You know, so that was…oh, sorry.
So, that was, yeah, that was, that was my experience with skydiving and fear.
All right, all right.
So, practically speaking…
But, I didn't like that take, I'm gonna do it again.
Back to the top.
I can sell that better.
I can sell that better.
When did you decide to do something like that?
Like, how does it work practically?
Do you call your wife and be like, "I might be dead tomorrow."
Right.
No, but that's what…
I never…
Just promise…
Yeah, I made a drunk promise, yeah.
How about this, so I jumped I had such a mystical powerful spiritual experience I flew home
and got my sons, and I went back and ten days later my son's jumped.
Right.
Now, that was a little different… …that makes me spit…
Because I'm scared I'm scared, right.
So, it was one…So, Jayden went first, right.
Jayden wants to do everything first.
So, I'm sitting there and I'm like, "Yeah, my sons are going to have this crazy experience."
And then Jayden went out of the airplane, I was like, “hmm…”
Then my oldest son Trey goes up and he goes out of the airplane, and I was like, "This
could potentially be the worst display of African-American parenting in history".
I was like, both my sons just fell out of an airplane.
Jump…jump, right!
Because I told them to and that…but again the fear again.
I was like, "Oh my god".
So, I told the dude.
I was like, "Listen!
I want to see them go out but I also want to see them land."
And he's like, "No, it’s cool".
So, this time we went out and we did the straight bullet.
And I just went straight down, past them, right.
Are you good?
Right.
Did the bullet straight past, pull the chute late…Oh, sorry.
It makes me spit…
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Pulled the chute late, landed and then video them coming down.
But it was like, they had the same thing, the same experience with the fear but that
I'm telling you the confrontation with fear is an absolutely magical way of facing the
things we have to do in this life.
You know, forget security live for experience.
So, with that, every morning when I get out of the bed, you know, I haven't fixed everything
in the world yet so there's always something to do, and in this film, I read an interesting
quote…the Siddhārtha Gautama, the Buddha, he said that "Good people have to get out
of the bed every day and try to empty the ocean with a ladle".
Right.
And I thought that was, you know, I knew that was profound and I paused for a second, and
I said, "All right, what the hell is a ladle?
Right?
Right?
So there, you know, I just…I touched it on my iPad, what’s ladle?
Oh!
It's like a big spoon…a big spoon, okay.
Like a soup spoon, yeah.
A soup spoon.
I was like, "Why your soup spoon".
So, trying to empty the ocean with a soup spoon, you know, as the mentality of how you
wake up every day to try to do good in the world.
So, for me I'm…uh…I'm really driven by continually trying to elevate my, elevate
my mind and elevate my spirit, and care for my body and to be able to love as many people
as effectively as possible with this mystery of life that I've been given.
{{
然而，恐惧在多大程度上阻止了我们 把握视角？
不好了！
恐惧就是一切。
是的，如果有一个 概念我会建议人们每天
与之对抗，那就是恐惧。
恐惧的问题在于它在说谎，对。
所以，恐惧告诉你，“嘿，你知道，如果你 对那个女孩这么说，她就会知道
她有你，你知道， 如果她知道
你对她有多少吸引力，她就永远不会真正被你吸引。
不要这么说，不！
我们如何得到她是当她走过时，不要理 她。”
你知道，恐惧会告诉你这样愚蠢的事情。
好的，你知道的。
所以，对我来说，从大约三年前开始，每天与恐惧对抗 已经成为我真正的练习
。
我去迪拜跳伞了，对！
作为跳伞，跳伞是一个非常有趣的 与恐惧的对抗，对吧。
所以，我必须站起来。
所以，你所有的朋友……
你出去会发生什么，你怎么样……
哦，对不起，丢掉我的东西……
所以，发生的事情是你前一天晚上出去了 ，你知道。
你和你的朋友喝了一杯，有人 说，“是的！
我们明天应该去跳伞。”
然后你说，“是的，我们明天去跳伞。”
是啊！
是的，对吧？
你自己回家，你喜欢，“嗯……”
你喜欢，“嗯，是的。”
我的意思是，他们也喝醉了，对吧？
所以，也许他们不会，也许——也许，我的意思是。
我们不必去。
我们不必这样做。
那么，那天晚上你躺在 床上，你只是不停地“嗯”
而且你很害怕。
你一遍又一遍地想象 从飞机上跳下来，你不知道
为什么要这么做，对吧！
而你躺在那里，你 的睡眠是你一生中最糟糕的一夜，但你
仍然希望你的朋友喝醉了，对吧。
所以，你第二天醒来。
你去，你知道，下来。
你说你要去哪里见面，每个人都在 那里。
你就像，“哦，该死！”
好吧好吧。
酷酷酷酷对吧！
所以，你上了车，你不 知道你的朋友和你有同一个晚上，
因为他们假装他们 没有。
就像，“是的，伙计！
我叔叔是海豹突击队队员，你知道， 这会很棒。
我一直很期待。”
你喜欢，“哦，我的上帝！
哦，我的上帝！”
而且你的胃很可怕。
你不能吃东西，但你 不想成为唯一一个不
跳出这架飞机的疯子。
所以，你到了那里，然后你就有了安全 简介。
你站在那里，那些家伙会 告诉你什么滑道打不开
会发生什么，你在做什么……
什么……会……会发生什么？
溜槽，溜槽会打开，对吧？
所以，你做一件事，你做的是你的 第一次跳跃，你依附于一个
要走的人，你知道，他会带你出去。
所以，你去那里，你到达那里，有 一架飞机，没有人停下来。
大家还在继续。
所以，你上了飞机，你坐在 那里，你知道，这是额外的，因为你
坐在某个家伙的腿上， 你坐在某个陌生人的腿上。
这就是你所知道的。
你试着闲聊，“是的，伙计！”
所以，你——你一直在和人一起 跳。
对。
你懂。
所以，然后你只想确定，“你 有，你有孩子，对吗？
你有你需要见的人，对吧？”
只是想确定他是认真的，对吧。
所以，你进去吧。
所以，一切正常。
所以，你飞，你升，你升，你 升，你升到 14,000 英尺，你注意到
有一个光：它是红色的，它是黄色 和绿色的。
对。
所以现在，灯是红色的。
所以，然后你开始考虑在某个 时候灯会变绿，因为你不
知道会发生什么，对吧。
然后你等待，它变黄了， 灯变绿了，有人打开了门
，在那一刻，你意识到你从来 没有坐过门打开的可怕飞机
。
对！
恐怖！！！
哦对不起，我吐了……
哦对不起……
恐怖！
恐怖！
恐怖！
恐怖！
对！
所以，你去然后，你知道，如果你是， 如果你很聪明，你坐在后面，所以
你不会先去，对吧。
然后，人们开始走出飞机 ，你走了，那个人带你走到
了事情的尽头，你站着，你的 脚趾在边缘，你
俯视着死亡。
他们说，“三点！”
他们说，“一个，两个……
”他把你推到两个，因为人们抓住 了三个，对。
然后你走了
……你从飞机上掉下来，在一 秒钟内你意识到这
是你一生中最幸福的经历。
你在飞，对。
不会掉下来的感觉吧。
就好像你，实际上， 有点被风抓住了，然后，你
开始，你 开始坠落，你坠落，你，
有零恐惧。
你意识到最大的 危险点就是最小的恐惧点。
这是幸福！
这是幸福！
而你在飞……
而你正在这样做
...... 然后 20 秒，25 秒，40 秒 ，你有足够的时间来想，
“啊！
那是我那天早上看到的那栋建筑......哦， 我可以看到大海...... “ 对？
你开始做所有这些， 对我的教训是：为什么前一天晚上你在床上害怕你
为什么……你为什么需要这种恐惧？
只是不要去！
16小时前你为什么在床上害怕？
你跳？
为什么在车里害怕？
为什么不能享用早餐？
什么会……你需要什么？
恐惧是……恐惧什么？
您现在甚至可以靠近飞机。
一切都取决于走出去。
其实没有理由害怕！
它只会毁了你的一天。
你不必跳。
然后，突然之间， 你应该感到恐惧的那一刻
是你生命中最幸福的经历，而上帝把 生命中最好的东西放在了恐惧的另一边。
在你最大的恐惧或 生活中所有最好的事情的另一边。
你知道，那是……哦，对不起。
所以，那是，是的，那是我 对跳伞和恐惧的经历。
好吧，好吧。
所以，实际上……
但是，我不喜欢那个镜头，我会 再做一次。
回到顶部。
我可以卖得更好。
我可以卖得更好。
你什么时候决定做这样的事情？
就像，它实际上是如何工作的？
你打电话给你的妻子，然后说，“我 明天可能会死。”
对。
不，但就是这样……
我从不……
只是承诺……
是的，我做了一个醉酒的承诺，是的。
怎么样，所以我跳了，我有如此神秘的 强大精神体验，我飞
回家带走了我的儿子，我回去了，十天 后我的儿子跳了。
对。
现在，这有点不同 …………这让我吐了……
因为我害怕我害怕，对吧。
所以，它是一个......所以，杰登先走了，对。
杰登想先做所有事情。
所以，我坐在那里，我想，“是的， 我的儿子们会有这种疯狂的经历。”
然后杰登下了飞机， 我想，“嗯……”
然后我的大儿子特雷上 飞机，他下了飞机，我想，“这
可能是非洲裔美国人养育子女的最糟糕的表现 在历史上”。
我当时想，我的两个儿子刚从 飞机上掉下来。
跳……跳，对！
因为我告诉他们……但又 是恐惧。
我当时想，“哦，我的上帝”。
于是，我告诉了那家伙。
我当时想，“听着！
我想看到他们出去，但我也 想看到他们着陆。”
他就像，“不，这很酷”。
所以，这次我们出去了，我们做了直接的 子弹。
我就直接往下走，越过他们， 对。
你好吗？
对。
子弹直接过去了吗，拉滑槽 晚了……哦，对不起。
它让我吐口水……
对不起。
抱歉。
拉得很晚，降落，然后视频 他们下来了。
但这就像，他们有同样的事情 ，同样的恐惧经历，但
我告诉你，与恐惧对抗 是一种绝对神奇的方式来面对
我们这一生必须做的事情。
你知道，为了经验而忘记安全。
所以，有了这个，每天早上当我起床时 ，你知道，我还
没有把世界上的一切都修好，所以总有事情 要做，在这部电影中，我读到了一个有趣的
名言……乔达摩悉达多， 佛陀 说：“善人必须
每天起床， 用勺子舀海”。
对。
我想那是，你知道，我知道那 很深刻，我停顿了一会儿，然后
我说，“好吧，勺子到底是什么
？对吧？
对吧？
所以，你知道，我只是……我 在我的 iPad 上摸了一下，什么是勺子？
哦！
它就像一个大勺子……一个大勺子，好吧。
就像一个汤匙，是的。
一个汤匙。
我当时想，“为什么是你的汤匙”。
所以，试图清空 拿着汤匙的大海 ，你知道，作为你
每天醒来努力为世界做好事的心态 。
所以，对我来说，我......呃......我真的被 不断努力提升我的 ，提升
我的思想，提升我的精神，照顾 我的身体，并
能够用 我被赋予的这个生命奥秘尽可能有效地爱更多的人。