BEST OF OPRAH WINFREY Best Motivational Videos Speeches Compilation 1 Hour Long
[Music]
everybody is feeding yourself on
the hysteria and the negativity you
gotta stay in the light
but one of the reasons why i was so
excited is about a wrinkle in time
because the message is that the darkness
is spreading so fast these days you must
become a warrior of the light and the
reason that’s so meaningful to me is
because that’s how i’ve led my whole
life
for these times the darkness is there to
show you your light look at what has
happened so if you put the focus on look
at what happened with the darkness that
showed up in parkland and the darkness
that showed up on the streets of
ferguson the darkness that showed up in
many many many many many many homes in
chicago with shootings and uh senseless
murders
it brings out the best in people it
brings out the best and so that’s what
it’s there we live on a planet where
there is darkness and light
i deeply believe is not that do unto
others as you would have them do unto
you
what you do is already done
that moment in the color purple where
she says everything you ever try to do
to me already done to you so the law the
third law of motion in physics says that
what you’re putting out is coming back
all the time regardless of whether you
know it or acknowledge it or not
i say to the my girls
all of the time that your real work
is to figure out
where your power base is
and to work on the alignment of your
personality your gifts that you have to
give with the real reason why you’re
here that’s that’s the number one thing
you have to do is to work on yourself
and to fill your self up
and keep your cup full keep yourself
full now i used to be afraid of that
i used to be afraid particularly from
people who say oh she said she’s still
fella hassan
she’s so close herself and now i embrace
it
i i consider it a compliment that i am
full
of myself
because you only when you’re full
i’m full i’m overflowing my cup runneth
over
i have so much i have so much to offer
and so much to give and i am not afraid
of honoring myself you know it’s
miraculous when you think about it
my life is fueled by my being
and the being fuels the doing
so i come from a centered place i come
from a focused place
i come from
compassion
i come from a willingness to understand
and to be understood
and i come from wanting to to connect i
mean the secret of that show for 25
years is that people could see
themselves in me
all over the world they could see
themselves in me and even as i became
more and more financially successful
which was a big surprise to me i was
like oh my god this is so exciting
but what i realized is
through the whole process because i’m
grounded
in my own
self
that
although i could have more shoes
my feet stayed on the ground although i
was wearing better shoes these are kind
of cute today too
so i could keep my feet on the ground
even though i could get more shoes and i
could understand i could understand that
it really was because i was grounded
i’ve done the
was doing and continue to this day
to do
the consciousness work i work at staying
awake
the reason why i was number one for 25
years
is because i figured out early on
there is no story anybody has ever heard
that somebody else hasn’t experienced
nothing
and i also figured out
probably maybe the first or second year
that all pain is the same
that a mother in somalia feels the same
way as a mother in seattle when she
loses her child
and the common denominator in the human
experience
is our emotions and our feelings and the
more vulnerable and open you are willing
to be with your story the more actual
understanding you create with other
people and the more powerful you become
people don’t think less of you for
sharing your story they think more of
you for having the courage to share it
what inspired me was an is continues to
be what continues to inspire me
is a
primal and fundamental desire
to fulfill
the highest expression
of myself as a human
i don’t want to die
not having
completely
burnt out
every
single possibility of my humanity
i just i just want to when when i leave
this planet i want everybody
did that
used it all up not another thing i could
do there wasn’t another person i could
have given of myself to there wasn’t
another deed i could have done there
wasn’t anything that you just wanted you
want to say i want to fill it up you
want to take this whole human existence
which when you think about it godfrey is
really pretty damn miraculous it is it
is it is when you think about what it
means to be a human being on the planet
earth right now that’s pretty awesome
so i just wanna i wanna i wanna take
that to the max i wanna say no need to
come back as a human
the day first day i went to school i was
in a classroom
by the time i was uh
you know six years old didn’t go to
school i was six years old because i
lived my grandmother that time sure but
she had taught me how to read read the
bible bible stories
so i went into the classroom
knowing nicodemus
shadrach meshach and abednego
i could spell all of those words i
thought i was you know i was preaching
to the to my kindergarten teacher
so
she was like who is this girl so
i was never placed in an environment
where i was ever made to feel inferior i
always felt like i’m the smartest kid in
this room
and because i was never placed and never
put in a position where i was made to
feel
less than i didn’t grow up feeling less
than you know
and the rest as they say is history and
the rest they say is history and it’s
all about what you believe you know i
say this to
uh when i do something on my network now
call life class
the fundamental
key to success is what you believe
is true for yourself not what you want
not what you desire is what do you
believe
you know you can say i want to i want to
be the most successful person in the
world but if you believe that there’s a
glass ceiling and you’re going to have a
hard time kicking through that glass
ceiling
you will be defined by the glass ceiling
and
the great beauty and gift of my life is
that i was never defined by the box that
other people tried to put me in
[Music]
the energy of your intention
is what determines your life
most people don’t think about their
intention they just think about what
they want to do
most people don’t think about why they
want to do it
but what’s going to come back to you the
energy that’s going to come back to you
is the real why of why you did it
what drives you to keep working so hard
you could you know you and i are in the
60s category and so when you’re in your
60s you know you’ve lived more than
you’re going to live yeah realistically
so when you realize you’ve lived more
than you’re going to live you can say
why not relax a little bit why not just
ease up why have you decided to even
work harder than you did before
because i think david that everybody you
know the thing that works for me
all these years whether it was the
magazine or
which i still have or whether it was the
show i could i understood that there’s a
common denominator in the human
experience and i want the same thing you
want which is the same thing you want
and you want what we all want is to be
able to live out
the truest
highest expression of ourselves as a
human being
that doesn’t end until you take your
last breath what is the truest
highest
vision that you hold for yourself no
matter where you are in your life
there’s always the next level there’s
always the next level to the last breath
so i feel that i always knew that i
would get be done with the show when i
felt like oh i’ve said as much as i
could say here
on this platform and then how will i be
used if there were if there were a theme
song to my life amazing grace would be
one of them
so i feel that until you have used your
value as a human being you’re not done
my biggest frustration is not just with
young women my biggest frustration is
also with young men young people who
think
that and i have a lot of this with my
girls in college
they think
that success
is supposed to happen like that
yeah they think
that there isn’t a process to it
they think that they’re supposed to come
out of college and have their brand
and um
i recognize now that i am a brand but i
was resistant to being called a brand
for many years because i was like i’m a
brand i’m not a brand i’m a person but
how i got to be a brand was not trying
to be a brand how i got to be a brand
was every day
making choices that felt like this is
the right move now that’s the right move
and now that’s the next right move the
next right move and so my frustration
with young women and young men is that
they think it’s supposed to happen like
this and they don’t understand that
there’s a process
[Music]
i always understood that there really
was no difference between me and the
audience
at times i might have had better shoes
but at the core
the core
of of what really matters
that we are the same and you know how i
know that because
all of us are seeking the same thing
you’re here at this fabulous school
and will go out into the world and each
pursue based upon what you believe your
talents are
what your skills are maybe your gifts
are
but you’re seeking the same thing
everybody wants to fulfill
the highest
truest
expression
of yourself
as a human being that’s what you’re
looking for
the highest
truest
expression of yourself as a human being
and because i understand that i
understand that if you’re working in a
bakery
and that’s where you want to be
and that may be that that may be what
you’ve always wanted to do is to bake
pies for people or bake cakes for people
or to offer your gift then then that’s
that’s for you and there’s no difference
between you and me except that’s how
that’s your platform that’s your show
every day so my understanding of that
has allowed me to you know everyone to
reach everyone and and there’s no way
that you wouldn’t because that’s that’s
what i truly feel the way through the
challenge
is to get still
and ask yourself what is the next right
move
not think about oh i got all of this
stuff what is the next right move and
then from that space make the next right
move and the next right move and not to
be overwhelmed by it because you know
your life is bigger than that one moment
you know you’re not defined by what
somebody says is a failure for you
because failure is just there to point
you in a different direction
if i leave you with nothing else it’s
just know this for sure
there is not one
thing
that has ever happened to you
not one experience
not one encounter not one crisis not one
joyful thing that hasn’t
happened
just to make you better and help you
rise
every single thing you’re calling in
whether you know it or not when you
figure out that you are calling it in
when you actually start meditating or
praying or doing or having a spiritual
practice which is the number one thing
you need if you want to be successful in
the world you need something that gives
back and nourishes you
regardless of what you call that you
need to you need to fill your cup so
that you can be so full your cup runneth
over and you have enough to give to
other people if you don’t fill your cup
you end up dried up
you end up tired exhausted and don’t
have enough to give to other people you
end up resentful every time somebody
asks you because your cup is empty and
now they want some of yours
[Music]
so your number one job your number one
job is to fill
your cup and make yourself whole
so for me the foundational base of
empowerment of entrepreneurship
of any kind of engagement the
foundational base of my success
of my well-being my wholeness my
everything
is knowing who i am and where i come
from
[Applause]
in my living room right now
is a painting that i’ve owned now for 30
years
you can google it
it’s called to the highest bidder
and it’s at the center of my house
and it’s at the center of my house
because it actually is symbolic of the
foundation of not the house but the
foundation for my life the painting is
by harry rosalind who was a genre
painter painter in the
early 20th late 19th century
and the painting is over six feet tall
and it shows a slave woman
on the auction block
holding her daughter’s hand
and i cannot come in the door my front
door or i cannot leave without passing
that painting i am reminded of where i
come from every day of my life and i am
reminded because i never want to forget
it
and in my library
i have a framed list of enslaved
african-american people remember i
showed you
who were held in bondage on various
plantations
listed in the ledgers alongside
the cows
and the horses
and the buggies
and the other property and i pass this
list every day
and often i stop in front of it and just
speak their names
out loud and their ages
jonas
11 years old 500
sarah
41 years old
900
elizabeth
57
eight hundred dollars
and i force myself to consider
the absurdity and the obscenity
of prices being affixed to each one
should they be placed up for sale
and i sometimes just pause before them
with a prayer
particularly before i have to make a big
decision about
one of my companies or
whether i move forward or whether i stay
still
it reminds me speaking those names out
loud
not only of where i’ve come from
but how far
i have to go
because of them
and it reminds me that i am never alone
it reminds me of what i’ve come through
to get through
i say to the my girls
all of the time that your real work
is to figure out where your power base
is
and to work on the alignment of your
personality your gifts that you have to
give with the real reason why you’re
here that’s that’s the number one thing
you have to do
is to work on yourself and to fill your
self
up
and keep your cup full keep yourself
full now i used to be afraid of that
i used to be afraid particularly from
people who say oh she said she’s still
fella
she’s so close herself and now
i embrace it
i i consider it a compliment that i am
full of myself
because you only when you’re full i’m
full i’m overflowing my cup run is over
i have so much i have so much to offer
and so much to give and i am not afraid
of honoring myself you know it’s
miraculous when you think about it
everybody has a different talent
and the reason we’re all so messed up is
because you’re looking at everybody
else’s talent
and wishing you had some of their talent
all the energy that you spend thinking
about wishing about being jealous of
envious of anybody else is energy that
you’re not only putting out is going to
come back to you negatively but you’re
taking that away from you
all your energy should be forced on what
do i have to offer what do i have to
give how can i be used in service
because dr king’s message of not
everybody can be famous but everybody
can be great because greatness is
determined by service and there is not a
job in here that you can do that you
don’t switch the paradigm to service and
not make that job more fulfilling i
don’t care what the job is if you say
i’m a singer i’m a dancer i’m an artist
i’m a teacher i’m a nurse i’m a doctor
i’m a janitor i’m a i’m a clerk
if you say if i look at this from how do
i use this in service to something
bigger than myself
it no longer becomes a job it becomes an
offering to the world
the first law is
the third law of motion in physics which
says for every action there’s an equal
and opposite reaction and we showed that
very beautifully in the color purple
when messily says to mister everything
you even try to do to me is already done
to you
that is not just a rhetorical saying
that is law that is newton’s third law
of motion
in physics which says everything that
goes out
is coming back it’s just like everything
that goes up is coming down may take a
long time to come down it’s coming down
everything that goes out is coming back
it’s coming back so
to answer the power of manifestation and
meditation what meditation does is sync
you up with the source
what meditation does is allows you to
literally tap into the power that
created you so that you are in alignment
with that
and so when you carry that out into the
world everything that you do
comes from the center of that alignment
that’s coming from the source that we
call god we call divine energy divine
intelligence whatever name you want to
give it we call life when you are synced
up with life
life just gives to you
[Music]
the number one lesson i could offer you
where your work is concerned is this
become so skilled
so vigilant so flat out fantastic
at what you do
that your talent cannot be dismissed
you know when i was a kid i thought i
was going to uh
be a social worker or be a teacher or
somehow be in an environment where i
would be connected and speaking to
people to honor that calling i had no
idea that god could dream this big dream
of
a television life for myself but
everybody has a calling
and your real job in life is to figure
out as soon as possible what that is
who you were meant to be
and begin to honor that in the best way
possible for yourself we have seen over
the years on the oprah show so many
people who’ve been able to rise to
success in their life and only able to
rise to success because they answered
the call lots of people think that it’s
about being famous or about being known
or about doing big big incredible things
what you’re going to hear today and see
through the stories
is that
sometimes the calling is
right in your own neighborhood sometimes
the calling is
something that
was just a whisper to you and when you
begin to honor that whisper
and to follow that
you end up being the best that you could
be
i actually thought at the time
that being thin
uh
made me better
uh my identification with form my
uh
wanting so
desperately to be in a size 10 gene was
so prominent
identifying with that that shortly after
this i gained five pounds
and i was invited to a party at the time
by don johnson remember dreamy dawn
johnson i was invited to a holiday party
and i did not go to that party because i
thought the five pounds
made me too fat
not good enough to be a don johnson’s
party sounds kind of sick now i know
but that’s what the ego does it is uh
it’s just it is sick it’s wily it’s
cunning it’s deceptive it’s an imposter
imposing on the real you
making you often think that you’re
something that you’re not
you’re not the shape of your body
you’re not your status
you’re not your position in life you’re
not the car you drive no matter how
fancy it is you’re not
your house or your square footage for
all of you watching right now here’s
another way to better understand ego
what i’m talking about eckhart taught me
this everybody try this from home where
or wherever you are right now close your
eyes
and
notice what you’re thinking
notice your thoughts
now
who is thinking those thoughts
can you notice that there is a space
where you are observing the thoughts
and where you are aware of the thoughts
that you were observing
eckhart says you are that awareness
disguised as a person
and when i got that
i understood the difference between my
true self
and my ego self
over the years we’ve heard invaluable
information
that in a moment of danger could be
life-saving
nothing i heard made a greater
impression on me than back in 1991 i
think we were beginning our fifth season
and a man named sanford strong came on
and shared this never forgot it rule
number one
and frankly it’s probably in my opinion
the most important
never
allow them
to take you somewhere else
never
if everyone in this room and everyone
watching this program has never drawn
the line
and made a decision
on crime protection
you better make it when they decide to
move you from crime scene number one to
crime scene number two because the crime
scene number two it’s going to be
isolated you won’t choose it you’ll be
the focus of the crime
i think what was so
interesting about that piece of advice
is at the time that we all heard that
we had been trained as women people
especially to believe that you just do
whatever they say whatever they say go
along with it and what’s important for
those of you who are watching right now
and
those of you who are on the internet
with us right now to know is that it’s
all about using your gut in the moment
and people who’ve survived horrific
circumstances talk about listening to
that intuition and every move being made
calculated on listening to what your gut
says
what the experts now say is do not allow
yourself to be taken to the second
location because anybody who is trying
to harm you
wants to get you to an isolated place
where they can do that without other
people seeing or knowing it so in that
moment of making the decision oh you’re
going to shoot me if you’re going to
shoot me
you have to shoot me now
rather than shoot me in isolation where
nobody can see you whenever somebody has
said something that made the little
hairs on my arms or neck stand up i know
that if that’s happening to me that’s
also happening to somebody else too
the way to make movies is to do stuff
that you love because you know for 25
years i worked on the oprah show
and
uh steven will tell you that there were
nights that i came home and i almost you
know it’s hard to even like take off my
clothes because i knew i was going to be
getting up four hours later but i never
really felt exhausted
like depl never i felt exhausted but i
never felt depleted so do the work that
comes straight from
the soul of you from your background
from stories that you’ve grown up with
from stories that bring you passion from
stories that you uh not just yearn to
tell
but that if you don’t tell them they
won’t get told and when you when you are
operating you know the single the single
greatest uh
wisdom i think i’ve ever received other
than when people show who they are is
that
the key to fulfillment success
happiness
contentment in life
is when you align
your personality
with what your soul actually came to do
i believe everybody has a soul and has
you know their own personal
spiritual energy so when you can use
your personality to serve whatever that
thing is
you can’t help but be successful so if
you do films that come from the interior
of your soul you do work you do art that
comes from the interior of you
it you cannot miss
it’s only when you’re doing stuff that
you think might make money you think it
may be
a
hit or you think it may
uh bring you some level of attention or
success that isn’t what does it i would
have to say that all of the great
wonderful experiences of my life that
have brought me to this moment have come
from working from the interior of myself
and so that’s why it feels so authentic
because it
it actually is
so when you do that you’ll win
and everybody has a different talent
and the reason we’re all so messed up is
because you’re looking at everybody
else’s talent
and wishing you had some of their talent
all the energy that you spend thinking
about wishing about being jealous of
envious of anybody else is energy that
you’re not only putting out is going to
come back to you negatively but you’re
taking that away from you
all your energy should be forced on what
do i have to offer what do i have to
give how can i be used in service
because dr king’s message of not
everybody can be famous but everybody
can be great because greatness is
determined by service and there is not a
job in here that you can do that you
don’t switch the paradigm to service
and not make that job more fulfilling i
don’t care what the job is if you say
i’m a singer i’m a dancer i’m an artist
i’m a teacher i’m a nurse i’m a doctor
i’m a janitor i’m a i’m a clerk about if
you say if i look at this from how do i
use this in service to something bigger
than myself
it no longer becomes a job it becomes an
offering to the world i first started
making money and it was you know my
salary
or my earnings
were
published all over the place i mean the
first year i was like really did i make
that much money oh my god
it was very difficult for me to figure
out where my boundaries were
because i’d grown up poor and didn’t
have anything
so it’s easy when you don’t have
anything and people ask you for money
and they say i need 500 you say i don’t
have it because i’m just trying to get
my rent paid
it’s harder when your
multi-billion dollar salary is now in
the paper and you get a lot of friends
and cousins you didn’t have before
so how do you set
boundaries for yourself i was having
trouble setting boundaries myself for
myself for even strangers people would
just show up at my door in chicago and
say oh bro i left my husband please help
me
and i would because
she knows i have it
so what i learned was is that
oh the reason why people keep showing up
is because my intention is to make them
think that i’m such a nice person
that
you can ask me for anything
you can get me to do anything i’m going
to say yes i’m going to say yes so when
stevie called me this time i thought i’d
try out my first no on stevie let’s
start big
he wanted me to donate some money to a
charity and i didn’t want to donate to
the charity
because
i have my own charities and i care about
a lot of people but the the problem is
when you you have money everybody thinks
you just want to give to everything so
every letter i ever get starts with we
know you love the children
[Music]
yes i do love the children but somebody
else is going to have to help the
children
so i said to stevie uh i said to stevie
no
um
as a person who has that disease to
please i was waiting for him then just
to say
i will never speak to you again
i will never call you i will never sing
a song for you
and he didn’t he just said okay
okay
okay it’s okay he said okay check you
later
and
what i learned from that is
many times you will have angst and worry
about things
and
put yourself in a state like someone
said this morning because their phone
went off they were mortified over a
phone i said really
you will put yourself in a state when
the other person really isn’t even
thinking about you
so
learning that i could specifically
determine for myself what the boundaries
were for me
what i wanted to do
give my money give my time give of my
service to who i wanted to give it to
when i did that i get to make that
decision and just because you get a
hundred requests a week doesn’t mean you
have to try to fulfill all of that just
because you have all of these demands on
your time and on you doesn’t mean that
you
have to say yes you get to decide
because you’re the master of your fate
the captain of your soul as william
ernest henley said in invictus and
understanding that really changed the
meaning of my life in that i was not
no longer driven by what
other people wanted me to do
but took charge of my own destiny making
choices based upon what do i feel
is the next right move for me
there was one woman out of all the
celebrities out of all of the
famous non-famous infamous people one
woman
from
who is she her name is tarai trent
listen to the story
i’m going to try to shorten it for you
guys okay tara right trent born and
raised in a village in zimbabwe 11 years
old she’s doing her brother’s homework
she wants to go to school her father
says no you’re a girl you have to
educate the boyfriend yes that’s right
that’s right the boy has to go to school
you can’t go to school so she starts
doing her brother’s homework
she does his brother’s homework he goes
to school he gets all a’s on his
homework yet he doesn’t know the answer
to the question the teacher comes to the
village to say what is going on here
this boy doesn’t know the answers but
his homework’s perfect she finds out
that tarai his younger sister is doing
his homework she begs the father to let
terrorize go to school the father says
no she can’t go to school finally he
marries her off she marries at 11 and a
half years old she gets married she has
three children by the time she’s 18
years old a woman comes to the village
from an ngo heifer international and
asks what are your dreams this is going
to make me cry finally
ask her what are your dreams
this child has never thought about what
her dreams were she says write down your
dreams she writes down her dreams on a
piece of paper and she folds them in a
tin can and she buries them under a rock
the first dream was to be able to go to
the school and go to a school in the
united states of america
and get a college degree she ends up
through some miracle of the ngo going to
the united states she gets a college
degree wow yes she gets a four-year
degree in three years terrorized trent
she goes back to the rock in zimbabwe
she writes her next goal on the piece of
paper she buries it under the rock she
writes i want to get a master’s degree
she goes back to uni and said she gets a
master’s degree by this time she now has
five children she’s married to a man who
still beats her incredible
she goes back united states she gets her
master’s degree after the master’s
degree she goes back to the rock in
zimbabwe she writes down her final goal
is to get a doctorate degree and last
year she became dr tararai trent where
did you find it where did i find it um
i found
her
in the in the nicholas kristoff’s book
called
uh
something the sky underneath the sky or
the sky and nico i found her in nicholas
christoph’s book
and i was reading the story
i had nicholas kristoff on the show
nicholas kristoff the famous new york
times writer
and
she wasn’t there she wasn’t a part of
the ch i’m reading the story i can’t
believe this book the story of this
woman as i’m reading the story
so when we go to do the show
the producers have nicholas kristoff on
they bring on other guests but this
woman isn’t there i go how could you not
have her there so we tape another show
with nicholas kristoff we go back and go
fine we’re going to find that woman
terror right trend this time by this
time she’s living in the united states
we followed her back to zimbabwe to the
rock
we pulled the tin can from underneath
the rock
and that is my favorite guest of all
time and the worst
um
i don’t have a worst i don’t have a
worse but the reason why she and as i
said this on my show the reason why tara
rai trent is my favorite guest of all
time is because she represents in that
one story of the little girl in a
village in zimbabwe who had a dream
and the heart and depth and discipline
to pursue it she represents everything i
tried to say in every show in 25 years
she literally through her life story
sums up the message that i was trying to
give to every single one of my viewers
you can
you can
keep trying
don’t give up you have to believe you
have to believe
over the years the century so many
teachers and poets and songwriters have
talked about the significance of knowing
yourself i know we’ve all heard to thine
own self be true shakespeare or
learning to love yourself is the
greatest love of all whitney houston
what i know for sure is
that in all the talk about loving
yourself you can’t begin to love
yourself or even be true to yourself
unless you know
who
you are
separate from your ego
so think about this for a moment you’re
at home listening watching me and taking
in the thoughts that i’m sharing right
now
and
there is an inner space that allows you
to perceive these thoughts
little not even a space i’m just using
the word space because there is no other
word there is
the
ability to perceive what i’m saying
and be aware of what i’m saying
that is where the true you abides in
that awareness in the very center of
yourself
and when you stray from that center you
get lost
and you make mistakes
i learned this the hard way your ego
takes over
everybody has an ego i used to think the
ego showed itself through um
someone being arrogant or
stuck up or haughty
or the who does she think she is
printing down a red carpet kind of thing
well
i’m in show business in the business of
showing myself
so i’m aware that there’s a lot of
egotism involved in this business and i
always thought that i
had my ego in check until i realized
that it’s not just the obvious it’s not
always acting out or showing off
in 2008
i chose eckhart tolle’s book a new earth
for my book club and this book will
change the way
you view your life and the people around
you and your world chapters three and
four literally changed the way i saw
myself and my ego
it changed for me what ego meant
and totally says that’s any
identification with form
meaning any identification identifying
with something that is not the center of
yourself that is possessions material
things cars
titles social status or in my case
identifying with the deep desire to be
thin
you will find true success and happiness
if you have only one goal there really
is only one and that is this
fulfill
the highest
most truthful
expression
of yourself
as a human being
you want to max out your humanity
by using your energy to lift yourself up
your family and the people around you
theologian howard thurman said it best
he said don’t ask yourself what the
world needs
ask yourself what makes you come alive
and then go do that
because what the world needs is people
who have come alive
the world needs
[Applause]
[Music]
people like michael stahlzenberg from
fort lauderdale when michael was just
eight years old michael nearly died from
a bacterial infection that cost him both
of his hands and both of his feet
and in an instant this vibrant little
boy became a quadruple amputee
and his life
was changed forever
but in losing who he once was
michael discovered who he wanted to be
he refused to sit in that wheelchair all
day and feel sorry for himself so with
prosthetics he learned to walk
and run and play again
he joined his middle school lacrosse
team and last month when he learned that
so many victims of the boston marathon
bombing would become new amputees
michael decided to banish that darkness
with light
michael and his brother harris created
mikeysrun.com
to raise one million dollars for other
amputees
by the time harris runs the 2014 boston
marathon
more than a thousand miles away from
here
these two young brothers
are bringing people together to support
this boston community the way their
community came together to support
michael
and when this 13 year old man was asked
about his fellow amputees he said this
first they will be sad
they’re losing something
they will never get back
and that’s scary
i was scared
but they’ll be
okay they just don’t know that yet
we might not always know it
we might not always see it or hear it
on the news
or even feel it in our daily lives but i
have faith
that
no matter what
class of 2013
you will be okay
and you will make sure our country is
okay
i have faith because of that
nine-year-old girl who went out and
collected the change
i have faith because of david and
francine wheeler i have faith because of
michael and harris stolzenberg and i
have faith because of you the network of
angels sitting here today one of them
khadijah williams who came to harvard
four years ago
khadijah had attended 12 schools in 12
years
living out of garbage bags amongst pimps
and prostitutes and drug dealers
homeless
going into department stores walmart in
the morning to bathe herself so that she
wouldn’t smell in front of her
classmates
and today she graduates as a member of
the harvard class
of 2013. nobody’s journey is seamless or
smooth we all stumble we all have
setbacks if things go wrong you hit a
dead end as you will
it’s just life’s way of saying
time to change course
so ask every failure this is what i do
every failure every crisis every
difficult time i say what is this here
to teach me
and as soon as you get the lesson
you get to move on
if you really get the lesson you pass
and you don’t have to repeat the class
if you don’t get the lesson it shows up
wearing another pair of pants
or skirt
to give you some remedial work
and what i found is that difficulties
come when you don’t pay attention to
life’s whisper
because life always whispers to you
first first and if you ignore the
whisper sooner or later you’ll get a
scream
whatever you resist persists but if you
ask the right question not why is this
happening but what is this here to teach
me what is this here to teach me it puts
you in the place and space to get the
lesson you need my friend cartoli
uh who’s written this wonderful book
uh called a new earth
that’s all about letting the awareness
of who you are stimulate everything that
you do he puts it like this he says
don’t react against a bad situation
merge with that situation instead and
the solution will arise from the
challenge
because surrendering yourself doesn’t
mean giving up it means acting with
responsibility
okay
many of you know that as president
hennessey said i started this school
in africa
and
i founded the school where i’m trying to
give south african girls a shot at a
future like yours stanford
and i spent five years making sure that
school would be as beautiful as the
students
i wanted every girl to feel her worth
reflected in her surroundings so i
checked every blueprint
i picked every pillow
i was looking at the grout in between
the bricks i knew every thread count of
the sheets i chose every girl from the
villages from nine provinces and yet
last fall i was faced with a crisis i’d
never anticipated i was told that one of
the dorm matrons was suspected of sexual
abuse
well that was as you can imagine
devastating news
first i cried actually i sobbed for
about a half an hour
and then i said let’s get to it
that’s all you get is a half an hour
you need to focus on the now
what you need to do now so i contacted a
child trauma specialist i put together a
team of investigators i made sure the
girls had counseling and support and
gail and i got on a plane and flew to
south africa and the whole time i kept
asking that question
what is this here to teach me
and as difficult as that experience has
been
i got a lot of lessons
i understand now the mistakes i made
because i
had been paying attention to all of the
wrong things
i built that school from the outside in
when what really mattered was the inside
out
so it’s a lesson that applies to all of
our lives as a whole what matters most
is what’s inside what matters most is
the sense of
integrity of quality and beauty i got
that lesson and what i know is is that
the girls came away with something too
they’ve emerged from this more resilient
and knowing that their voices
have power
[Music]
there’s a bigger dream waiting for you
just waiting
for you
to step into it
to step into it your life is big
your life is huge and we spend so much
time
wanting to be in somebody else’s life
and you don’t get honored
you don’t get revered you don’t get
celebrating wanting what somebody else
has
[Music]
because
that which created you divine
intelligence that dreamed you from
before your ancestors ever knew
they would become
your ancestors that which dream the seed
of you
wants you to know how special how
wondrous how mysterious how complex how
glorious how phenomenal you are
and you get no credit
messing in somebody else’s territory
[Music]
or trying to have
power
over something you have no control
another one of my favorite teachings is
the wizard of oz
when the wicked which is the west says
go away from here because you don’t have
any power here you have no power in any
territory other than your
own oh but you are the master of that
you get to be the master of your own
fate you get to be the captain of your
own soul and if you just manage that
if you just took care of your territory
all the glorious glorious glorious
wondrous
wondrous opportunities and possibilities
that are waiting for you so the question
is what are you resisting
what are you pushing against
what are you not allowing what are you
blocking because you have this idea of
who and what you’re supposed to be
instead of
leaning into the dream that’s already
been created and waiting for you it’s
waiting for you and the second i mean it
doesn’t it’s an instant thing it’s a
shift in the way you see yourself and
the power from which you have come
[Music]
practicing gratitude it is my single
most
important life practice i’d have to say
and i know with thanksgiving coming many
people think about being thankful
there’s lots to talk about
thanksgiving and blessings but
that’s kind of like going to church on
just christmas and easter it counts but
it’s not consistent because for me
gratitude is something that
is necessary and should be practiced
every day because making space for
appreciating what you have
opens you up for a happier more
fulfilled existence i guarantee while
ensuring that those blessings just keep
flowing this is the truth it’s a law
what you focus on in your life expands
so focusing on what you’re grateful for
increases positive vibrations and
feelings of joy just one good feeling
builds on another good feeling and
another and if you actively appreciate
all that you have in life no matter how
small it is what you
notice is that you end up having more
and when you hone in on what you don’t
have you never have enough so being
grateful i’ve learned allows us to fill
in the cracks and crevices between what
we desire and what we already have with
positivity so we can pave the way for
grace
to show up and lead to an even better
life so how do you make gratitude a
habit for me
the first thing i do in the morning is i
read some sort of spiritual
enlightenment that allows me to start
the day with a positive frame of mind
that will only
help usher in even more positive energy
and for me that is the daily word which
is christian based or the book of psalms
also christian mark nepo’s book of
awakening is just spiritual no religion
with a daily meditation
and rumi or mary oliver there’s
something called bowl of sake that i
love too it’s a spiritual sufi teachings
that you can download for free into your
inbox but the greatest thing that i’ve
ever done
is having a gratitude journal so i
started one over 20 years ago and every
day for years now i write down five
things that i am grateful for i believe
you gotta write them down because there
is power power power in the written word
and it can be anything big or small some
days those things will come easy
you know a chat with a close friend or
taking a walk in the crisp fall air
having a loved one cook you at dinner or
bring you a
cup of tea some days it might be
difficult to even think of anything
and that’s completely normal and when
things don’t easily come to mind
go back to your breath
because if you breathe in you ought to
be grateful
know that you have that and simply
opening your eyes in the morning and
having that breath is a gift
but every day i consistently write down
five things that i’m grateful for
sometimes it’s more than five but if i
can’t get to five i just go breath
breath breath
gratitude is a posture
of your heart
a choice and a privilege so i hope that
you’ll make the choice to initiate a
daily gratitude practice if you haven’t
already i’ve been saying it for years
because this i know for sure sure
appreciating noting the delights that
show up in your life
will ensure more goodness is coming your
way
after a year like nobody has ever
experienced i believe that the best
thing we can collectively do is to take
care of our individual cells now i know
that might sound oversimplified and even
selfish to some people but this is what
i know for sure that you have to feed
yourself with love and loving thoughts
in order to show up
more fortified and complete
to give other people your love we hear
about self-care so much these days but
what does it really mean well for me
it’s about engaging in practices that
fill you up in every way that means
eating foods that are both enjoyable and
nourishing giving your body the gift of
some form of movement every day
and surrounding yourself with people
whose energy uplifts you this is so
important
also creating space in your day or at
least just give yourself at least a
minimum of five minutes of stillness
that alone time is so crucial when you
can distance yourself from the voices of
the world
so you can hear your own voice loud and
clear that’s why
i have dedicated sundays as my time for
recalibration and renewal
so sometimes it’s just a simple walk in
nature
or
just sitting out in the backyard
all of it that alone time helps me
re-center refuel me for whatever the
coming week is and however that shows up
for you that’s what you need to do for
you i love how glennon doyle put it in
her book love warrior she said i have
met myself
and i’m going to care for her fiercely
so i know we have to be reminded as
women people to continuously make
ourselves a priority because when you
truly value yourself the world reflects
that worth back to you nobody needs to
be reminded of the importance of
self-care though more than mothers
so we all know that back in normal times
before there was a pandemic moms had so
much on their plates
managing the needs of children and
spouses and households and in-laws and
that’s why i have so much respect for
people who do it well
and now the pandemic has taken its toll
from juggling increased child care
demands to mental health ramifications
to economic strain from the more than
you know five million jobs of women were
lost since february of 2020.
so we know mothers are carrying a heavy
load on their shoulders
and that’s just another indication that
self-focus
on yourself is so important
is there someone you need to forgive
it’s one of the most difficult
principles of life to practice but it
can also be one of the most rewarding
it’s one of the grandest gifts you can
give to yourself
you forgive
and you become relieved of the heavy
burden
of resentment that you’ve been carrying
that’s weighing you down you become
lighter literally and things in your
life begin to fall into place
so as someone who has experienced abuse
during childhood i know very well
that the struggle to forgive the people
in your life who have hurt you
is is real and it’s painful
but know this it’s not about condoning
whatever it is that person did to
mistreat you
it is about allowing what they did to
affect how you live your life now
dr joel jampolsky put it to me this way
years ago on the oprah show was a big
aha aha moment that i’ve accepted now as
spiritual law when he said forgiveness
is giving up the hope that the past
could have been any different i repeat
that forgiveness is giving up the hope
that what would a quarter could have
should have happened in fact
it did not happen it’s accepting the
reality of what did happen
and moving on
this truth has been fundamental in
allowing me to live my best life it was
transformative you have to come to the
realization that what might have been
is not what is
easy to hear i know
and harder to do
you gotta sit with the hurt
feel it
it’s uncomfortable
but when you can rise up and just really
meet that pain face to face and then let
it flow through you
only then can you let it go and step out
of the hurt of your history into the
possibility of the present
i’ve carried this lesson from iyanla
vanzant with me for some time i remember
years ago on the show she said you can
accept or reject the way you are treated
by other people but until you heal the
wounds of your past you will continue to
bleed you can bandage the bleeding with
food with alcohol with drugs with work
with cigarettes with sex she said but
eventually
it’s gonna ooze through and stain your
life
you must find the strength to open up
the wounds stick your hands inside pull
out the core of the pain that is holding
you in your past the memories and make
peace with them so here’s the formula
accept what has happened forgive others
forgive yourself accept the now
that is the recipe to begin healing and
give up the hope that the past could
have been anything other than what it
actually was
whatever happened
helped to make you you
my hope is that you find the courage to
relinquish all your grudges because
what i do know for sure is that on the
other side of forgiveness
is
freedom the freedom to live the life for
which you were intended and the one you
actually deserve
[Music]
there are so many feelings that we’ve
all experienced over the past year and a
half
as a collective
so we’re all in it together i know we’ve
heard that before a lot of people don’t
believe it but we’re in it together
feeling the same things whether we agree
on what we’re feeling or not and one of
the abiding feelings i know
is the sense of uncertainty not knowing
for sure what is next so
our lives have been shaken up and
shifted to say the least which has made
a lot of us uncertain of what is on the
horizon when will we go back to the
office full time what is that going to
require me how long will we be wearing
masks how long will we be fighting about
masks when will all of this be over and
it it really is completely natural to
not have all of the answers so one thing
i do know for sure is that we all have
to let go
of
knowing
of having complete control
and being able to ready ourselves to
navigate waves of change as they come
but how do we do that
anxiety comes when we live in the
unpredictable nuances of the future all
the what-ifs you know i remember when i
was on trial back in 1998 for
disparaging a burger and had to sit in a
courtroom for six weeks in amarillo
thank you very much and in the beginning
of that trial i had so much anxiety
learning to stay focused on just that
day and not the multiple days ahead is
what actually kept me sane
so i think we all must practice becoming
more comfortable stepping into the
unknown and when those uncertain
overwhelmed
feelings creep in you need to make an
effort to stay in the present moment and
just be still
and breathe
and say to yourself i am here now and
right now everything is okay all is well
i’ll be well
and there’s nothing i cannot handle so
take some time to be quiet enough to
listen to your internal gps your truer
self and let the clamor of the world
dissipate listen to the whispers as i
like to say and then let
that guide you sometimes just the fear
of uncertainty can stop us from taking
the next step toward a breakthrough but
we cannot let uncertainty
just fester and morph then into doubt
doubt that your fortitude that your
determination that your values won’t
have your back as you navigate whatever
is coming next now they’ve been there
for you in the past they’re there for
you now and they will be by your side as
time goes on so look at where you’ve
come from how far you’ve journeyed to
get to the you that you are now
and you’re still adapting evolving to an
ever better
version of yourself hopefully that’s
what we’re all trying to do
who you are
and what you believe in can remain
steadfast and rooted enough to take on
uncertainty
there is so
much going on in the world right now
mass mandates are changing all over the
country as vaccination rates are
going up travel is coming back a return
to working in the office may be in the
foreseeable future for a lot of you and
as we look to this next chapter after
such a long and challenging stretch i
think it’s time for us all to think
about refreshing ourselves in a way that
allows us to keep what matters most turn
over what we’re ready to let go of and
make room for the new
in our world
in our lives so i don’t know about you
all but i am forever changed by all of
these months away from the bustle of the
world and i will forever more carefully
choose what has to have my attention and
what does not because i’ve learned a lot
of things do not so when we hit that
little refresh button on our computers
or phones it updates everything so
quickly and just like that so simple
sometimes it’s even automated so there’s
not even anything thinking about it
a refresh though in real life
as we know takes effort it takes time
takes patience so be kind to yourself
during these days check in be still
until you can hear and feel the answers
you need for moving forward
and always feel blessed
that we survived a pandemic
and we have another chance
to get things right
in our daily lives
and i would say
that the best way to begin to figure out
who
you are really meant to be
is to ask the universe
god that question
god how can i be used in service to
myself first and how can i then use that
service to serve the world
use your life to serve the world and you
will find that it also serves you
one of the biggest mistakes people make
is thinking that they have to get paid a
lot of money or even get paid at all for
their calling
you are here to honor your calling
whether you’re paid for it or not if you
can get paid for it that makes life
exponentially better
but if you are not paid for it that is
also really just fine because honoring
the calling feeds everything else you do
in your life
letting go of energy that’s clouding
your vision and holding you back it’s a
life practice that i learned long ago
that has freed me
so many ways it’s a fact that holding
grudges against somebody who’s done you
wrong or
replaying revisiting hurtful situations
in your head over and over only weighs
you down and prevents you from being who
you’re meant to be
right now because you’re still
energetically holding on to the past the
energy that you put into constantly
rewinding to the resentment why did they
do that why did they say that to me i
didn’t deserve to be treated that way
all of that only keeps you stuck
it will never change what happened you
gotta press stop
and reject the urge to keep replaying
so that you can then fast forward into
the now for yourself you know
a lot of people think
that holding on to things that
disempowered them
is going to somehow magically turn it
around
as i said in my message a couple weeks
ago about forgiveness
you have to release the notion give up
the hope that the past could have been
any different and you also must release
the idea that people would do what you
might do in any given instance this is a
big one i had to learn and relearn
before i actually got it expecting
people to do what you would do in a
situation only leads to your
disappointment
not theirs they’re going on with their
life
so let people be who they are and either
you accept it or you don’t
not doing that keeps you stuck in a
circumstance that actually costs you
time costs you energy and i can
guarantee that oftentimes the person on
the other side of the bitterness you’re
holding on to they’re not even thinking
about you
in fact they probably have just moved on
they certainly aren’t obsessing the way
you are think of it like letting go of
any bad habit that just doesn’t serve
your well-being
not an easy task
taking the road to a more enlightened
healthy existence never is so
this is what i want to ask you to ask
yourself
why
am i holding on to this
how is this serving me
and really think about the answer
maybe it makes you feel validated maybe
it makes you feel righteous
or maybe
taking on the pain is your way of
recognizing the injustice so that even
though it won’t be made right
it can at least not be forgotten
then i ask you
again ask yourself
do you want to be right
or do you want peace
this was huge for me the unfortunate
fact is that having both may not be
possible and also you may never get your
moment of righteousness so why wait for
it choose peace
what i know for sure
is that in this world time is a moving
on and it’s our most valuable commodity
you can never get it back
so staying in that loop playing it over
and over in your head of hurt only
amplifies your pain let it go exhale
make room in your heart for something
that is uplifting
surround yourself with people who want
the best for you you have the ability to
shift the dna of your spirit and control
how you perceive life so why not lighten
your load and let it go
[Music]
knowing when you know better you do
better we’re ready to move on to what i
think is another powerful lesson that i
started to get when i was a really young
girl having been raised by my
grandmother and then at six years old
being separated from my grandmother
being moved to milwaukee and suddenly in
a foreign environment for myself i
remember walking into that new space and
recognizing that
in many ways i was alone which is a
terrible feeling if you’re six years old
but i have always had the deep
understanding for myself
that if anything was going to move
forward in my life that i was going to
have to be responsible for making that
happen
and
i know that to be true now and can
articulate it as you are responsible
for your
life and if you’re sitting around
waiting on somebody to save you to fix
you to even help you
you are wasting your time because only
you have the power to take
responsibility to move your life forward
and the sooner you get that the sooner
your life gets into gear this is what i
know from doing 25 years and thousands
and thousands of interviews on the oprah
show
it does not matter where you come from
i have seen people come out of the
desert walk across the desert being born
in the most dire circumstances doesn’t
matter what your mama did whether she
did or had a phd or no d
what matters is now this moment and your
willingness to see this moment for what
it is accept it
forgive the past take responsibility
and move forward
[Music]
[Music]
you