Vulnerability Saves
[Music]
over
70 million people worldwide
stutter and i am one of them
but the weird thing is is that i love
public speaking
that’s where it gets a little
tricky i want
to talk to you about how vulnerability
saves
see i become vulnerable with almost
everyone
that i meet because my stutter can be so
unpredictable
for instance i struggle with the letter
t
and my name is
a terrell
because of this my stutter is often
the first impression that i make and the
feeling of
anguish is the first impression
i receive of others
i can see the the agony on your faces as
you
try to hold yourself back from finishing
my sentences
and by the way it’s it’s more than just
finishing my sentences
you are taking my words and making them
yours but i don’t need
to be rescued in fact it’s the
inability for me to hide my
vulnerability
is what saved me
but it happened always see
years ago i had just gotten engaged i
was so excited
and telling everyone and my boss
at the time announced it to the entire
staff
man that was a beautiful day
most congratulated me
but a few of course gave me their
condolences
and then he continues to say how did you
ask her
a fair question right
everyone loves a good
proposal story
but then he he continues to say
and i quote did you say
will you marry me
my heart dropped
see i thought he was was celebrating
with me but instead he was
mocking me
the next 15 seconds felt like
15 hours as they all laughed
it took me three years to quit that job
three years but
that day that i quit changed me it
changed my view
of my weakness i began a journey of
redefining my stutter
after all we all have weaknesses that we
hide or at least try to but it’s hard to
keep
my weakness a secret when it comes out
every time
i say my name
my stutter forces me to become
vulnerable with everyone
that i meet so i needed to embrace it
to begin my journey i felt like i needed
to call out
my weakness to minimize his power
but that’s not being vulnerable no
that’s
being defensive i was
transparent sharing pieces of me in a
controlled way
a part of what i was hiding was anger i
was
angry at the world
for my stutter
it felt unfair i’m smart
likeable even but my stutter crushed
my confidence
one day though i had enough i had enough
and i took
a drastic step ready wait for it
i bought a journal and i pulled out my
fear
anger and resentment in it
this gave me the clarity that i needed
to be my
unpolished and unprocessed version of
myself
but writing in the journal wasn’t enough
nope i needed to do more because no one
would read that
so i took the next logical step for
a millennial i made a youtube video
and i shared how my four year old self
learned that he was different from a
random little girl
in the grocery store
i saw what one act was doing
my vulnerability really was saving
others
see i knew i was changing the way that i
was thinking
but what i hadn’t counted on was the
influence that my vulnerability would
have on others
because i became vulnerable without
hesitation or agenda
it formed a safe place for others to do
the same
we all have weaknesses
and they suck
but our vulnerability saves and when we
find the strength
to be unpolished and authentically
vulnerable we don’t just
change our lives but the lives of those
around us
we realize that we are not
alone hiding our weakness
breeds isolation and loneliness
but redirecting our weakness into
vulnerability
breeds deep community
i mean can we truly connect with the
world if we don’t become vulnerable
no because it is our weaknesses that
allow us to
truly connect
and these weaknesses are our shared
challenges
keeping these challenges to ourselves
breeds isolation
allowing us to live life with closed
hands
but if we become vulnerable
open ourselves up
and open our hands
only then can we save ourselves
and save others
thank you
you