Change your Heroes Change Your Life
[Music]
as a young boy
on my way to bed slipping quietly past
my parents bedroom door
my dad’s light was always on he sat
propped up on the king-sized bed like a
sentry
guarding the night glasses perched on
the edge of his nose he was typically
reading the biography of a great leader
over time dad became a terrific leader
himself
building a company recognized as one of
the hundred best places to work in
canada
he was my hero my grandfather was
also my hero in 1911
he designed what was then the tallest
building in the british empire
later he was inducted into the canadian
business hall of fame both
men were visionary but more importantly
they were known for their integrity
i wanted to be like them and to one day
lead our family real estate business
i began following their footsteps
almost unconsciously our heroes shape
our lives
our dreams our character
as an aspiring leader i took on new
heroes to emulate
the two most prominent were vince
lombardi and winston churchill
one had a super bowl ring the other led
the allies to victory during world war
ii i adopted their mantras
winning is not the most important thing
it’s the only thing
never never never give up
the problem was i wasn’t playing
football nor was i at war
additionally i was in a hurry to make my
mark
but as warren buffett has recently noted
the key to
everything is patience you get the
chicken by hatching the egg not by
smashing it
unfortunately early in my career i
carried a hammer a lot and i smashed a
lot of eggs
for example shortly after joining our
family firm
i prepared a career plan designed to
equip me for the president’s office
within 10 years
with my dad’s support i confidently
presented it to my uncle
the company’s ceo much to my surprise
he insisted that i couldn’t be ready for
at least 20 years
he dismissed me as presumptuous
discussion disintegrated into a heated
argument
as a result our relationship never
recovered and i was
dismissed from the company i forfeited
my opportunity to lead a company that
might one day become a global enterprise
my career was in tatters
this forced me to rethink a lot of
things as i
tried to put my life back together in
the 25 years since
i’ve served as an advisor to hundreds of
family enterprise successors
as i’ve mentored them i’ve come to
realize that the mistakes that i made
they were common ones
what a difference it could have made had
i chosen different heroes
so i did change your heroes
change your life let me tell you about
three who’ve inspired me
first john wooden the legendary coach
of the ucla men’s basketball team he was
extraordinarily patient every season
first day of practice he’d explained to
the players the proper way to put on
athletic socks
most of the team considered this
ridiculous can you imagine john wooden
at 5 foot 10
trying to explain to kareem abdul-jabbar
at seven foot two how to put on his
socks
it took a lot of patience to go through
this ritual and to explain why it was
even important
coach wouldn’t explain the value of this
as follows
he said gentlemen if we want to win a
national championship
we need to play better than our
opposition
to do that we need to practice with more
intensity
to do that we need to avoid getting
blisters on our feet
and to do that we need to put on our
socks properly
what an incredible example of patience
since adopting john wooden is one of my
heroes i’ve been cultivating more
patience
in my own life had i done that earlier
the encounter with my uncle perhaps my
entire career
could have been radically different
now let’s consider benjamin franklin
best known as one of america’s founding
fathers
he was also an entrepreneurial leader
and a diplomat
as a scientist he’s credited with
discovering electricity and with
inventing bifocals
but for me his most notable achievement
was his pursuit of humility
as a young man one of franklin’s friends
observed that ben could be a
jerk in conversation and always had to
be right
he could have been describing me as a
young man
early married that’s exactly how i was
just ask my wife but franklin
prodded by his friend’s bold critique
decided to mend his
ways he came to realize that humility
properly understood is not thinking less
of yourself
it’s thinking of yourself less
he made a commitment to cultivate
humility
and to do that he resolved to deny
himself the privilege of
ever disagreeing with anyone
with this remarkable approach franklin
found that his opinions were much more
readily received by others
he also became more open to other
people’s ideas and opinions
consequently as an elder statesman
during the drafting of the u.s
constitution
he was successful in diffusing arguments
and building
consensus adopting this approach myself
has wrought enormous changes in my life
and my heart
i’m now more curious less abrasive less
opinionated
even when i disagree i bite my tongue
and try and find something that i can
agree with
this has dramatically improved my
relationships with our adult children
with my wife with everyone
it’s my little secret nobody else knows
that i have this ninja move that’s
changing me from the inside out
lastly let’s think about walt disney he
can teach us a lot about
critical thinking earlier in my career
i often cross swords with members of our
senior executive
instead of attacking problems i attacked
people
this ultimately destroyed my credibility
and many of my working relationships
in hindsight i’ve come to realize that i
had allowed a critical spirit
to totally eclipse my critical thinking
skills
in contrast disney was a master of
critical thinking
just prior to the opening of the pirates
of the caribbean at disneyland
walt was making a last-minute inspection
in the area depicting new orleans he
felt something was missing that could
make it
more authentic he asked his team
does it look right does it sound right
does it smell right does it feel right
everything checked out but walt felt
something was still missing what is it
he asked
finally one of the young employees spoke
up mr disney
i grew up in the south on a night like
this
there ought to be lightning bugs you
know the tiny little energy superstars
disney’s face lit up that’s it he said
and so they
imported live lightning bugs at least
until they could work out a scheme
to imitate them did you notice in this
scenario
walt asked a lot of questions without
criticizing others
since adopting disney is one of my
heroes i’ve been cultivating my critical
thinking skills
learning to attack problems rather than
people
becoming hard on ideas soft
on people
john wooden benjamin franklin and walt
disney are
all heroes worth emulating
none of them are perfect none of us are
yet each day they inspire and tutor me
teaching me about patience humility and
critical thinking
just like the biographies my dad would
read these heroic
figures have become my virtual mentors
helping me to become a better person
i invite you to think about who your
heroes are
is it time for a shift in thinking or a
new perspective
the good news is it’s never too late
change your heroes and you will change
your life thank you
you