The era of the bully is over

i’ve always hated bullies

since being the uh the fat jewish kid at

school that never quite

fit in and then becoming the trainee who

realized i could do something about

these behaviors

i’ve always hated bullies and so i was

pretty lucky

when i got to be part of an organization

that meant we could do something about

it

now actually this organization is a

trainee organization and it was the

uh team before me when i was just vice

president who thought we should do a

census

we wanted to ask trainees how they felt

about things

kind of a state of the union type thing

so we asked them all the questions where

do you live where do you work

and one of the things that i really

wanted to look at were behaviors like

bullying undermining and harassment

now we’re not daft and so the reason we

got this data was because we said look

we also will have a price draw and give

you two grand

if you win it so we actually got a

pretty good amount of data out of it

now i knew what i thought would happen

i knew what i thought it would say it

would say that some people are unhappy

and some people were pretty happy

but i was shocked by some of the the

data we got

now one of the other reasons that we got

such good data was

that we’d actually said to these

trainees we’re gonna make you a pledge

number one

we’re gonna keep it anonymous so that no

one can go it’s you you said this

and number two we promise that whatever

we find we’ll do something about

if it says that we’re wasting our time

bark up the wrong tree we’ll just go to

the pub and say look okay fine it’s not

a problem

but if we find something something

meaningful something we can do something

about we’ll do it

and this data came back and it blew my

mind

but people use words like bullying and

harassment undermining and they’re

pretty emotive words and they mean very

different things

so uh they need to be defined and

bullying is where someone uses

power to make you feel frightened or

afraid and do something you don’t want

to do

okay i’m your boss and you’re not gonna

have lunch today

okay undermining is far more subversive

undermining

is where you make someone feel small

worthless

powerless like they have no value and

harassment

well harassment are those protected

characteristics we talk about age

gender sexuality and so on and we asked

two really powerful questions we asked

whether or not people had uh experienced

those things

in the month pre pre proceeding the the

census and if they’d ever perceive them

one of the other big challenges people

say is well perception

it’s all in the eye of the beholder but

but is it really i think that’s one of

the more powerful things because

actually and this is one of the things

that always

comes up when we talk about these

behaviors is uh

if i’m chatting to you and you’re my

trainee and

and we get on really well and i just

tell you just man up just man up

and we have a laugh and it’s great and

everyone laughs except for that one

medical student at the back of the room

that one nurse

in theater who goes i can’t believe he

spoke to that person that way

i can’t i can’t believe he made him feel

that way

and so actually perception is really

powerful and we had some data that

showed that there was

a problem with these behaviors but don’t

get me wrong this is not

a trainee problem there’s loads of other

surveys out there and i could if i want

to put loads of graphs up to show that

everyone experiences because this isn’t

a trainee problem this is a cultural

problem

and so to fix it we need to change

culture

now here’s the thing i believe that

training

should be like family so your mum and

dad

loved you i hope

and what that meant was that sometimes

they rewarded you

you’ve done really well good for you

here’s here’s a present

and sometimes they told you go to your

room and you

mum but the next day you knew that

they still loved you they knew what was

best for you and that’s kind of the

relationship you had with your parents

you would hope

but here’s the thing a couple of years

ago someone turned around to parents and

said um

don’t hit your kids not only don’t hit

your kids

if you hit your children that’s abuse

you’re a child abuser what

yeah it’s bad parenting to hit your kids

and so what happened well the parents

said well

my my parents hit me and their parents

hit them

so does that make me a bad parent and my

parents were bad parents

in fact were all parents preceding this

press release bad parents

and what we say is no it’s not like that

at all because if you make it a blame

thing

if you make it a them and us thing a

trainee and a trainer thing or a doctor

and a nurse thing

then instantly it becomes a blame thing

and so of course people are going to

take it personally

you’re a bad parent you’re a bad trainer

you’re a bad nurse or a bad

person what we’re saying is actually no

we just know that things have changed

it’s been a paradigm shift and we know

that there are better

ways of doing things there are better

ways of training than making someone

feel small and building them up again

there’s better ways of of educating

someone than

bashing the knowledge into their head

because actually that does work

there are just better ways of doing it

that means that everyone feels better

about it

but if you think about other campaigns

to change culture if you think about

smoking or seat belts

this is going to take a generation

because it’s not easy because you know

what

you have to reflect i’m an orthopedic

surgeon i’ve reflected

and when when you reflect

that always gets a laugh when when you

reflect you realize

oh i’ve done this too i’ve done this

too and and i try to be better at work

but you know what i i’ll share something

with you

i still do it sometimes sometimes i put

my foot in it

more often than not i put my foot in it

but the fact is

that the hardest bit is admitting that

you have to change

and that maybe even the best of you and

the worst of you

can do a bit better can change but big

changes

is nearly impossible everyone stop

smoking

problem solved it’s never going to

happen so what you have to do

is small changes tectonic

change no one here will know that the

tectonic plates under your feet are

moving but they are

and you have this slow movement and

without realizing it the world is

changing

under your feet and so that’s what you

need to do and the best way to do it

is to start with yourself so you say i’m

looking in the mirror next time i say

something stupid at work or something

hurtful or something spiteful or

something that isn’t helpful or

it’s the middle of the night and someone

calls me up and i say you know what did

you even go to medical school

i’m really sorry um i’m really sorry i

shouldn’t have said that how

how can i help you okay you change

yourself

and eventually if you change yourself

enough people will notice

they’ll notice that you’re changing and

so people will go why is it that people

prefer to work with

that person than that person or they

really like it when that person is on

call and not that person

and so what they do is they role model

off you and that’s not a hierarchical

thing

people role model in all directions so

suddenly you change yourself

and so the people you work with change

so you start to change your team

suddenly

maybe your boss or maybe your junior or

maybe your colleague goes i saw simon

after a really stressful case go

do you know what guys i’m really sorry i

raised my voice during that case but

thank you very much

i think i think i might do that because

people seem to respond really well to

that so so you start to change your team

and then you realize of course

why isn’t patience like going to that

operating theater or that clinic

why is it that the nursing staff always

try and swap and do this instead of that

and so you start to have a better team

and of course we’re all competitive so

when people go well that team

that team’s better than this team i want

to be that team

how do i make my team like their team

and so suddenly you start to change

your unit and if you change your unit

eventually people go why is that you’re

doing better than that unit

and so eventually you change your

hospital and as we’ve seen from other

speakers today

certain units certain hospitals get held

up look at what they’ve done look at

what they’ve achieved and if you can

change a hospital then you can start to

change

the health service the whole health

service

not just hospital not just gp practice

not just

primary care or secondary care or

paramedics or everyone and then

because we’re doctors and nurses and

health care givers we start to also

change the way we interact with our

patients so actually we literally

start to change the world

and it all started because i asked you

to

change yourself and i actually believe

that by doing that we can completely

change the culture we work in

and the place where we make people

better

will get better you

我一直讨厌恶霸,

因为我是

学校里那个永远

不适应的胖犹太孩子,然后成为一名

意识到我可以对

这些行为做点什么的实习生,

我一直讨厌恶霸,所以

当我得到的时候我很幸运 成为一个组织的一部分,

这意味着我们现在可以为此做点什么

实际上这个组织是一个

实习组织,

当我只是副总裁时,是我之前的呃

团队认为我们应该进行

人口普查

我们想问实习生他们是如何 觉得

事情

有点像工会类型的事情,

所以我们问了他们所有的问题,

你住在哪里,你在哪里工作

,我真正想看看的事情之一是

欺凌破坏和骚扰等行为,

现在我们是 不是愚蠢,所以我们

得到这个数据的原因是因为我们说看,

我们也会有一个价格平局,

如果你赢了,我们会给你两个大奖,所以我们实际上从中得到了

相当多的数据,

现在我知道我是什么了 想法会发生

我们实际上已经对这些

学员说过我们会让你成为第一承诺

我们会保持匿名这样没有

人可以去你说

这个第二我们保证无论

我们找到什么我们都会做

如果它说我们在浪费时间

找错了树,我们就去酒吧说看起来不错,这

不是问题,

但如果我们发现一些

有意义的事情,我们可以做一些

事情我们会 这样做

,这些数据回来了,这让我

大吃一惊,

但是人们使用诸如欺凌和

骚扰破坏之类的

词,它们是非常情绪化的词,它们的含义非常

不同,

所以呃,它们需要被定义,

欺凌是某人使用

权力制造的地方 你感到害怕 或者

害怕,做一些你

不想做的事,

好吧,我是你的老板,你

今天不会吃午饭,

好吧破坏更具颠覆性

骚扰是那些受保护的

特征,我们谈论年龄

性别性等等,我们问了

两个非常有力的问题,我们询问

人们是否在人口普查前一个月经历过

这些

事情,

以及他们是否曾经察觉到它们

人们说的其他重大挑战之一

是良好的感知

这一切都在旁观者的眼中,

但我真的认为这

是更强大的事情之一,因为

实际上,这是

我们谈论时总是出现的事情之一 这些

行为是呃,

如果我和你聊天,你是我的

实习生

,我们相处得很好,我

只是告诉你,加油,加油

,我们笑了,这很好,

每个人都笑了,除了

房间后面的一位医科学生

,剧院里的一位护士去我不敢相信他

对那个人说话

我不能我不敢相信他让他有

这种感觉

等等 实际上,感知非常

强大,我们有一些数据表明

这些行为存在问题,但不要

误会我的意思,这

不是实习生问题,还有很多其他

调查,如果我想放很多,我可以

图表显示

每个人都经历过,因为这

不是实习生问题,这是一个文化

问题

,所以要解决它,我们需要改变

文化

现在这是我认为

培训

应该像家人一样的事情,所以你的妈妈和

爸爸

爱你我 希望

,这意味着有时

他们会奖励你,

你做得很好,对你有好处,

这是一份礼物

,有时他们告诉你去你的

房间,你

妈妈,但第二天你知道

他们仍然爱你,他们知道什么 曾是

对你最好,这就是

你希望与父母建立的那种关系,

但几年

前有人转身对父母

说,嗯,

不要打

你的孩子,如果你不打你的孩子

打你的孩子那是

虐待你是虐待儿童者

是的,打你的孩子是不好的养育方式

,所以发生的事情父母

说得很好

我的父母打了我,他们的父母也

打了

他们这使我成为一个坏父母和我的

父母

事实上,在本新闻稿之前,所有父母都是

坏父母

,我们说的是不,根本不是那样的,

因为如果你把它当作一个责备的

事情,

如果你把它变成他们和我们的事情,那就是

实习生和培训师的事情,或者 一个医生

和一个护士的事情,

然后它立即变成了一个责备的事情

,所以人们当然

会个人认为

你是一个糟糕的父母你是一个糟糕的教练

你是一个糟糕的护士或一个

坏人我们是什么 说实际上是不,

我们只知道这 ngs 已经改变,

这是一种范式转变,我们

知道有

更好的做事方式,有

更好的培训方式,而不是让某人

感觉自己渺小并重新建立他们,

有更好的教育方式,而

不是

把知识灌输给他们,

因为 实际上,这确实有效

,只有更好的方法可以做到这

一点,这意味着每个人都

对此感觉更好,

但是如果您考虑其他

改变文化的运动,如果您考虑

吸烟或安全带,

这将需要一代人的时间,

因为这并不容易,因为 你

知道你必须反映什么

为了在工作中做得更好,

但你知道我会和你分享一些东西

我仍然会这样做有时有时我

更频繁地投入其中,

但事实是

,很难 最好的一点是承认

你必须改变

,也许即使是最好的

和最坏的你

也可以做得更好一点可以改变,但大的

改变几乎是不可能的 每个人都戒烟

问题解决了它永远不会

发生所以你必须做什么 做的

是微小的变化 构造

变化 这里没有人会知道

你脚下的构造板块在

移动,但它们确实在移动

,你有这种缓慢的运动,而你却

没有意识到世界

正在你脚下发生变化,所以这就是你

需要做的,并且 最好的方法

是从你自己开始,所以你说我

在照镜子,下次我

在工作中说一些愚蠢的事情,

或者伤害你的事情,或者恶意的

事情,或者没有帮助的事情,

或者是半夜和某人

打电话给我,我说你知道

你甚至去医学院

我真的很抱歉,我真的很抱歉我

不应该说我

怎么能帮助你好吧,你改变

自己

,最终如果你改变你

足够多的人会注意到

他们会注意到你正在改变,

所以人们会离开为什么人们

更喜欢与那个人一起工作而

不是那个人,或者

当那个人随叫随到而不是那个人时他们真的很喜欢它

等等 他们所做的是他们以你为

榜样,这不是一个等级森严的

事情

人们在各个方面都以榜样所以

突然你改变了你自己

和你一起工作的人改变

了你开始改变你的团队

突然

可能是你的老板或你的下级或

也许你的同事

在一个非常有压力的案子之后去见了西蒙去

你知道什么人我真的很抱歉我

在那起案件中提高了我的声音但

非常感谢

我想我想我可能会这样做因为

人们似乎反应很好

所以你开始改变你的团队

然后你当然意识到

为什么不像去那个

手术室或那个诊所那样有耐心

为什么护理人员总是

试图交换并这样做而不是t 帽子

,所以你开始有一个更好的团队

,当然我们都有竞争力,所以

当人们进展顺利时,

那个团队比这个团队更好我

想成为那个团队

我如何让我的团队像他们的

团队一样突然间你 开始改变

你的单位,如果你最终改变你的单位,

人们会离开,为什么你

比那个单位做得更好

,所以最终你改变了你的

医院,正如我们今天从其他演讲者看到的那样,

某些单位某些医院被阻止

了 看看他们做了

什么 每个人,然后

因为我们是医生、护士和

医疗保健提供者,我们也开始

改变我们与患者互动的方式,

所以实际上我们

开始改变世界

,这一切都开始了,因为我让

你 吊死自己,我实际上相信

,通过这样做,我们可以彻底

改变我们工作的

文化,我们让人们变得更好的地方

会变得更好