3 Keys to Virtual Connection
[Music]
you may think
virtual events are boring draining and a
poor substitute for the real thing
and unfortunately for many of today’s
events you’d be right
what we often refer to as zoom fatigue
is actually just an excuse for poorly
designed and facilitated zoom
gatherings that make audiences want to
check out and drop off
but it doesn’t have to be that way what
if people left your virtual event
feeling
energized nourished and part of a
community
to take it one step further what if
connecting online
could be just as good and in some ways
even better
than connecting in person for the last
20 years i’ve led interactive in-person
events for tens of thousands of people
around the world
and trained people how to lead those
kind of events
then when covent 19 hit my entire
business model crumbled
and i was forced to question my own
assumptions
after a few weeks of mourning i decided
it would be far more exciting to prove
myself wrong than to wait around for in
person to be possible again
so i shifted my mindset and i started
asking
how can we take these two-dimensional
technological platforms designed for
information dissemination
and leverage them as powerful vehicles
for authentic
human connection i can tell you from
experience now
leading virtual trainings and scaling
intimacy with thousands of people that
it is totally
possible as long as you’re willing to do
one thing prioritize connection
over content yes i am asking you to
scale back on content
just a little bit if your participants
are coming
only for content they can watch the
recording later
at one and a half times the speed if you
want people to show up
live then one of the best incentives you
can offer them
is the opportunity to connect to other
participants
at in-person events these connections
often happen by serendipity like waiting
in line for the restroom or the lunch
line
or who you sit next to at the keynote
but online
we have to create opportunities for
connection on purpose
or else we risk that it will not happen
at all
and while we know that engaging our
audience is
critical connection is actually your
most effective
engagement strategy because then we’re
accountable to someone else
and we’re much less likely to be
multitasking
so here are three connection strategies
that you can use to shift your audience
from being passive observers to being
active participants
and to create a culture of belonging in
your virtual events
our first strategy is to connect early
because the beginning sets the tone for
everything to come you never have a
second chance to make a first impression
so you want to make sure that connection
is a priority
right away imagine arriving at a virtual
session
there is silence a static slide with a
countdown clock and the chat has been
disabled
what impression would this give you it
would probably feel
impersonal informational and unengaging
now imagine arriving to a virtual
session to a gallery view
and a sea of friendly faces including
the facilitator
each person is being greeted by name
there’s upbeat instrumental music
playing in the background
and an opening prompt to answer in the
chat like what’s a quote that
inspires you or what has been the
highlight of your week
the facilitator launches a poll to find
out what everyone is hoping to get out
of the session
they invite you to change your screen
name to something personal like a
nickname
a place in nature that relaxes you or
your favorite movie
all of these small things add up to one
big thing
a feeling of being welcomed and
acknowledged as individuals
and as a community and that connection
matters
our second strategy is to connect often
so maybe you did connect early with an
opening prompt or an icebreaker so you
think you can check it off your list
but as we know relationships and
community take time to build
so it’s important that connection is a
thread that’s woven throughout your
event with a number of touch points
these touch points don’t have to be long
but you do want them to happen
often ideal times for connection
are in the beginning as we’ve discussed
after a break or a meal
right before you close and any time you
feel the energy beginning to dip
now oftentimes we get stuck in a false
dichotomy thinking we have to choose
between connection
and content but you can absolutely have
both
my favorite way to do this is with a
debrief after a
presentation a panel or a speaker and in
the debrief you are combining connection
and content
by posing a question for participants to
discuss that helps them integrate
and reflect on what they just learned or
experienced
our third strategy is to gradually
increase vulnerability
we want people to open not close
so we have to ease them into a state of
vulnerability
rather than asking them about the most
embarrassing moment of their lives in
the first five minutes
of our session so some of you may be
familiar with the famous article the 36
questions that will make you fall in
love with anyone
it was actually based on a research
study about platonic relationships
the main thing the researchers found
about establishing
a relationship among peers is that it
has to be
sustained escalating reciprocal
personal self-disclosure so let’s break
that down
sustained connecting often
escalating gradually increasing
reciprocal everyone is doing it it’s not
one-sided
and it’s personal self-disclosure so
you’re revealing something about
your humanity beyond your title your
role or your status
my favorite activity for practicing
gradually increased vulnerability
is a classic one called if you really
knew me you’d know
and in this activity you get people
together in pairs or trios and have them
finish that sentence stem multiple times
if i were to answer that sentence stem
right now it would be something like
if you really knew me you’d know that
i’m eight months pregnant
and a first-time mom to be if you really
knew me
you’d know being pregnant in a pandemic
has been pretty
isolating and sometimes really sad
if you really knew me you know that it’s
been
an arduous five-year fertility journey
to even get here
and that it took me a while to trust
that it was really happening this time
so notice your feelings of connection to
me
right now what are the emotions the
thoughts
the associations or the memories that
come up for you
and imagine now that it’s your turn what
would you be
inspired to share
so that feeling of connection that
you’re maybe having right now
is just the tip of the iceberg of what’s
possible
with virtual events if you apply
the three strategies connect early
connect
often and gradually increase
vulnerability you will be
well on your way to leading
life-changing events
in any medium as participants
it’s time that we demand that these sit
and listen paradigms change
so that prioritizing human connection
becomes the new norm
as the world goes virtual it’s what we
need now
more than ever