A Pen and Paper creating Bonds
one evening
me and my dad were scrolling through the
tedx app to find a talk we could watch
together
as we look through the variety of talks
i noticed quite a number on parenting
how to raise successful kids what would
you tell your daughters about 2016
there was nothing about children a
child’s perspective on this
a child’s perspective on not getting the
right parenting
this caught my attention as a few weeks
ago i attended a swimming class
a group swimming class during the
swimming class
while we waited for our coach one of the
children brought up the topic on why the
others do swimming
seven out of the ten children had the
exact same answer
my parents forced me to they said their
parents forced them to do swimming
and they don’t like doing swimming so
they might have a chance to get a sports
scholarship
but why didn’t they tell the children
why don’t the children tell their
parents that they didn’t like doing
swimming
it’s not right that the children can’t
talk to their parents
it’s not what my 2020 vision had in mind
i am ashita curator someone who does
swimming for pure enjoyment
and today i’m going to talk to you about
children not being able to talk to their
parents
86 of children hide their emotions from
their parents
this is a huge problem if you don’t talk
to your parents about your feelings
it’s most likely you won’t talk to
anyone else which will
lead you to bottling up your emotions
inside of you which can lead to many
mental health issues
i want to asked our secondary counselor
if anyone had come up to her
on how to express feelings
she said no one had approached her on
how to express their feelings
but she had met many people who had
other problems
that come from not expressing their
feelings
also 74 of children
follow in their parents sports career
paths
here’s what one of them had to say if i
tell my parents that i don’t like doing
tennis
i’ll be seen as the disappointment in
the family and i don’t want that
i just want them to be happy and proud
if you don’t like doing something you’re
less likely to do it accurately
and there should be someone who likes
doing it and will do it better than they
will this make your parents happy though
these children need
confidence but how
however honestly speaking it isn’t the
child’s fault
they aren’t receiving the right
parenting you as a parent what kind of
parent are you
are you the helicopter parent who pays
very close attention to their child and
very is very overprotective
or are you the tiger parent who’s very
strict and demanding and pressures their
child
to attain high academic grades or a high
status and extracurricular activities
many would argue that these are the keys
to parenting but coming from
coming from a child’s perspective it
really isn’t
we don’t want our parents all up in our
business but we want them involved in
our lives as well
can we mix the two to create a new brand
of parent
the bedroom parent let’s call it a
parent who knows what’s going on inside
in their child’s lives
but keeps their distance when needed a
parent who their child is comfortable
being around
and can express their emotions to sort
of like a child’s bedroom
a place where they’re comfortable and
left to their own thoughts
however parents are less likely to
change and these children can’t stay
hidden forever
but how can they grow the confidence to
go talk to them
a while ago i read a post online that
states children find confidence through
writing
this reminded me of the swimming class
what if the children write to their
parents
every week month or so they could spill
all their feelings to their parents
through a letter
this would be easier than talking to
those to their parents
because they don’t have those deathly
stares glaring down at them
or the fear of what’s going to happen
next each month will get better because
the parents will try to evict all the
bad things that happen in the light
this way the children can stay happy
mentally healthy
and be able to talk to them but us
children can’t do everything
i can’t believe you thought i was going
to leave it all up to us
parents are responsible for their
child’s mental health and well-being
they aren’t going to let us do
everything are they
i would hope they would as soon as they
read and receive the
letter they should go talk to their
child talk to them about why they felt a
certain way
and why they put certain things down on
their letter don’t rant at them or blow
up with them
if you rant at them they’re most likely
to zone out midzone
keeping it short and simple is the way
to go if you disagree with something
they put on the letter
try to come up with a solution you both
agree to
my turn to 20 vision is no more children
should have chokes in their throats
or fences too high to get over these
fences can be broken down by writing
children expressing their feelings
through writing just give them a pen
and a lying piece of paper by the end of
12 months your child should be able to
freely talk to you
because of the bonding relationship
you’ve created with them
if they can’t you’re doing something
wrong
i want children to feel more comfortable
expressing their emotions thank you
you