Living your dreams and fears
[Music]
i heard this quote somewhere
and it struck a chord with me self-doubt
kills more dreams than failure ever will
hello everyone my name is sara shah
i’m a first time tedx speaker actually
this is the first time i’m ever speaking
about my ideas and life
on such a large platform i am here
to share my experiences about my journey
from bangalore to turtug ladakh
is the northernmost village of india
situated in the ladakh region 205
kilometers from
lay and the closest village to the
indo-park border
2.5 kilometers to be precise from there
is my home where i run a little primary
school for the children of that region
so much to share so much to talk about
how did i reach
the highest point not just on the map of
india
but also my life sounds divine
but it was a tough ride
i was born and brought up in bangalore
where
i completed my schooling and attained a
degree in interior design
i worked as a freelance designer and mc
and in the corporate sector for over two
years
i liked my work it paid well
but there was something always niggling
at me
some dissatisfaction some discomfort
does it sound familiar
was i happy i’m not sure
maybe not i was too young
to understand this emptiness within me
according to the norms of the society i
was
just beginning my life and doing well at
it
in short i did not have reason to
complain
or feel this way then why this feeling
i just couldn’t fathom or understand
this disconnect if everything was good
then why did i feel this way i was
earning well
i was doing everything right then why
so many questions no answers
every time i spoke to someone i came
across a blank wall
no answers i had this need
this craving to find
that missing element i decided
to take a break move out for a bit
and explore myself
there was this desire to reach out and
work with children
which was stronger than ever before now
i wanted to go away for a bit everyone
around me said
a girl shouldn’t travel and live alone a
few said
this is just a waste of time and many
more said
what can one person’s teachings do
they laughed and they mocked but
my parents said if this is what you want
to do
if this is what makes you happy then do
it
i just went for it and
just an idea back then later shaped my
life
the minute i felt that this
change was doable and had to be done
everything just started feeling easy
i felt a weight being lift off my
shoulders
i first started as a volunteer
at a wonderful school in the mountains
of doda
which changed everything for me
i absolutely enjoyed and loved being
around kids
teaching them the very little i knew and
learning so much more from them
i learnt how to live a life
with just the basic necessities and it
just seemed so wonderful
i absolutely knew that this
is something that i’d want to do for the
rest of my life i wanted to be around
kids i wanted to
teach i had now discovered my inner
passion
with this passion of mine
i then moved to ladakh to volunteer at a
winter tuition program
in turtok by then i would already
receive messages from friends and family
asking me to return
back to the city and get a real job
but i had already found my real job
i was finally at peace i was happy
and every day seemed so satisfying
what more could one want
and the minute i reached turtok
in ladakh it was a little frozen village
with kids running all around me
a few with the rolling wheels and a few
sliding down the frozen stream
they all looked at me with curious eyes
and wondering who this new stranger was
back then in 2016 there was no internet
and barely one bar of network at certain
points
but honestly it did not matter i just
enjoyed being there the kids
would hurdle around me every evening
they wanted to know it all from galaxies
to planets
to mountains to planes to countries to
people to world history to modern art
they just had endless questions they
would sit around me until late evening
not wanting to go home winter turned to
spring
and spring into summer it was now
time to leave the village which meant
leaving a family
it was that with a very heavy heart
i decided to leave but with
a promise to return
there was no looking back now i knew
what i wanted to do and there was no way
that i wanted to get back to the city
for
good that was a very big decision
which meant compromising on my financial
security
but what would financial security mean
without
true happiness i would constantly
question myself
and continued i trusted myself enough
to sustain through this journey and i’m
glad
i did it definitely wasn’t easy
there were many challenges from the
harsh weather conditions
to connectivity to lack of basic
resources
cultural differences language barrier
and many more
but the light at the end of the tunnel
kept me going i just
knew where i wanted to reach and there’s
a saying
when you absolutely love what you do
everything seems so easy and that’s
exactly what happened for me
things started falling in place and i
started celebrating
every little achievement of mine
and then a year later
i returned to the village and with the
support
of a then tourist and now a very close
friend
we set up turtuk valley school
a little primary school just
at the border for the region for the
children of that region
it entirely runs on a volunteering
program
and through donations from kind
strangers
and friends which are raised through
social media
social media definitely has been a
blessing
and this school is definitely a very big
achievement for me
every time i wake up and a day looks
gloomy
just this achievement brightens up
everything for me
remember everyone around you
will always tell you what they think you
should do
but always believe in the gut feeling of
yours
you know what your heart beats for go
for it
believe in yourself and work endlessly
towards your dreams
because today i know that this dream was
planted in my heart
for a reason and i’m forever grateful
to my parents for letting me take this
plunge
and not pushing me into the rat race
thank you