Breaking Down Apathy
later today you have lunch planned with
a friend
and your homework is already done do you
get out of bed
okay now imagine this last night you got
home super late
you had gotten into another argument
with your parent your friend
your work your boss you had said
something that hurt them
and you haven’t eaten since yesterday’s
breakfast
sleep your mind playing past mistakes on
loop
only to wake up with your alarm
screeching in your ear
you realize you only have 10 minutes
left before you have to leave and you’re
almost certainly going to be late
do you get up okay what
do you really have will staying in bed
make anything better
your class is still going to start your
workplace is still going to open
and the world is going to keep on
turning by choosing to stay in bed and
ignore it all you just take yourself out
of the picture
like most teenagers getting out of bed
is just the first challenge i face in a
day
then i’m off to school homework studying
i go to work
i have chores there’s friends to see and
i like to write or play the piano
after all teenagers are expected to have
a social life and extracurriculars
there’s pressure to perform well in
school to get into a good college
to get a steady job and have a stable
life
teenagers have to make big decisions
with only part of the information
and sometimes it can feel like every
decision we make can make or break the
rest of our lives
we have to find a balance between
expectations the future we want and the
lives we are currently leading
in my experience this workload is
overwhelming school has always been
a big priority for me giving 110 in
every class
but in the end school isn’t everything
and as i near adulthood i’m realizing
that this work ethic has made me
lose chances to discover and pursue my
interests
so now i do try to learn new things i’m
relearning the piano and learning how to
juggle and as i’m a very social person
i like to share the things i learn the
things i do and my opinions
sometimes people will scoff feeling the
need to weigh in with their judgment on
how i spend my time
the consequences of all of this has left
me anxious
and a perfectionist who sometimes feels
lost when she’s looking towards the
future
and i’m not the only one so many
teenagers feel the immense pressure to
perform while in school or fail
so many teenagers feel the judgment that
comes along with being a teenager
being inexperienced and a bit awkward
nobody wants to be
a disappointment but after failing to
meet expectations
over and over again sometimes we can
start to believe it
and stop caring the merriam-webster
defines apathy as one
a lack of a feeling or two a lack of
interest or concern
lots of teens turn to apathy as a
defense against the world if we don’t
care about something it can’t hurt us
how do we justify doing poorly in school
we don’t really care about our grades
the forests are on fire and there’s
nothing we can do about it
doesn’t matter to us did i say something
that hurt somebody i care about
it’s like i don’t care about anybody the
problem is
apathy takes so much more than it gives
it leaves you feeling empty
life becomes gray and there’s no point
in anything
no point taking care of ourselves no
point in helping others
the good news is apathy isn’t a natural
thing for people
to become emotionally numb we have to
lie to ourselves
we have to shove down our feelings and
pretend they aren’t there
so why do we do it and how do we escape
apathy those are the questions
because every person is different and
the causes of our apathy are too
so healing there’s no one good way to
heal
one of my friends experiences apathy as
a side effect of seasonal depression
when she’s overcome with this emptiness
she plays the guitar and sings
she goes to therapy to learn how to cope
and remain a functioning member
of society so when she feels up to it
she can go out with her friends and have
real fun
and she can almost enjoy doing her
homework
someone else i know used to insist the
world could burn for all they care
for years people told them they had to
do something they just weren’t
and so they shut down their grades were
dropping and their relationships with
others was deteriorating
and while things can still be rocky
they’re trying now
but they had to choose to ignore the
expectations
and just be themselves
for me apathy persists sometimes i wake
up
wishing i could just disappear and other
times i wake up
staring at my ceiling and trying and
failing to get up
there’s also of course the times when i
can spring right out of bed
when i am overcome with apathy
i try not to bully myself too much and
just let it happen
so when i do get up i can find the
people and things that remind me that
life is worth living
so healing is different for everybody
and
like i said before there is no one good
way to do it
but i have found that there are three
important shifts in internal dialogue we
can all make
that can make it a little bit easier
first
saying i am not trapped whenever we feel
stuck
or like our current situation is going
to go on forever
remember that life can change at any
moment and that while we can’t control
the external world
we do have control over the internal we
choose how we see the world and how we
react
second saying i am enough because it’s
true
even when you fail even when you don’t
meet other people’s expectations
you are enough third and finally
saying my life matters
when you feel too small or too
insignificant and you forget
the things you do and the things you say
impact other people
please remember that every day you
change the world just by being who you
are
so teenagers can make a difference we
can change the world
and maybe not the whole world right away
but certainly our corner of it
apathy will not protect us forever like
a straw hut it will fall down at the
slightest breeze of trouble
and then it just becomes an obstacle in
the way of becoming who we
want to be in the beginning
i gave you those scenarios and whether
the circumstances were ideal or terrible
it was still you choosing to get out of
bed
no matter what is happening no matter
what anybody says to you they can’t
change
they can’t change who you are and they
can’t make you stay in bed
thank you