The little risks you can take to increase your luck Tina Seelig

I’ve spent nearly two decades

observing what makes people
luckier than others

and trying to help people
increase their luck.

You see, I teach entrepreneurship,

and we all know
that most new ventures fail,

and innovators and entrepreneurs
need all the luck they can get.

So what is luck?

Luck is defined as success or failure
apparently caused by chance.

Apparently.

That’s the operative word.

It looks like it’s chance

because we rarely see all the levers
that come into play to make people lucky.

But I’ve realized, by watching so long,

that luck is rarely a lightning strike,

isolated and dramatic.

It’s much more like the wind,

blowing constantly.

Sometimes it’s calm,

and sometimes it blows in gusts,

and sometimes it comes from directions
that you didn’t even imagine.

So how do you catch the winds of luck?

It’s easy, but it’s not obvious.

So I’m going to share
three things with you

that you can do to build a sail
to capture the winds of luck.

The first thing you want to do

is to change your relationship
with yourself.

Be willing to take small risks
that get you out of your comfort zone.

Now, when we’re children,
we do this all the time.

We have to do this if we’re going
to learn how to walk or talk

or ride a bike

or even quantum mechanics. Right?

We need to go from someone one week
who doesn’t ride a bike

to, next week, someone who does.

And this requires us to get
out of our comfort zone

and take some risks.

The problem is, as we get older,

we rarely do this.

We sort of lock down
the sense of who we are

and don’t stretch anymore.

Now, with my students,

I spend a lot of time
giving them encouragement

to get out of their comfort zone
and take some risks.

How do I do this?

Well, I start out by having them
fill out a risk-o-meter.

Now, it’s basically a fun thing
we developed in our class

where they map out what risks
they’re willing to take.

And it becomes clear very quickly to them

that risk-taking is not binary.

There are intellectual risks
and physical risks and financial risks

and emotional risks and social risks
and ethical risks and political risks.

And once they do this, they compare
their risk profiles with others,

and they quickly realize
that they’re all really different.

I then encourage them to stretch,

to take some risks that get them
out of their comfort zone.

For example, I might ask them
to do an intellectual risk

and try to tackle a problem
they haven’t tried before;

or a social risk, talking to someone
sitting next to them on the train;

or an emotional risk,

maybe telling someone
they really care about how they feel.

I do this myself all the time.

About a dozen years ago,
I was on an airplane,

early, early morning flight
on my way to Ecuador.

And normally, I would just
put on my headphones

and go to sleep, wake up, do some work,

but I decided to take a little risk,

and I started a conversation
with the man sitting next to me.

I introduced myself,
and I learned that he was a publisher.

Interesting.

We ended up having
a fascinating conversation.

I learned all about the future
of the publishing industry.

So about three quarters
of the way through the flight,

I decided to take another risk,

and I opened up my laptop
and I shared with him a book proposal

I put together for something
I was doing in my class.

And he was very polite, he read it,

and he said, “You know what, Tina,
this isn’t right for us,

but thank you so much for sharing.”

It’s OK. That risk didn’t work out.

I shut my laptop.

At the end of the flight,
we exchanged contact information.

A couple of months later,
I reached out to him,

and I said, “Mark, would you
like to come to my class?

I’m doing a project
on reinventing the book,

the future of publishing.”

And he said, “Great. I’d love to come.”

So he came to my class.
We had a great experience.

A few months later, I wrote to him again.

This time, I sent him
a bunch of video clips

from another project my students had done.

He was so intrigued

by one of the projects
the students had done,

he thought there might be a book in it,

and he wanted to meet those students.

I have to tell you,
I was a little bit hurt.

(Laughter)

I mean, he wanted to do a book
with my students and not with me,

but OK, it’s all right.

So I invited him to come down,
and he and his colleagues came to Stanford

and met with the students,
and afterwards, we had lunch together.

And one of his editors said to me,

“Hey, have you ever
considered writing a book?”

I said, “Funny you should ask.”

And I pulled out the exact same proposal

that I had showed his boss a year earlier.

Within two weeks, I had a contract,

and within two years, the book had sold
over a million copies around the world.

(Applause)

Now, you might say,

“Oh, you’re so lucky.”

But of course I was lucky,

but that luck resulted
from a series of small risks I took,

starting with saying hello.

And anyone can do this,

no matter where you are in your life,

no matter where you are in the world –

even if you think
you’re the most unlucky person,

you can do this by taking little risks
that get you out of your comfort zone.

You start building a sail to capture luck.

The second thing you want to do

is to change your relationship
with other people.

You need to understand that everyone
who helps you on your journey

is playing a huge role
in getting you to your goals.

And if you don’t show appreciation,

not only are you not closing the loop,

but you’re missing an opportunity.

When someone does something for you,

they’re taking that time

that they could be spending
on themselves or someone else,

and you need to acknowledge
what they’re doing.

Now, I run three fellowship
programs at Stanford,

and they are very competitive to get into,

and when I send out the letters
to those students who don’t get in,

I always know there are going to be
people who are disappointed.

Some of the people who are disappointed
send me notes, complaining.

Some of them send notes

saying what could I do to make myself
more successful next time around?

And every once in a while,

someone sends me a note
thanking me for the opportunity.

This happened about seven years ago.

A young man named Brian
sent me a beautiful note saying,

“I know I’ve been rejected
from this program twice,

but I want to thank you
for the opportunity.

I learned so much
through the process of applying.”

I was so taken by
the graciousness of his message

that I invited him to come and meet me.

And we spent some time chatting
and cooked up an idea

for an independent study project together.

He was on the football team at Stanford,

and he decided to do a project
on looking at leadership in that context.

We got to know each other
incredibly well through that quarter,

and he took the project
that he started working on

in the independent study

and turned it, ultimately,
into a company called Play for Tomorrow,

where he teaches kids
from disadvantaged backgrounds

how to, essentially,
craft the lives they dream to live.

Now, the important thing about this story

is that we both ended up catching
the winds of luck

as a result of his thank-you note.

But it was the winds
that we didn’t expect in the first place.

Over the course
of the last couple of years,

I’ve come up with
some tactics for my own life

to help me really foster appreciation.

My favorite is that at the end
of every single day,

I look at my calendar
and I review all the people I met with,

and I send thank-you notes
to every single person.

It only takes a few minutes,

but at the end of every day,

I feel incredibly grateful
and appreciative,

and I promise you
it has increased my luck.

So first, you need to take some risks
and get out of your comfort zone.

Second, you need to show appreciation.

And third, you want to change
your relationship with ideas.

Most people look at new ideas
that come there way and they judge them.

“That’s a great idea”
or “That’s a terrible idea.”

But it’s actually much more nuanced.

Ideas are neither good or bad.

And in fact, the seeds of terrible ideas
are often something truly remarkable.

One of my favorite exercises
in my classes on creativity

is to help students foster an attitude
of looking at terrible ideas

through the lens of possibilities.

So I give them a challenge:

to create an idea
for a brand new restaurant.

They have to come up
with the best ideas for a new restaurant

and the worst ideas for a new restaurant.

So the best ideas are things like
a restaurant on a mountaintop

with a beautiful sunset,

or a restaurant on a boat
with a gorgeous view.

And the terrible ideas are things like
a restaurant in a garbage dump,

or a restaurant with terrible service
that’s really dirty,

or a restaurant that serves
cockroach sushi.

(Laughter)

So they hand all the ideas to me,

I read the great ideas out loud,

and then I rip them up
and throw them away.

I then take the horrible ideas
and redistribute them.

Each team now has an idea
that another team thought was horrible,

and their challenge is to turn it
into something brilliant.

Here’s what happens.

Within about 10 seconds, someone says,
“This is a fabulous idea.”

And they have about three minutes
before they pitch the idea to the class.

So the restaurant in the garbage dump?
What does that turn into?

Well, they collect all the extra food
from Michelin star restaurants

that was going to get thrown out,

and they have another restaurant
at a much lower price,

with all the leftovers.

Pretty cool?

Or the restaurant that’s dirty
with terrible service?

Well, that turns into a restaurant
that’s a training ground

for future restauranteurs to figure out
how to avoid all the pitfalls.

And the restaurant with cockroach sushi?

It turns into a sushi bar

with all sorts of really interesting
and exotic ingredients.

If you look around at the companies,

the ventures that are
really innovative around you,

the ones that we now take for granted
that have changed our life,

well, you know what?

They all started out as crazy ideas.

They started ideas
that when they pitched to other people,

most people said, “That’s crazy,
it will never work.”

So, yes, sometimes people
were born into terrible circumstances,

and sometimes, luck is a lightning bolt

that hits us with something wonderful
or something terrible.

But the winds of luck are always there,

and if you’re willing to take some risks,

if you’re willing to really go out
and show appreciation

and willing to really look at ideas,
even if they’re crazy,

through the lens of possibilities,

you can build a bigger and bigger sail
to catch the winds of luck.

Thank you.

(Applause)

我花了将近 20 年的时间

观察是什么让人们
比其他人更幸运,

并试图帮助人们
增加运气。

你看,我教企业家精神

,我们都
知道大多数新企业都会失败

,创新者和企业家
需要他们能得到的所有运气。

那么什么是运气?

运气被定义为
显然是偶然造成的成功或失败。

显然。

那是有效的词。

看起来这是一个机会,

因为我们很少看到所有
让人们走运的杠杆。

但我已经意识到,通过这么长时间的观察

,运气很少是闪电般的,

孤立的和戏剧性的。

它更像是风,

不停地吹。

时而风平浪静

,时而狂风骤雨

,时而来自
你想不到的方向。

那么如何抓住幸运之风呢?

这很容易,但并不明显。

因此,我将
与您分享三件事情

,您可以做这些事情来建造帆
来捕捉幸运之风。

你要做的第一件事

就是改变你
与自己的关系。

愿意承担
让你走出舒适区的小风险。

现在,当我们还是孩子的时候,我们总是
这样做。

如果我们
要学习如何走路、说话

或骑自行车

,甚至是量子力学,我们就必须这样做。 对?

我们需要从
一周不骑自行车的人

变成下周骑自行车的人。

这要求
我们走出舒适区

并承担一些风险。

问题是,随着年龄的增长,

我们很少这样做。

我们有点锁定
我们是谁的感觉

,不再伸展。

现在,和我的学生一起,

我花了很多时间

鼓励他们走出舒适区
并承担一些风险。

我该怎么做呢?

好吧,我首先让他们
填写风险表。

现在,这基本上是
我们在课堂上开发的一件有趣的事情

,他们可以确定
他们愿意承担的风险。

他们很快就会

明白,冒险不是二元的。

有智力风险
、身体风险、财务风险

、情感风险、社会风险
、道德风险和政治风险。

一旦他们这样做了,他们就会将
自己的风险状况与其他人进行比较

,他们很快就会
意识到他们都非常不同。

然后我鼓励他们伸展

,承担一些让
他们走出舒适区的风险。

例如,我可能会要求
他们承担智力风险

并尝试解决
他们以前从未尝试过的问题;

或社交风险,
在火车上与坐在他们旁边的人交谈;

或情绪风险,

也许告诉某人
他们真正关心他们的感受。

我自己一直这样做。

大约十几年前,
我在

去厄瓜多尔的路上乘坐飞机,一大早。

通常,我会
戴上

耳机睡觉,醒来,做一些工作,

但我决定冒一点风险

,我开始和
坐在我旁边的男人交谈。

我做了自我介绍
,得知他是个出版商。

有趣的。

我们最终进行了
一次有趣的对话。

我了解
了出版业的未来。

所以大约飞行了四分之三
的路程,

我决定再冒险一次

,我打开我的笔记本电脑
,与他分享了

我为
我在课堂上做的某件事而准备的书籍建议。

他很有礼貌,他读了一遍,

然后说,“你知道吗,蒂娜,
这不适合我们,

但非常感谢你的分享。”

没关系。 这种风险没有解决。

我关上了我的笔记本电脑。

在飞行结束时,
我们交换了联系信息。

几个月后,
我联系了他

,我说,“马克,你
愿意来我的课吗?

我正在做一个
关于重新发明这本书,

出版的未来的项目。”

他说:“太好了。我很想来。”

于是他来了我的班。
我们有很棒的经历。

几个月后,我再次给他写信。

这一次,我给他发
了一堆

我的学生完成的另一个项目的视频片段。

对学生们所做的一个项目非常感兴趣,

他认为里面可能有一本书

,他想见见那些学生。

我必须告诉你,
我有点受伤。

(笑声)

我的意思是,他想
和我的学生而不是和我一起写一本书,

但是好吧,没关系。

于是我邀请他下来
,他和他的同事们来到斯坦福,

和学生们见面,
然后我们一起吃午饭。

他的一位编辑对我说,

“嘿,你有没有
考虑过写一本书?”

我说,“有趣的是你应该问。”

我拿出了与

一年前向他老板展示的完全相同的提议。

两周之内,我签了一份合同,

两年之内,这本书在全球售出
超过一百万册。

(掌声)

现在,你可能会说,

“哦,你真幸运。”

当然,我很幸运,

但这种幸运
来自于我承担的一系列小风险,

从打招呼开始。

任何人都可以做到这一点,

无论你在生活中的

哪个地方,无论你在世界的哪个角落——

即使你认为
自己是最不幸的人,

你也可以通过冒
一些让你摆脱困境的风险来做到这一点 你的舒适区。

你开始建造风帆来捕捉运气。

你想做的第二件事

是改变你
与其他人的关系。

您需要了解,
在您的旅程中帮助您的每个人都在帮助

您实现目标方面发挥着重要作用。

如果你不表示赞赏,

你不仅没有关闭循环,

而且你错过了一个机会。

当有人为你做某事时,

他们会花时间

花在自己或其他人身上

,你需要承认
他们在做什么。

现在,我
在斯坦福大学开设了三个奖学金项目

,它们的进入竞争非常激烈

,当我把信
寄给那些没有进入的学生时,

我总是知道会
有人感到失望。

一些失望的人
给我寄信,抱怨。

他们中的一些人发送便条

说我可以做些什么来让自己
下次更成功?

每隔一段时间,就会

有人给我发
一封信,感谢我给了我这个机会。

这发生在大约七年前。

一个叫布赖恩的年轻人
给我发了一封漂亮的信,上面写着:

“我知道我已经
两次被这个项目拒绝了,

但我要感谢你
给我这个机会。


在申请的过程中学到了很多东西。”


被他慷慨的信息所吸引

,我邀请他来见我。

我们花了一些时间聊天
,共同提出

了一个独立研究项目的想法。

他当时在斯坦福大学的橄榄球队

,他决定做一个项目
来研究在这种情况下的领导力。

在那个季度,我们彼此非常了解

,他接受了

在独立研究中开始从事的项目

,并最终把它
变成了一家名为 Play for Tomorrow 的公司,

在那里他教
来自弱势背景的孩子

如何, 本质上,
打造他们梦想过的生活。

现在,关于这个故事的重要一点

是,由于他的感谢信,我们俩最终都抓住
了好运之风

但这
是我们一开始没想到的风。


过去的几年里,


为自己的生活想出了一些策略

来帮助我真正培养欣赏力。

我最喜欢的是,在
每一天结束时,

我都会查看我的日历
,回顾我遇到的所有人,

并向每一个人发送感谢信。

只需要几分钟,

但在每一天结束时,

我都感到非常感激
和感激

,我向你保证,
这增加了我的运气。

所以首先,你需要承担一些风险
,走出你的舒适区。

其次,你需要表达感激之情。

第三,你想改变
你与想法的关系。

大多数人都会看到新出现的
想法并对其进行评判。

“那是个好主意”
或“那是个糟糕的主意”。

但它实际上要微妙得多。

想法既不好也不坏。

事实上,可怕想法的种子
往往是真正非凡的东西。

在我的创造力课上,我最喜欢的一项练习

是帮助学生培养一种从可能性
的角度看待糟糕想法

的态度。

所以我给他们一个挑战:

为一家全新的餐厅创造一个想法。

他们必须
为新餐厅想出最好的主意,

为新餐厅想出最坏的主意。

所以最好的想法是
在山顶

上拥有美丽日落

的餐厅,或者在船上
拥有美丽景色的餐厅。

糟糕的想法是像
垃圾场里

的餐厅,或者服务很糟糕但
真的很脏

的餐厅,或者供应
蟑螂寿司的餐厅。

(笑声)

所以他们把所有的想法都交给我,

我大声朗读伟大的想法,

然后我
把它们撕掉扔掉。

然后,我接受这些可怕的想法
并重新分配它们。

每个团队现在都有一个想法
,另一个团队认为这很可怕

,他们的挑战是将其
变成精彩的东西。

这就是发生的事情。

大约 10 秒后,有人说:
“这是一个绝妙的主意。”

他们有大约三分钟的
时间向全班介绍这个想法。

那么垃圾场的餐厅呢?
那会变成什么?

好吧,他们从米其林星级餐厅收集所有多余的食物,这些食物

将被扔掉

,他们还有另一家
价格低得多的餐厅,

还有所有的剩菜。

很酷吗?

还是
服务糟糕的肮脏餐厅?

好吧,这变成了一家餐厅
,它是

未来餐厅老板的训练场,可以让他们找出
如何避免所有陷阱。

还有蟑螂寿司的餐厅?

它变成了一个寿司吧,里面

有各种非常有趣
和异国情调的食材。

如果你看看周围的公司,

那些
真正具有创新性的企业

,那些我们现在认为理所当然
改变了我们生活的企业,

那么,你知道吗?

他们都是从疯狂的想法开始的。

他们开始的
想法是,当他们向其他人推销时,

大多数人都会说,“这太疯狂了,
它永远不会奏效。”

所以,是的,有时
人们出生在可怕的环境中

,有时,运气就像一道闪电

,用一些美妙
或可怕的东西击中我们。

但是幸运之风总是在那里

,如果你愿意承担一些风险,

如果你愿意真正走出
去表达感激之情

,愿意通过镜头真正看待想法
,即使它们很疯狂

的可能性,

你可以建立一个越来越大的帆
来抓住运气之风。

谢谢你。

(掌声)