Fck being humble
[Music]
for years we’ve been taught that being
humble
is the key to individual success but
what if we lived in a world where we
were unapologetically proud of our
achievements
what if we didn’t shy away from
celebrating our wins or putting
ourselves forward for
opportunities instead of waiting for
them to come to us
what if we champion ourselves became
socially acceptable instead of looked
down upon
for being arrogant two years ago i set
out on a mission
to change the way the world views
self-promotion
because i believe that self-advocacy can
have the power to change your life but
only if you show people what you’re
capable of doing
instead of just telling them i’ll give
you an example
we all know the saying if you work hard
you will go far
this is the narrative we’re taught as
children through school
university and the workplace but
have you ever questioned why some people
work hard
and they don’t go far when i think about
this
and i’ve explored this topic for a long
time now
i think that there is actually a flaw in
that statement
i think that society has set us up to
fail
by only telling us one side of that
story
it has made us believe that when we
don’t do well when you don’t see the
results that we want to see
it’s down to us and it’s our fault
the side effects of this can be a
crippling sense of inadequacy
a lifetime of self-doubt and in some
cases it can limit our ambitions in life
for so long we have been taught that
being a modest
will take as far in life but i’m not
sure that is the full story
when we look at some of the most
inspirational and successful people
in the world was it their
self-deprecating attitude that
accelerated their career
or was it their promotional team working
in the background
making everything happen for them would
their inventions have been picked up
in stores or would their songs have been
played on mainstream media
without the marketing support of others
no
everything in life is marketed now i’m
not suggesting you create your own
publicity team
but what i am highlighting to you is
that people are rarely plucked out of
crowds for being
an unstoppable force they invest in
self-promotion
in order to stand out so whether you
outsource it or you make it your
responsibility
embracing self-promotion is not optional
it’s essential
now before you tense up and insist that
you don’t do self-promotion and it’s
just not for you
i want to give you the actual definition
of the word
because i think somewhere along the
lines the meaning has got lost
so when you take the word self-promotion
self means
i and promotion is just an activity that
supports
an aim or a goal so why are we so scared
to embrace it
sure you might feel that it’s a lack of
experience or confidence
but something that i’ve observed that i
think is the problem that stops us from
pursuing it
is that we’re held back by foss the fear
of sounding stupid
this is a phrase i’ve coined to
summarize the paralysis that we face
when it comes to promoting ourselves we
are so
concerned about how others will perceive
us that it stops
us from sharing our full selves and our
successes
many people worry about being classed as
a fraud
and others just don’t believe in
themselves enough to convince themselves
to everyone around them
but what happens as a result is that we
fall into
camp generic a space where we and others
around
us can’t identify our distinctive and
unique qualities
the irony of it all is that we’re all so
busy caring about ourselves
we’re not actually caring about the
people around us
so rather than wasting your time
questioning what
a linkedin connection you’ve never
actually met might
think of you for sharing a work with why
not instead
focus on all the amazing things that
could happen as a result of opening up
the reason i speak so highly about
self-promotion
is that i have witnessed first-hand the
positive impact it can have on both
myself and the community that i support
it hasn’t been an easy ride and it has
taken a lot of me
helping people convince themselves to
believe in themselves and what they are
capable of
but i think the two components that have
really helped to make this work
is first of all accepting that you are
good at what you do
this might mean actually accepting the
praise that you get from other people
or just identifying yourself when you
feel you’ve done a good job
and secondly taking pride in what you do
rather than leaving work at the office
you give yourself the time
and space to revel in your achievements
neither of these have to be done
publicly
but they should be done personally and
consistently
because the more you do it the less
intimidating
it will feel without this reflection we
freeze in moments where we should speak
up whether it’s inputting your opinion
in a meeting
or small talk at a networking event or
even putting forward your case for a
promotion or a pay rise
we miss out on opportunities because we
haven’t given ourselves the credit
of everything we’ve achieved we have to
stop
waiting and looking for others to
validate us
and start by validating ourselves by
owning our achievements
throughout my career i have felt
overlooked and undervalued
i have felt like a cog in the machine
championing other people’s values and
goals and missions
it was only until i took a leap of faith
in myself
and started this movement did i actually
start to be seen for
all the amazing things that i could do
and that was capable of
i’ve unlocked doors that i’ve never
thought i would
from writing a book to giving this talk
i am proof that when you invest in
yourself
you can change your future i want to
make it clear that i truly do believe
in humility and i think there will
always be a space for it in your career
but it should never get in the way of
moments when you have the ability to
shape your future
the thing i think many of us forget is
in order for us to be humble or
modest we must first be celebrated
and we’re unlikely to be celebrated if
we’re not being seen
so you can work really hard day in and
day out
but if you are not showing people what
you can do then you might wait a long
time
to actually be admired in your industry
for everything that you are achieving
and doing
this is not about being arrogant it’s
about
claiming your worth and never letting
your mind being consumed
by self-doubt and reminding yourself
that you
are worthy and you deserve to be proud
self-promotion isn’t a dirty word so
don’t let people make you feel
guilty for celebrating your success
care less share more thank you
you