Reclaim Your Worth By Sharing Your Voice
[Music]
[Applause]
i once stated a guy
when i didn’t know my worth who said my
face isn’t that pretty
but my credit might work
i once dated this guy
when i didn’t know my worth who told me
to be patient
i was second in line don’t worry
the first one might not work
i even dated this guy when i didn’t know
my worth
he had an additional family secret lies
and dirt
i decided to date this guy
when i didn’t value my own worth
and because of my fear of being alone
i just settled with his cruel words
and convinced myself words
don’t hurt
i once dated this guy
when i didn’t know my worth that when i
said
no regarding my body
he held my hands down and said
shh be quiet
this won’t hurt
once stated a guy when i didn’t know my
worth that i was willing
to compromise my faith value
and good judgment and just pray please
let this relationship work
i once was a girl but now i’m a woman
that still does not know
her worth and the decisions that you see
were a direct result of the thoughts
that i had of me
i was on this tedious long journey
and i didn’t even know that i was lost
and because of it
my self-esteem my self-love
and my confidence paid the cost
i was living in the shadow and i didn’t
even know that there could be light
until one day
one day i found myself
i found myself to be beautiful
i found myself to have joy
i found myself to have a voice i found
myself in the will of god but most
importantly
i found me
and i gained the best gift that one
could have
and celebrate all year long
the gift of self-love
so i speak to the little girl
i speak to the grown woman
that does not know her
worth remember you are fearfully
and wonderfully made you keep saying
that
until your mind believes it you keep
saying that
until your heart receives it and you
keep saying that until your life
reflects it
that was my truth i wrote that poem when
i turned
38 years old never forget that
it’s like my freedom speech right
have you ever lived in shame
struggled with feeling unworthy
seeking validation from others
maybe you just worried about what people
would think of you
you see i can answer yes to every last
one of those questions
maybe you can’t relate to losing your
voice
in the search of some man’s arms
or seeking validation
and to feel your void of loneliness
through others
but i could
but tell me this what happens when they
no longer clap for you
what happens when they no longer feel
the quest that you seek which is just to
be loved
heard seen or appreciated
i’ll tell you if you live for their
applause
you’ll die by their silence i know
because i speak from a place of
experience i lived
my life committed to gaining the
approval of
others even at the thought of losing my
own identity my own
voice it took me 38 38 years to arrive
to my aha moment
that’s why i stand here and speak my
truth that’s why i share my story
because if i can just help one person
one person
break free of the bondage then i have
changed a legacy
theirs and they’re worth it
you’re worth it so if you’re hearing
this message today
and it resonates with you repeat after
me
say i’m worth it worthy is
my name sometimes we have to rely on the
strength of
others as we’re building that muscle on
our own
i’m worth it no matter my past
no matter my imperfections no matter my
mistakes
even if i allowed the past mistreatment
i decided my only option was forward
and please note it wasn’t based on how i
felt
it wasn’t even based on me knowing the
end results
because if i based it on how i felt or
knowing all the answers
i would still be in my abyss of i’m not
good enough
let me tell you what i did i just
embraced
the courage to first decide
i finally got into the space where i was
no longer
a voiceless victim but i
became a victorious advocate advocating
for my right
to simply exist and not based on
anyone’s else approval
but my own reclaiming my worth
by sharing my voice my truth
i started taking responsibility to
change the narrative of my own story
you know what releasing the past because
i couldn’t control it
but directing that which i could and by
doing that
i put myself in a space to embrace the
love that was waiting for me
and the help that was waiting to guide
me to my best
yes the best version of my yes yes
that happened to me however i’m still
thriving
yes i’ve been misunderstood
however i’m still whole
yes i did say that however
now my language matches my words
i am loving the woman i am as i’m
working on a woman i’m yet to become
i’m loving the woman i am as i’m working
on the woman i’m yet to become
no longer looking for the light at the
end of the tunnel realizing that the
light is within me
that sounds great right so what i want
to do now
is share with you three steps that i
took that i know that you can take two
to get to this space
called worthy the first step
is i decided and i decided to act
an act is an acronym that stands for
action changes things as you
act so shall you be
don’t allow your fear to direct your
decisions
but allow your action to diminish your
fears
right we no longer can do the things of
the past
when we are moving forward action
changes
things every day we are going to act
and what are we going to do we are going
to say
i’m worthy worthy is my name
and as you’re saying that i need you to
visualize it
what does worthy look like for me how do
i
show up as worthy what does it feel like
i need you to
become the embodiment of worthy you
directed you created it’s your
destination
i am worthy every single
day you say it you
believe it you become it
that’s step one step two we’re going to
change
our narrative what we think and what we
write
why because it needs to serve our place
called worthy we have to actually write
it down
it’s so important that we track what we
say why because if we don’t track it
we can’t address it and we have to
address it
because you’re necessary right
right we cannot change what we have
learned to tolerate
and you are necessary
and so when we track it what can we do
then we can look at it
and we can address it is it true
is it kind and is it necessary and if
not
guess what we must acquit we have to
dismiss it
right and if you find out you know what
this
is true then you need to say it in a way
that honors your place
called worthy and how do you do that you
rewrite it
rewrite it in a way that serves you
that honors you and then we’re going to
take this action
one step forward we’re going to record
it as well
why i had to do this because i spent
20 plus years hearing my voice
dishonor my very existence i was used to
hearing myself say
you’re nothing you can’t do this you’re
not worthy
i had to get used to myself in this
place called worthy
and my new voice is loving kind
and considerate so we have to record
our rewrites okay so that when
things come to us we can quickly play
that
and aggressively address those things
that no longer serve us
so step one act step two
we’re gonna write now we are at step
three we’re gonna take the pledge
however before we go into the pledge
i want to share with you
that there will come a time
you’ll have moments when negative talk
will come to you
but i want to tell you to move forward
anyway i want to remind you to remember
step one decide to move
right decide to act
and be mindful negative talk does not
discriminate
it doesn’t care who you are it doesn’t
care about your background it doesn’t
care that you’re taking these
three steps negative talk will come for
you
right and when negative talk comes for
you
i need you to ask it one question
ask it who sent you no really ask it who
sent you
did my childhood trauma send you did
what my mama say to me send you
did what my boss say to me send you did
my abusive
partner send you who sent
you i need to know who sent you so that
i can deal
with it i have invested too much time
emotionally
spiritually into this thought into this
action
and in order for me to change and deal
with it i need to know who sent you
ask it who sent you we’re not gonna fake
it till we make it
we’re gonna address it so we no longer
regress in it by asking
who sent you okay
now we understand that we understand
that we can have a moment
but the difference is we will no longer
cultivate that moment as our reality
so now we’re ready to take our pledge
and what is a pledge it’s a promise a
commitment
a vow an oath we’re all familiar with
pledges
man we’ve been taking pledges since
since we were little if you’ve ever been
in a boy scouts
girl scouts we take a pledge if you’ve
been in the military we take an oath to
serve our country
if you get married we take a pledge for
richer for poorer for better or worse
now i’m asking you to take a pledge with
the person that you will be with
until death literally do you part
you’re never going to leave you so you
might as well
learn to like love and appreciate this
person
so the pledge is simple the pledge is
i’m worthy worthy is my name not because
of
not in spite of i’m worthy
and i pledge to treat myself as such
that’s it today is your day and remember
the three steps make a decision today to
act
action changes things two
change the narrative of our thoughts and
our words
three take the pledge i’m worthy
and i pledge to treat myself as such
and in closing i want you to grab a
mirror
and as you’re taking the pledge i want
you to look at yourself
and as you’re making the promise and as
you’re saying i’m worthy
and as you’re saying i have decided to
act
action changes things action
changes things action
changes things
what you will really realize is that
action
changes me and as i stated at the
beginning
of the talk in my poem you keep saying
that
until your mind believes it you
keep saying that until your heart
receives it and you
keep saying that until your life
reflects it because worthy
is your name